The Education of Bet by Lauren Baratz-Logsted

acceptable alternative to the other male form of walking, purposeful striding.
    The old man cleared his throat. "When you and Elizabeth depart in the morning, I will still be in bed. Have you completed your packing yet?"
    "Of course," I started, then, remembering that I was supposed to be Will—Will, who would never do anything now if he could do it later—I hastily added, "
not.
"
    The old man was silent for a moment, his mouth a round
o
of shock at Will's
—my
—insolence. And then he did a startling thing. He laughed.
    "Oh, Will," he said, making a great effort to recover himself after his outburst of mirth, "in a strange way it is good to know that your unwillingness to toe the line is as reliable as death and taxes." He paused as a coughing fit overtook him. Then: "I suppose that you, being you, will not let the Betterman Academy get the better of you? And that after a fortnight or, at most, a whole term, you will arrange to have yourself sent down once more?"
    A part of me understood that to successfully impersonate Will, I had to imitate what he would do in both word and deed. But another part of me, a part that was far stronger in that moment, could not allow the notion of myself as one who disappoints to continue—no matter who that self was supposed to be at the time.
    I knelt at the old man's feet.
    "You are wrong, Uncle," I vowed. "This time, things will be different. This time, I will distinguish myself."
    He laughed once more. "Well, that should be easy enough."
    "How do you mean?"
    "Surely, you must have surmised by now that the Betterman Academy is a last ditch, a place where parents and guardians stow their charges when no one else in the world will have them; a place for misfits, miscreants, and ne'er-do-wells—you realize that, do you not?"
    I felt my cheeks color at this, and when I spoke, it was with conviction. "Then it should be easy for me to distinguish myself, should it not? I shall be first among equals."
    "You are serious, aren't you?" He was shocked; amazed, really.
    "I am, sir. I mean, Uncle. What's more, I will write you every week to inform you of my progress. You will no doubt need something to occupy you, since I will be gone and that ...
girl
will no longer be underfoot."
    "I shall miss having the girl underfoot," the old man said softly, surprising me. "And, of course, I will miss you, boy."
    And that's when he touched me. He placed his gnarled hand on my head like a benediction, and then, with great effort, he heaved himself forward enough in his chair so that he might kiss my brow.
    "I love you, Will," he said gruffly.
    "I love you too, Uncle," I responded clearly, not caring in the moment if Will would say that or not, only caring that the old man should hear those words from at least one of us,
someone,
before we left him behind.
    ***
    Unlike Will, I had long since finished my packing. Indeed, I had been ready to go for days; the trunk Will had purchased for me was crammed full of the male clothing Will had given me, as well as one dress and my wig.
    "You never know when you might need to be a girl again at a moment's notice" had been his mocking advice.
    "And why would I need that?" I'd asked.
    That's when he added details to my original plan. He said that in order to perpetuate the fiction that he was at school while I was companion to Mrs. Larwood, we'd need to arrange for things like visits home. Since Michaelmas half at the Betterman Academy ran from early September through the middle of December, I was to arrive home, as Will, in mid-December. Right before Christmas week, I, as Will, would announce that I was spending the holiday with a classmate's family. Then I would appear as myself, as the letter from Mrs. Larwood's daughter had indicated I would be given that week off. Once that week had passed, I would become Will again for the final week before returning to school. In this way, the old man would still be able to receive visits from both of us, even if he never saw us