The Dead Saga (Book 3): Odium III by Claire C. Riley

cackle—well, infamous to us three, but whatever. I wasn’t sure if her cackling outburst meant that she was agreeing with us on the crazy front or if she was even offended anymore. This chick was screwing with my head.
    “Lady, there aren’t enough cats in the world for your level of crazy!” I yelled back to her before sneezing into my hand.
    Crazy Pants held up the key of the truck, dangling it in the air between us with a gleeful smile.
    “Shit,” I cursed, giving Nova a sidelong glance of annoyance. “You left the key in the ignition?”
    I knew she felt my death stare but she didn’t say anything about it. Instead she chose to cock her gun as a warning to the woman. I didn’t need to look at her to know that she was pointing it straight at the face of the crazy bitch.
    “Give us the damn truck key,” I snarled, “or she will shoot you.”
    The old lady cackled loudly again, baring her gummy mouth to me, and I couldn’t contain the grimace from my face.
    “Dude, that’s just gross.” Nova elbowed me in the rib and I nodded my agreement.
    There were many downsides to the end of the world—obviously the whole life-and-death and constant perilous situations were always at the top of that list—but there were other things that I had never really considered before. One of them being dental care. Sure, we brushed our teeth as best we could—hell, I even carried my toothbrush and toothpaste tube around with me wherever I went like a damn health commercial. Boys and girls, always brush twice a day, and in the event of an apocalypse remember to pack your essentials—gun, knife, tooth brush. Safety first kids, safety first. However, I was way overdue for my six-month checkup at the dentist.
    I looked at the woman’s rotten, gummy mouth and felt a little nauseous. And a little sorry for her, truth be told. I was never a fan of the dentist, but if I would have known then what I knew now, I would never have eaten all that candy growing up. Or at least I like to believe that I would have been a touch more consistent on flossing. I had at least two fillings in my teeth, and I didn’t know what I’d do if I ever needed any more. I’d met many people in the past four years, but never a dentist.
    “Please,” I said sincerely to the old lady.
    She was clearly off her freaking rocker, but wouldn’t anyone be if they were there all alone? After seeing what she’d most likely seen?
    “Please give us the keys. You can come with us.”
    “Finders keepers, losers weepers.” She cackled again, her eyes wild.
    I sighed heavily, not wanting to hurt this woman, but it was getting to the point that we had little choice in the matter. We needed that key, regardless of what the consequences were to her, and Nova was quickly losing her patience. I sneezed again, pain shooting behind my eyes as I did.
    “Actually, that’s not how the saying goes,” Nova offered.
    The old lady looked confused for a minute, staring into space, and then put one of her bony fingers into her mouth as if chewing on a nail while she thought about it. She eventually called bullshit on Nova, and I couldn’t blame her since that was definitely how the saying went.
    “I’m serious,” Nova continued. “The saying is, ‘finders keepers, when I get my hands on you, I’m going to snap your scrawny neck!’” she growled out.
    The rain was pouring down now and we were all getting completely soaked through, not to mention it was freezing. I was more than over the whole stupid conversation. My backpack was pressing into my back uncomfortably, my soaking wet clothes offering no padding against the weapons within it, so I could totally understand Nova’s aggressiveness, yet I was still a little shocked by her lack of compassion. It was normally me that was the miserable bitch, and her the fun-loving one that enjoyed dancing in the rain and long walks on the beach. Could it be that my bad attitude was rubbing off on her?
    The old lady backed up