dancing and his shirt buttons are undone halfway down his chest. He
catches my eye and winks.
The dancing continues until nearly midnight when the band stops playing, although I barely notice
with the amount of shouting, laughter and singing going on. Everyone holds hands. The TV above the
bar is on. Alekos holds me, and a stranger’s sweaty hand grips my free one. We drown the Athens
crowd out with our countdown: ‘ Dheka, enea, okto, epta, eksi, pende, tesera, tria, dhio, ena! Kali xrhonia! ’
Alekos kisses me, his arms encircling me as he whispers. ‘This is our year, Sophie.’ Then he’s
dragged away by Despina and I’m left with strangers kissing me on my cheeks and wishing me a good
New Year. That is the least I’m hoping for. I want more than a good New Year. I want a
perfect one. The New Year is supposed to bring us our independence. It doesn’t matter
if it’s an apartment the size of a garden shed, as long as it’s the two of us on our own.
Then there’s our wedding the following year and after that the possibility is there to start a
family.
I slip out of the restaurant and into the dark kitchen. It’s cold without the ovens on or the lights
blazing. I sit halfway up the stone steps that lead to the apartment. The live music has started again
and vibrates through the place, along with the stamping of feet and clapping of hands. I hug my knees
to my chest and can’t stop myself from crying.
‘I’ll be here for you if it doesn’t work out.’ Those were Mum’s last words to me. There was no truth
in them. Why wouldn’t it work out? I love Alekos. End of story.
He finds me sitting on the shadowy stairs. I have no idea how long I’ve been here but I feel numb
with cold and my cheeks are tight from tears I can’t be bothered to wipe away.
‘It’s snowing,’ he says. Standing a couple of steps below me our faces are level. His brown eyes bore
into me but I can barely look at him. ‘What’s the matter, Sophie?’ He lifts my chin up. ‘You’ve been
crying.’
‘We need to sort our lives out.’
‘Right this minute?’ he asks. ‘We’re going to Katerini soon.’
‘I’m not going.’
He kneels on the step below me. ‘You’re joking, right?’
‘I know it’s New Year’s Eve but I feel sad.’
He takes my face in his hands. ‘Actually it’s New Year’s Day and you should be happy.’
‘Well, I’m not.’
His hands drop and he moves next to me, so we’re shoulder to shoulder on the stairs.
‘We can talk if you want,’ he says and sighs.
‘You won’t want to hear it.’
‘Try me.’
‘This year’s going to be different, isn’t it?’
‘I promise.’
‘No,’ I say, turning to look at him. ‘Don’t just promise. Let’s do it – move out.’
He’s silent for a moment. The coldness of the stone steps has seeped through my trousers. I twist
the engagement ring on my finger.
‘We’re getting married in less than eighteen months’ time, Sophie. If we wait until after our wedding
we can sort ourselves out a bit more,’ he says slowly. He looks ahead and not at me. Our shadows are
huge against the white wall, we look like shadow puppets. Our conversations are a performance, each of
us saying the same things over and over again, night after night, month after month. It’s getting tiring.
The fact he can’t look me in the eye tells me he’s breaking last summer’s promise. I stand up and head
down the stairs.
‘Where are you going?’ he asks.
‘To see the snow.’
He scrambles after me.
Outside the kitchen door white flakes glow in the light as they fall thickly to the ground. I hear
voices from the other side of the restaurant and Yannis’ unmistakable giggle. I go as far as the patio
and switch on one of the heaters. Alekos joins me at the table. Through the arch in the wall, Christmas
lights cast red and green light on to the nearly white field. All the children, Yannis included, are
running about, trying to catch the snow. The music
catches my eye and winks.
The dancing continues until nearly midnight when the band stops playing, although I barely notice
with the amount of shouting, laughter and singing going on. Everyone holds hands. The TV above the
bar is on. Alekos holds me, and a stranger’s sweaty hand grips my free one. We drown the Athens
crowd out with our countdown: ‘ Dheka, enea, okto, epta, eksi, pende, tesera, tria, dhio, ena! Kali xrhonia! ’
Alekos kisses me, his arms encircling me as he whispers. ‘This is our year, Sophie.’ Then he’s
dragged away by Despina and I’m left with strangers kissing me on my cheeks and wishing me a good
New Year. That is the least I’m hoping for. I want more than a good New Year. I want a
perfect one. The New Year is supposed to bring us our independence. It doesn’t matter
if it’s an apartment the size of a garden shed, as long as it’s the two of us on our own.
Then there’s our wedding the following year and after that the possibility is there to start a
family.
I slip out of the restaurant and into the dark kitchen. It’s cold without the ovens on or the lights
blazing. I sit halfway up the stone steps that lead to the apartment. The live music has started again
and vibrates through the place, along with the stamping of feet and clapping of hands. I hug my knees
to my chest and can’t stop myself from crying.
‘I’ll be here for you if it doesn’t work out.’ Those were Mum’s last words to me. There was no truth
in them. Why wouldn’t it work out? I love Alekos. End of story.
He finds me sitting on the shadowy stairs. I have no idea how long I’ve been here but I feel numb
with cold and my cheeks are tight from tears I can’t be bothered to wipe away.
‘It’s snowing,’ he says. Standing a couple of steps below me our faces are level. His brown eyes bore
into me but I can barely look at him. ‘What’s the matter, Sophie?’ He lifts my chin up. ‘You’ve been
crying.’
‘We need to sort our lives out.’
‘Right this minute?’ he asks. ‘We’re going to Katerini soon.’
‘I’m not going.’
He kneels on the step below me. ‘You’re joking, right?’
‘I know it’s New Year’s Eve but I feel sad.’
He takes my face in his hands. ‘Actually it’s New Year’s Day and you should be happy.’
‘Well, I’m not.’
His hands drop and he moves next to me, so we’re shoulder to shoulder on the stairs.
‘We can talk if you want,’ he says and sighs.
‘You won’t want to hear it.’
‘Try me.’
‘This year’s going to be different, isn’t it?’
‘I promise.’
‘No,’ I say, turning to look at him. ‘Don’t just promise. Let’s do it – move out.’
He’s silent for a moment. The coldness of the stone steps has seeped through my trousers. I twist
the engagement ring on my finger.
‘We’re getting married in less than eighteen months’ time, Sophie. If we wait until after our wedding
we can sort ourselves out a bit more,’ he says slowly. He looks ahead and not at me. Our shadows are
huge against the white wall, we look like shadow puppets. Our conversations are a performance, each of
us saying the same things over and over again, night after night, month after month. It’s getting tiring.
The fact he can’t look me in the eye tells me he’s breaking last summer’s promise. I stand up and head
down the stairs.
‘Where are you going?’ he asks.
‘To see the snow.’
He scrambles after me.
Outside the kitchen door white flakes glow in the light as they fall thickly to the ground. I hear
voices from the other side of the restaurant and Yannis’ unmistakable giggle. I go as far as the patio
and switch on one of the heaters. Alekos joins me at the table. Through the arch in the wall, Christmas
lights cast red and green light on to the nearly white field. All the children, Yannis included, are
running about, trying to catch the snow. The music
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