The Cowboy Bible and Other Stories by Carlos Velázquez Page B

appears as a mantelpiece, or as the folkloric figure in the Mexican lottery? Chalupa y buenas. To try and solve the problem, we can humangenomemap it in three ways:
A Appealing to the common denominator. That is, like Ned Flanders;
B Like a culiche boxer before he steps into the ring. With Los Huracanes del Norte’s song, Lincoln negro, like an idiosyncratic headline;
C Refuting the theory that God is black, and sponsoring evil as such from November 2nd, 19**. A chocolate devil.
    This would explain a whole shitload of stuff. First, that the dubbing of this equation would be double-spaced, that the devil would be well endowed, and, lastly, that The Cowgirl Bible would adopt blues and soul roots as her musical model, without giving up the best licks and tricks used by white blues and psychedelic axers. Satan told her: Jaimito Hendrics always played black material. With the following exceptions: Cream, a little Dylan, The Beatles, and The Troggs’ Wild Thing.
    The Cowgirl Bible’s success, like gears on a car, rested on four foundational perspectives. First, second, third, and fourth: the historic appearances she made at the London bar Bag O’Nails before the stars of British razordom. *
    That’s why, when The Cowgirl Bible returned to her homeland, PopSTock! of the drunken crazies, the audience got used to the syntax of her instrument as easily as an IMSS nurse learns to ignore patients. That’s how intoxicating The Cowgirl Bible’s sound became for the neo-public. Neglected compatriots who come to in the sanatorium, here’s your meal your bed your nurse, who hit you buddy. Rock it. Especially if it’s your first record. The polar bear robs robs robs me , gets a rating of ten from the untamable critics. The next step is to get billed as the warm-up act on a Coca-Cola sponsored tour. And from there it’s gravy.
    That is, until the day the following warning popped up on The Cowgirl Bible’s computer:
    BRONTOK.A [10]
—Hentikan kebobrokan di negeri ini —
1. Penjarakan Koruptor, Penyelundup, Tukang Suap & Bandar NARKOBA
(Send to NUSAKAMBANGAN)
2. Stop Free Sex, Aborsi & Prostitusi
(Go To HELL)
3. Stop pencemaran lingkungan, pembakaran hutan & perburuan liar
4. SAY NO TO DRUGS!!!
— KIAMAT SUDAH DEKAT —
Terinspirasi oleh:
Elang Brontok (Spizaetus Cirrhatus) yang hampir punah
[By HVM3l]
—JowoBot #VM Community —
!!! Akan Kubuat Mereka (VM lokal yg cengeng & bodoh) Terkapar!!!
    OMG. Is that hot enough? The previous warning doesn’t mean what it means. Anita, sit next to Billy ain’t the same as sit on the billy. In fact, the warning said the devil needed The Cowgirl Bible’s soul. It was time. To pay up. If you should see that warning on your screen, be very very careful, it’s a sign you’re pretty much done for. It’d be best to seek refuge, just in case the Hacienda, Quinta, and Rancho all come down on you.
    Hey, Devil, no worries, I’m gonna pay up, just hold the carnitas, let me keep the tamales. That’s what The Cowgirl Bible wanted to say, but she didn’t get a chance. The evil one had arrived. And time, dear spectator, time is pop. The Devil is pop. Love is pop. And pop is a whore. From that moment on, The Cowgirl Bible had no choice but to avoid at all costs the disgraceful signs of pop. Like, for example, playing the lottery. And since she was a wrestling addict, she avoided all matches that featured the Evil team, such as Satánico or the DEA’s Arcángel. She fed her paranoia to such an extent that she stopped consuming vampiros , with their salsa verde, refrain of refried beans, hot tortillas, and icy Victoria beers. How she’d loved them. Too bad. But no tears.
    Before any more of this blah blah blah, prepared by Lexus and based on a plan boosted by HarperCollins, we’re gonna pay attention to the regression hypnosis that will reveal, via The Cowgirl Bible’s own words, the strategy that should be used by anyone interested in selling their soul to the Devil:
The crossroads are at El Cerro