evening was comfortably warm and once outside, Jamie skipped ahead. Michael casually placed his hand over hers. She didn’t pull away, but he didn’t doubt she wanted to.
“On a night such as this, it is difficult to believe winter is almost upon us,” he said, deciding the weather would be a safe topic.
****
Diana desperately wanted to return to her room where she would be safe from his touches. He confused her. At least with Leo, she knew to always expect the worst and could prepare for it. When she spilled her wine, she had waited for Daventry’s anger at her stupidity, but he acted as if nothing had happened. Was he saving her punishment to spring on her later? Leo often did, sometimes waiting until she had forgotten the offense.
Daventry pulled her to a stop. Fully expecting to be admonished for spilling her wine, she braced herself for his tirade.
“I am not Leo. Listen. Spill your wine, drop your food on the floor, throw your bread at the wall if you wish, just know that you don’t need to fear me.” He gave her a sad little smile. “You once knew me very well and I think somewhere deep inside, you know I will not hurt you.”
She looked at him in amazement. How could he claim such a thing? “But you did hurt me.”
He squeezed his eyes shut and she regretted her words immediately. She would have never said such a thing to Leo, so why was her mouth saying these things to him? Was he right? Did she know deep inside he wouldn’t strike her in anger? He opened his eyes. There was regret in them.
“Yes, I did hurt you, didn’t I? To say I am sorrier than you will ever know likely doesn’t mean much to you now, but I am. God, I am. But it will not happen again. Never again.”
His apology was eleven years too late. Anger she had kept buried for too long took control of her, and she couldn’t stop the words from pouring out of her mouth.
“You could have stopped it from happening, but you didn’t and because of you, I spent eleven years in hell. You can take your apology and…and go to the devil with it.” She jerked her hand out of his and fled to the safety of her room.
Michael started to go after her when a small body slammed into him. “What did you do to Mama?”
Jamie beat at Michael’s ribs and belly with his fists. Michael gently took the boy’s hands in his. “Easy there. I didn’t touch your mother.” Still holding Jamie’s hands, he knelt down. “I told you the first day we met I would never strike her. I make this promise to you now, man to man. I will never raise my hands to her in anger. Any man that hits a woman is a sorry excuse for a man.”
“Father said it is a man’s duty to make a woman obey. Father said that sometimes it is the only way to gain her respect. Do you mean, sir, that Father was a sorry excuse for a man?”
Christ Almighty . Michael glanced at the small park across the street. “Come with me.” He led Jamie to a bench.
How to answer the boy’s question? He didn’t think a boy of ten years was ready to hear his sire was a monster. He was going to have to walk a fine line here, choosing his words carefully.
Seated on the bench, he took a moment to think how best to begin. “Sometimes, Jamie, people make mistakes, even fathers. I think what your father told you is wrong and I believe in your heart, you know it. Do you think it is honorable for anyone to strike someone weaker than them? For instance, is it right for a child to hit a helpless animal, or for a mother to hurt her child or a husband to beat his wife?”
Jamie looked at him with sad eyes. “No, sir. I didn’t like it when he hit Mama.”
He’d witnessed Leo striking Diana? “How do you know he hit your mother?”
There were tears in his eyes. Michael regretted the need for this conversation, but thought this was something Jamie needed to get off his little boy chest.
“Sometimes Father made me watch so I would learn how to be a man. I didn’t want to,” he said in a small
“On a night such as this, it is difficult to believe winter is almost upon us,” he said, deciding the weather would be a safe topic.
****
Diana desperately wanted to return to her room where she would be safe from his touches. He confused her. At least with Leo, she knew to always expect the worst and could prepare for it. When she spilled her wine, she had waited for Daventry’s anger at her stupidity, but he acted as if nothing had happened. Was he saving her punishment to spring on her later? Leo often did, sometimes waiting until she had forgotten the offense.
Daventry pulled her to a stop. Fully expecting to be admonished for spilling her wine, she braced herself for his tirade.
“I am not Leo. Listen. Spill your wine, drop your food on the floor, throw your bread at the wall if you wish, just know that you don’t need to fear me.” He gave her a sad little smile. “You once knew me very well and I think somewhere deep inside, you know I will not hurt you.”
She looked at him in amazement. How could he claim such a thing? “But you did hurt me.”
He squeezed his eyes shut and she regretted her words immediately. She would have never said such a thing to Leo, so why was her mouth saying these things to him? Was he right? Did she know deep inside he wouldn’t strike her in anger? He opened his eyes. There was regret in them.
“Yes, I did hurt you, didn’t I? To say I am sorrier than you will ever know likely doesn’t mean much to you now, but I am. God, I am. But it will not happen again. Never again.”
His apology was eleven years too late. Anger she had kept buried for too long took control of her, and she couldn’t stop the words from pouring out of her mouth.
“You could have stopped it from happening, but you didn’t and because of you, I spent eleven years in hell. You can take your apology and…and go to the devil with it.” She jerked her hand out of his and fled to the safety of her room.
Michael started to go after her when a small body slammed into him. “What did you do to Mama?”
Jamie beat at Michael’s ribs and belly with his fists. Michael gently took the boy’s hands in his. “Easy there. I didn’t touch your mother.” Still holding Jamie’s hands, he knelt down. “I told you the first day we met I would never strike her. I make this promise to you now, man to man. I will never raise my hands to her in anger. Any man that hits a woman is a sorry excuse for a man.”
“Father said it is a man’s duty to make a woman obey. Father said that sometimes it is the only way to gain her respect. Do you mean, sir, that Father was a sorry excuse for a man?”
Christ Almighty . Michael glanced at the small park across the street. “Come with me.” He led Jamie to a bench.
How to answer the boy’s question? He didn’t think a boy of ten years was ready to hear his sire was a monster. He was going to have to walk a fine line here, choosing his words carefully.
Seated on the bench, he took a moment to think how best to begin. “Sometimes, Jamie, people make mistakes, even fathers. I think what your father told you is wrong and I believe in your heart, you know it. Do you think it is honorable for anyone to strike someone weaker than them? For instance, is it right for a child to hit a helpless animal, or for a mother to hurt her child or a husband to beat his wife?”
Jamie looked at him with sad eyes. “No, sir. I didn’t like it when he hit Mama.”
He’d witnessed Leo striking Diana? “How do you know he hit your mother?”
There were tears in his eyes. Michael regretted the need for this conversation, but thought this was something Jamie needed to get off his little boy chest.
“Sometimes Father made me watch so I would learn how to be a man. I didn’t want to,” he said in a small
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