at me under his ball cap the way only a thirteen-year-old can. “Mads, can’t you do anything right?”
My chest clenches and heat rises up my neck. I wait until the inning is over and then I rip my glove off and stalk to the side.
“I think I’m done,” I mutter loud enough for them to hear.
Ana leaves her position at first base and follows me to the front porch. We sit down side by side on the porch swing. She threads her arm through the crook of my elbow.
“Mads, just ignore Andrew. He’s a jerk. I saw what you did for Abbie. That was really nice of you.”
I turn to examine my best friend’s face and can’t help but mirror her smile. “Thanks. I couldn’t stand making a nine-year-old cry.”
Ana snuggles against me and leans her head against my shoulder. “You’re a good person, Mads, and you do a lot of things right. You play a rockin’ guitar and I know you can sing. You just need to show the rest of the world that drunk singing incident was just a fluke.”
I nod and lay my head on top of hers. “I guess you’re right. I don’t want to be seen by the world right now, though.” Ana just nods and lets the conversation fade.
About two minutes after that exchange, two rental cars pull up in the driveway. My heart falls into my stomach. It’s Dad and Cass…
And Jess and Raven.
They came all the way out here to get me. Dad and Cass I don’t mind, but the last people in the world I want to see right now are the ones I’m not sure I can trust.
I clench my fists at my sides as I stand from the swing and approach the steps to await the inevitable uproar. I know I screwed up by leaving like that, but when Grandmum didn’t stop me, I figured I was doing the right thing. The devastated look on my father’s face right now as he springs out of the driver’s side is absolutely making me question myself. He slams the car door shut and runs at full speed up the sidewalk to meet me. I cringe, but then he throws his arms around me and stifles a sob in my shoulder.
“Madison…sweetheart, what were you thinkin’? Flyin’ by yourself? You know how dangerous that could have been!”
“I…I just wanted to get out of everybody’s way—”
“Stop.” Dad jerks back and pins me by the shoulders. His brown eyes drill into mine. “Don’t you ever insinuate you are ‘ruinin’ my life’ or ‘in my way.’ You know you mean everything to me. I don’t give a shit what anyone else says.”
The waterworks start up again. I sniffle like a scolded kindergartener. “Dad, I’m sorry. I read the headlines and just panicked—”
“I know.” Dad pulls me back in and cradles me against his chest. “I’m sorry people are so cruel. I must have failed as a parent if you can’t see I would never hold this against you.”
“No…” I squeeze him back for all he’s worth. “It’s not your fault. I just don’t know if I can do this anymore.”
“Do what?”
“Be in the public eye. Open myself up for all the world to see.”
Dad smoothes my hair and kisses the top of my head. “Like I said before, we’ll do whatever you want to do. I’m just glad you’re safe. Don’t ever run away like that again, do you hear me?”
I nod against him and let the pain wash away in a flood of relief.
Chapter 9
August 17, 2015
Returning to L.A.
Things have been pretty peaceful here in Kentucky for the past week. The Lincourts enjoyed meeting Jess and Raven and Nana seems to have latched onto them already. In fact, it seems like she gets along with Raven better than she ever did with me. She clearly has no idea what she’s really like, but whatever keeps her off my case. I took advantage of the solitude to reconnect with Maggie and show her I still love her. I don’t know how I’m going to say goodbye again tomorrow. I can see in her eyes how much she’s missed me and how confused she is that I keep going away.
After a long talk with Dad, I decided I need to
My chest clenches and heat rises up my neck. I wait until the inning is over and then I rip my glove off and stalk to the side.
“I think I’m done,” I mutter loud enough for them to hear.
Ana leaves her position at first base and follows me to the front porch. We sit down side by side on the porch swing. She threads her arm through the crook of my elbow.
“Mads, just ignore Andrew. He’s a jerk. I saw what you did for Abbie. That was really nice of you.”
I turn to examine my best friend’s face and can’t help but mirror her smile. “Thanks. I couldn’t stand making a nine-year-old cry.”
Ana snuggles against me and leans her head against my shoulder. “You’re a good person, Mads, and you do a lot of things right. You play a rockin’ guitar and I know you can sing. You just need to show the rest of the world that drunk singing incident was just a fluke.”
I nod and lay my head on top of hers. “I guess you’re right. I don’t want to be seen by the world right now, though.” Ana just nods and lets the conversation fade.
About two minutes after that exchange, two rental cars pull up in the driveway. My heart falls into my stomach. It’s Dad and Cass…
And Jess and Raven.
They came all the way out here to get me. Dad and Cass I don’t mind, but the last people in the world I want to see right now are the ones I’m not sure I can trust.
I clench my fists at my sides as I stand from the swing and approach the steps to await the inevitable uproar. I know I screwed up by leaving like that, but when Grandmum didn’t stop me, I figured I was doing the right thing. The devastated look on my father’s face right now as he springs out of the driver’s side is absolutely making me question myself. He slams the car door shut and runs at full speed up the sidewalk to meet me. I cringe, but then he throws his arms around me and stifles a sob in my shoulder.
“Madison…sweetheart, what were you thinkin’? Flyin’ by yourself? You know how dangerous that could have been!”
“I…I just wanted to get out of everybody’s way—”
“Stop.” Dad jerks back and pins me by the shoulders. His brown eyes drill into mine. “Don’t you ever insinuate you are ‘ruinin’ my life’ or ‘in my way.’ You know you mean everything to me. I don’t give a shit what anyone else says.”
The waterworks start up again. I sniffle like a scolded kindergartener. “Dad, I’m sorry. I read the headlines and just panicked—”
“I know.” Dad pulls me back in and cradles me against his chest. “I’m sorry people are so cruel. I must have failed as a parent if you can’t see I would never hold this against you.”
“No…” I squeeze him back for all he’s worth. “It’s not your fault. I just don’t know if I can do this anymore.”
“Do what?”
“Be in the public eye. Open myself up for all the world to see.”
Dad smoothes my hair and kisses the top of my head. “Like I said before, we’ll do whatever you want to do. I’m just glad you’re safe. Don’t ever run away like that again, do you hear me?”
I nod against him and let the pain wash away in a flood of relief.
Chapter 9
August 17, 2015
Returning to L.A.
Things have been pretty peaceful here in Kentucky for the past week. The Lincourts enjoyed meeting Jess and Raven and Nana seems to have latched onto them already. In fact, it seems like she gets along with Raven better than she ever did with me. She clearly has no idea what she’s really like, but whatever keeps her off my case. I took advantage of the solitude to reconnect with Maggie and show her I still love her. I don’t know how I’m going to say goodbye again tomorrow. I can see in her eyes how much she’s missed me and how confused she is that I keep going away.
After a long talk with Dad, I decided I need to
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