it had been a security for me. The ashes meant I still had my husband. It also meant I still had a reason to keep things exactly the way they were. All of that was about to change in a few short minutes.
Chapter 11: Trace
Maui
Deciding to get some fresh air, I headed toward the path along the ocean. The pain in my head had subsided and the ocean gave me an escape from the craziness I was going through. I wasn’t sure if it was the hypnotic motion of the waves or the calming sound they made crashing against the rocks. Maybe it was something else, but the ocean had a way of clearing my head.
I couldn’t help but notice a beautiful woman with long, golden hair sitting on the rocks, gazing into the horizon. On a rock next to her sat an urn . My heart sank in my chest. She was so young and I wondered who she’d lost. Suddenly, I didn’t feel so bad about my own life. Someone she loved was gone forever and she was here alone to say goodbye. Her trembling lip told me how sad and broken she must feel. I couldn’t imagine doing something like this alone. Didn’t she have any family? Or friends?
The need to hear what she was saying drew me to her, so I edged closer, but she didn’t see me in her peripheral vision. At least she didn’t look over in my direction. Why would she? She was lost in her own thoughts…grief. Tears streamed down her angelic face. I wanted to wipe them away and comfort her, but I kept myself at bay.
“How do I say goodbye to you, Dane? You’re the only one who has loved me, taken care of me, protected me. When you died, part of me died too. Part of my soul went with you and I don’t know if I’ll ever get it back. I love you so much and I always will.”
Her words were gut-wrenching and I assumed she was talking about a man she had been in love with. I wanted a woman to love me like that. I thought I had found it with Angelina, but she’d never seemed as sincere as this woman before me. An overwhelming force took over and my heart began racing. I wanted to sit next to her, wrap my arms around her, and tell her everything was going to be okay. She wasn’t alone.
Her shoulders slightly shook as more tears raced down her cheeks. She continued pouring her heart out. “This just isn’t fair. You were too young to die. We had so much life to live together. So many things to do. Some days, I don’t know how I live without you. It wasn’t supposed to be this way.” Then she bowed her head. I found myself bowing so I could pray silently for her.
“Dear Heavenly Father. Thank you so much for the gift of my husband Dane. You brought him into my life at just the right moment and used him to bless me more than I ever thought possible. I’m grateful that You love me so much to have given me such an amazing man. I commit Dane to You, knowing he is with You in Heaven. Please help me to move on in my life and have a life that You deem worthy. I love you, Lord, and want to honor You all the days of my life. Amen.”
Listening to her words made me choke up. I’d gone to church with my family when I was a kid. But now I basically went at Christmas and Easter for my mom. Her prayer was so heartfelt, so honest. Was this beauty for real? Not only did she look like an angel, she had a genuine heart filled with love. She was a rare find. Other than my mom and sisters, I couldn’t remember ever knowing someone like her, a woman with such great faith.
She stood up with the urn in her trembling hands, removed the cover, moved to the edge of the rocks, and began tossing her husband’s ashes into the ocean. The wind had picked up and I could see her struggling with the metal container. Her next movement was about to become her undoing as her foot slipped and I began watching in slow motion as her body was falling. Reacting quickly, I rushed to her, grabbing her hand, causing the urn to fall into the ocean. Instantly, she was in my arms, as I pulled her into my body to help ground her feet. Her crystal
Chapter 11: Trace
Maui
Deciding to get some fresh air, I headed toward the path along the ocean. The pain in my head had subsided and the ocean gave me an escape from the craziness I was going through. I wasn’t sure if it was the hypnotic motion of the waves or the calming sound they made crashing against the rocks. Maybe it was something else, but the ocean had a way of clearing my head.
I couldn’t help but notice a beautiful woman with long, golden hair sitting on the rocks, gazing into the horizon. On a rock next to her sat an urn . My heart sank in my chest. She was so young and I wondered who she’d lost. Suddenly, I didn’t feel so bad about my own life. Someone she loved was gone forever and she was here alone to say goodbye. Her trembling lip told me how sad and broken she must feel. I couldn’t imagine doing something like this alone. Didn’t she have any family? Or friends?
The need to hear what she was saying drew me to her, so I edged closer, but she didn’t see me in her peripheral vision. At least she didn’t look over in my direction. Why would she? She was lost in her own thoughts…grief. Tears streamed down her angelic face. I wanted to wipe them away and comfort her, but I kept myself at bay.
“How do I say goodbye to you, Dane? You’re the only one who has loved me, taken care of me, protected me. When you died, part of me died too. Part of my soul went with you and I don’t know if I’ll ever get it back. I love you so much and I always will.”
Her words were gut-wrenching and I assumed she was talking about a man she had been in love with. I wanted a woman to love me like that. I thought I had found it with Angelina, but she’d never seemed as sincere as this woman before me. An overwhelming force took over and my heart began racing. I wanted to sit next to her, wrap my arms around her, and tell her everything was going to be okay. She wasn’t alone.
Her shoulders slightly shook as more tears raced down her cheeks. She continued pouring her heart out. “This just isn’t fair. You were too young to die. We had so much life to live together. So many things to do. Some days, I don’t know how I live without you. It wasn’t supposed to be this way.” Then she bowed her head. I found myself bowing so I could pray silently for her.
“Dear Heavenly Father. Thank you so much for the gift of my husband Dane. You brought him into my life at just the right moment and used him to bless me more than I ever thought possible. I’m grateful that You love me so much to have given me such an amazing man. I commit Dane to You, knowing he is with You in Heaven. Please help me to move on in my life and have a life that You deem worthy. I love you, Lord, and want to honor You all the days of my life. Amen.”
Listening to her words made me choke up. I’d gone to church with my family when I was a kid. But now I basically went at Christmas and Easter for my mom. Her prayer was so heartfelt, so honest. Was this beauty for real? Not only did she look like an angel, she had a genuine heart filled with love. She was a rare find. Other than my mom and sisters, I couldn’t remember ever knowing someone like her, a woman with such great faith.
She stood up with the urn in her trembling hands, removed the cover, moved to the edge of the rocks, and began tossing her husband’s ashes into the ocean. The wind had picked up and I could see her struggling with the metal container. Her next movement was about to become her undoing as her foot slipped and I began watching in slow motion as her body was falling. Reacting quickly, I rushed to her, grabbing her hand, causing the urn to fall into the ocean. Instantly, she was in my arms, as I pulled her into my body to help ground her feet. Her crystal
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