was amazed at the sudden
harshness in his own voice. “How the hell do you think I got started in this
business in the first place?”
“Because you wanted to rescue people?”
His jaw tightened. “When I first started, the last
thing I planned to do was create a corporation like Business Intelligence and
Security. I was just a one-man operation in the beginning. I had some damn fool
idea that I could help balance the scales of justice for those who couldn't do
it on their own. Like I said, I wanted to play Sir Galahad. I wanted to charge
off to protect those who couldn't protect themselves.”
“What happened?” she asked gently.
Josh wished he had never started this conversation.
But for some reason he couldn't seem to stop it now.
“What happened was that I eventually learned that it's
damn tough to play hero because it's often impossible to tell the bad guys from
the good guys. That's what happened.”
“I don't understand.”
“Hell, Maggie, during my first five years as an
investigator I took on every sob-story case that walked through my front door.
And none of them were what they seemed.”
“Tell me,” she whispered, her eyes wide and searching.
“You want to know what being a private eye is really
like?” he asked roughly. “I’ll tell you what it's like. Fathers asked me to
find their little lost girl. I'd track down the kid and discover that she had
run away from home because she was more afraid of being abused by her father
than she was of life on the streets.”
“Oh, Josh.”
“I'd find missing wives for distraught husbands, and
the wives would tell me they had gone into hiding because their husbands
routinely beat them and threatened to kill them. They'd beg me not to tell my
clients where they were.”
“How awful…”
“And then there were the child-custody cases,” he
continued, feeling savage. “Parents wage war with each other and the poor kids
get caught in the firing line. The children serve as the battle prizes. Spoils
of war. A way for the parents to hurt each other. 1 was supposed to take the
side of whichever parent had legal custody. No one gave a damn about the kids
themselves.”
Maggie was silent. “I think I see
what you mean. It's not quite like it is in mystery novels, is it?”
“It damn sure isn't-At least, not most of the time. I
finally got smart and decided that since I wasn't going to be able to save the
weak and the innocent from the bad guys and since I seemed to have a talent for
the business, I might as well get into the end of it that paid well. A friend
of mine and I created Business Intelligence and Security, Inc. We got some
plush offices in downtown Seattle, hired a staff and went after corporate business.
The nice thing about white-collar crime is that there isn't so much emotion
involved. And hardly anyone gets killed.”
“I suppose there is a big demand for corporate security
consultants these days,” Maggie ventured.
“Yeah, and although I never thought I'd say it in the
old days, it's cleaner work than the kind of thing I used to do. Give me a nice
computer-fraud situation or a loading-dock security problem anytime.” Josh
stopped abruptly, shocked at how much he had told her.
He knew what had gotten him started. It was seeing in
her some of the same useless, naive nobility that he himself had once had. It
had goaded him into trying to tear the rose-colored glasses from her eyes.
“You know,” Maggie said quietly, “I didn't want to say
anything, but I have been wondering exactly why you took this case. Frankly, I
was surprised when your office called and said you were on your way.”
Josh eased his shoulder into a more comfortable
position and studied his throbbing ankle. “You weren't the only one.”
“BIS was the last company I expected to get a response
from. But I had tried every small agency in the Seattle phone book. No one was
willing to come out here to Peregrine manor in exchange for a month's free room
and
harshness in his own voice. “How the hell do you think I got started in this
business in the first place?”
“Because you wanted to rescue people?”
His jaw tightened. “When I first started, the last
thing I planned to do was create a corporation like Business Intelligence and
Security. I was just a one-man operation in the beginning. I had some damn fool
idea that I could help balance the scales of justice for those who couldn't do
it on their own. Like I said, I wanted to play Sir Galahad. I wanted to charge
off to protect those who couldn't protect themselves.”
“What happened?” she asked gently.
Josh wished he had never started this conversation.
But for some reason he couldn't seem to stop it now.
“What happened was that I eventually learned that it's
damn tough to play hero because it's often impossible to tell the bad guys from
the good guys. That's what happened.”
“I don't understand.”
“Hell, Maggie, during my first five years as an
investigator I took on every sob-story case that walked through my front door.
And none of them were what they seemed.”
“Tell me,” she whispered, her eyes wide and searching.
“You want to know what being a private eye is really
like?” he asked roughly. “I’ll tell you what it's like. Fathers asked me to
find their little lost girl. I'd track down the kid and discover that she had
run away from home because she was more afraid of being abused by her father
than she was of life on the streets.”
“Oh, Josh.”
“I'd find missing wives for distraught husbands, and
the wives would tell me they had gone into hiding because their husbands
routinely beat them and threatened to kill them. They'd beg me not to tell my
clients where they were.”
“How awful…”
“And then there were the child-custody cases,” he
continued, feeling savage. “Parents wage war with each other and the poor kids
get caught in the firing line. The children serve as the battle prizes. Spoils
of war. A way for the parents to hurt each other. 1 was supposed to take the
side of whichever parent had legal custody. No one gave a damn about the kids
themselves.”
Maggie was silent. “I think I see
what you mean. It's not quite like it is in mystery novels, is it?”
“It damn sure isn't-At least, not most of the time. I
finally got smart and decided that since I wasn't going to be able to save the
weak and the innocent from the bad guys and since I seemed to have a talent for
the business, I might as well get into the end of it that paid well. A friend
of mine and I created Business Intelligence and Security, Inc. We got some
plush offices in downtown Seattle, hired a staff and went after corporate business.
The nice thing about white-collar crime is that there isn't so much emotion
involved. And hardly anyone gets killed.”
“I suppose there is a big demand for corporate security
consultants these days,” Maggie ventured.
“Yeah, and although I never thought I'd say it in the
old days, it's cleaner work than the kind of thing I used to do. Give me a nice
computer-fraud situation or a loading-dock security problem anytime.” Josh
stopped abruptly, shocked at how much he had told her.
He knew what had gotten him started. It was seeing in
her some of the same useless, naive nobility that he himself had once had. It
had goaded him into trying to tear the rose-colored glasses from her eyes.
“You know,” Maggie said quietly, “I didn't want to say
anything, but I have been wondering exactly why you took this case. Frankly, I
was surprised when your office called and said you were on your way.”
Josh eased his shoulder into a more comfortable
position and studied his throbbing ankle. “You weren't the only one.”
“BIS was the last company I expected to get a response
from. But I had tried every small agency in the Seattle phone book. No one was
willing to come out here to Peregrine manor in exchange for a month's free room
and
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