The Bitter Taste
school
house.
    She pushed through the crowd, ignoring their
protests until she came to the centre of the circle. Centehua lay
on the ground, her sobs muffled only by the grass. Around her the
people stood silent- even the children stopped their play. Two
women came forward and tried to pull Centehua to her feet.
    “What has happened?” Yau asked the silent
crowd. Her stomach felt as though it were trying to claw its way
out of her body.
    “Amoxtl,” one of the men said, and when he
turned to face her his eyes were bright with unshed tears. “We
heard him shout, but when we got there, it was too late...”
    There was a feeling of something going thud
in the back of Yau’s mind.
    “Tepil,” she said. “Where is Tepil?” she
searched the crowd, looking for her brother’s familiar face.
“Tepil!” she shouted.
    Someone grabbed her arm.
    “No, child,” the man said, pulling her into a
sympathetic hug. “It was too late. The maidens had already taken
him.”
    “No,” she whispered.
    “Amoxtl lived long enough to tell us. He
fought them. Tepil fought them until they dragged him under and he
couldn’t come back.”
    Yau stood in his arms, her entire body numb.
She watched as the women finally managed to lever Centehua to her
feet and lead her away. The grip around her loosened. The people
began to move away. There would be no more work today. The priests
would come to calm and pray with them.
    “No,” she whispered again. Her head buzzed
with static- thoughts half formed and then flitted away without
resistance. She fought against the emotions inside her. She wanted
to throw herself on the ground and wail until her throat was
bloodied tatters, she wanted to howl and curse the gods until they
destroyed her.
    There would be no burial, she thought as she
watched Amoxtl’s remains- wrapped in a shroud- be carried to his
house. He would rest there while his soul detached itself and then
he would be buried and his soul ushered to the underworld where he
would rest. Tepil would not have that honour- without his body he
would wander forever lost.
    Yau walked. It was automatic. She gave no
thought to where she was going and paid no heed to those that
called her name.
    There was ice in her veins now. She was numb
to the pain of loss, to the anguish of being alone.
    She recognised obstacles in her way- the
women who would help her grieve until the priests came. She did not
register their faces and pushed past them when they reached out to
stop her.
    She walked faster, listening only to the
pounding of her heart and the beat of her soles on the ground.
Faster and faster, until she was running- out of the village, away
from the people. She ran across the open land until grass became
dirt and dirt became sand.
    She was neither surprised nor dismayed when
she came back to herself and found she was standing at the shore,
the warm saltwater lapping at her does, the wet sand cool beneath
her feet.
    The water was calm- placid; a perfect mirror
reflection of the blue sky above. Further out, past the rocks that
rose like a god’s fingers, the water was darker and choppier.
Dolphins frolicked there, rising out of the sea in graceful arcs.
It made her sick to see them filled with so much joy.
    She fell to her knees, retching as the water
lulled around her limbs. She curled her hands into fists, crushing
the sand in her palm, feeling the tiny bits of grit force their way
down her nails, compressing together and forcing skin away from
nail plate.
    She cried; her tears finally freed were hot
on her cheeks, dripping into the sea as she vomited up her
breakfast.
    She sobbed- hard and hoarse as grief swept
over her, engulfing her mind and purging her of rational
thought.
     
    *
     
    She didn’t know when she had collapsed in the water,
her body still shaking. The water was both salve and irritant as it
pooled around her and then left her in gentle waves.
    She became aware of the silence- only the
sound of water moving filled her ears.

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