The Bride Test

The Bride Test by Helen Hoang Page A

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Authors: Helen Hoang
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Ngọc Anh? Can I talk to her?”
    “She’s fine, excited to have a dad soon. Talk to me a little. How are things? Do you like him?” her mom asked.
    “Yes, I like him.”
    A pleased
hmmmmm
sounded on the line. “That’s good. What about his house? Is it nice?”
    “I like it,” Esme said. “The room I’m staying in has pretty paper on the wall. If Ngọc Anh saw it, she’d like it. There’s a couch for me.”
    “You’re not sleeping with him?”
    She rolled her eyes. “No, Má, I’m not sleeping with him. Do you remember? He doesn’t want a wife.”
    “That doesn’t mean he wants to sleep alone.”
    “I just got off the plane,” she reminded her mom. She needed time to work her seductive powers on him. If she even had such powers anymore. Working as much as she did, she didn’t have the time to date. Or the desire. Just the memory of her mom’s and grandma’s faces when they’d found out about her pregnancy was enough to make any man look uninteresting.
    “Oh, that’s right, long flight,” her mom said. After a quiet moment, her mom continued. “Can you unscrew one of the legs off the couch and say it broke?”
    “Why would I do that?”
    “So you can sleep with him, daughter of mine.”
    Esme pulled the phone away and stared at it. Who was this woman she was talking to? The voice sounded like her mom’s, but not the words. “I can’t do that. It’s
wrong
.”
    “Fine, forget I said it,” her mom grumbled. “Here, talk to your girl.”
    “Má.”
The little voice made Esme’s heart melt even as it broke her. She should be there, not here on the other side of the world chasing a man.
    “Hi, my girl. I miss you too much. What have you been doing since I’ve been gone?”
    “I caught a big fish in the pond yesterday. Great-Grandma killed it by slamming it against a tree, and after that, we ate it for dinner. My fish was
good
.”
    Esme covered her eyes with a hand.
Killed it by slamming it against a tree ...
Esme in Accounting would be appalled by this conversation. Not only would she not have a five-year-old daughter out of wedlock, but her daughter wouldn’t be catching her own dinner. There certainly wouldn’t be any killing by slamming anything against a tree.
    But at least her girl was happy. It was sinful to take a life, even a fish life, but Esme would gladly sacrifice an entire school of trout to distract Jade from missing her momma too much. She put her feet up and rested her heavy head against the couch’s armrest as Jade rambled on about fish, worms, and crickets. When her eyelids drifted shut, she could almost sense the Việt Nam sun on her skin, almost feel her baby in her arms. She fell asleep with a smile on her lips.

S omething wet landed on Khai’s face. And again. Like raindrops. Except he was in bed. Was the ceiling leaking? Was his house going to cave in on him?
    He opened his eyes and almost shouted.
    Esme stood next to his bed, dripping wet in nothing but a towel.
    “I think I broke your shower. Water is all over.” She bunched the towel closer to her chest.
    He sat upright, rubbed a hand over his face, and prepared to get out of bed. “Lemme get it. It’s probably just the setting—
Shit.

    He yanked the covers back over his crotch. He was sporting some mega-monster morning wood. She didn’t need to see this. The way he was pitching a tent in his boxers was grotesque, and she’d probably mistake it as a reaction to
her
. When it wasn’t.
    Most days, he woke up like this, and it wasn’t like he was nursing an out-of-control porn addiction or something. It was just a natural biological response to morning levels of testosterone. One that he could’ve done without. His mornings would be so much more efficient if he didn’t have to jack off in the shower every day.
    When he caught her looking at his naked chest and abs, however, he stopped thinking about efficiency and inconvenient hormone levels. She bit her bottom lip, and he swore he felt her

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