Thunder? Lightning? Relentless rain? Oh, yeah! The dark, stormy night in the Land of Ooo created the perfect excuse for a couple of adventurers to lounge around in their treehouse and tell spooky stories.
Luckily, Jake’s talents went way beyond his ability to shape shift into any form imaginable. He was also a canine master of the tall tale.
‘…And as it waded through the carnage it had wrought,’ Jake creepily narrated his story to his hypnotized friend, Finn, ‘the vampire smashed their skulls – JUST FOR THE FUN OF IT! ’
‘No way!’ Finn gasped, staring at the red goo oozing out of the jam doughnut that Jake had just pounded.
‘Yes, way,’ Jake replied as he waved the dripping doughnut in Finn’s face.
‘The vampire hunched over its victims and breathed their vaporised blood mist,’ Jake continued.
‘Aw, Jeez,’ Finn protested. ‘Is this stuff you’re saying true? Or are you just trying to mess me up? You have to be honest.’
‘Oh, it’s true, man,’ Jake said, licking jam from his muzzle. ‘I heard it through a reliable source.’
‘Reliable?’ Finn repeated. ‘Rats.’
Finn crawled into his sleeping bag when Jake told him that his reliable source had also said that the very tree they were perched on was haunted.
‘Good night,’ Jake groaned in a ghostly voice. Then he disappeared, taking the only candle in the treehouse with him.
Finn tried to get comfortable in his sleeping bag, but it was an impossible task. The eerie glow of the moonlight made shadowy shapes on the treehouse walls. The wind rattled the tree’s branches, and a strange squeaking noise echoed through the room.
Finn looked down and was surprised to see a green-striped worm inching across his bed. The worm stood on its tail. Its head began to glow. Finn picked up a book and tossed it at the intruder.
‘No worms on the bed!’ he yelled. He then rolled to his side and tried to sleep. But just as he closed his eyes, he heard a tapping on the window. When Finn saw that it was just a tree branch, he breathed a sigh of relief – at least until the dark figure of a lady monster appeared below the branch.
Then Finn screamed.
‘Jake! Jake!’ Finn called, climbing down the ladder. ‘I saw someone outside the window! It must be the vampire, and I think we’re unprepared so I…’
‘Relax, buddy,’ Jake reassured his friend. ‘I made that story up. I was just trying to scare you.’
‘But you said you heard it from a reliable source,’ Finn reminded him.
‘I made that up, too,’ Jake laughed. ‘I was trying to scare you, and it worked.’
Suddenly, a clap of thunder boomed. A window burst open, and a gust of wind extinguished the flame on Jake’s candle. Now it was Jake’s turn to scream. And his scream was bloodcurdling.
Finn looked out the window.
‘No one’s outside,’ he observed. ‘It was just the wind, scaredy cat.’
‘I wasn’t scared. I was singing,’ Jake insisted. ‘I was singing my scream song.’
‘You’re a total wuss, man,’ Finn noted.
Suddenly, a duffel bag dropped to the floor in front of them.
‘Yikes!’ Finn yelled.
He shined his flashlight on the bag. It was small and green and didn’t look spooky or out-of-the-ordinary in any way. But that was only because Finn didn’t have any idea who the bag actually belonged to. It didn’t matter, though. As Finn raised his flashlight toward the wall, he was about to meet the bag’s owner. Unlike the bag, the owner was completely out-of-this-world!
When the beam of Finn’s flashlight reached the ceiling, the creature hovering there hissed and bared her pointed canine teeth. It looked like Jake’s reliable sources were reliable after all. The treehouse was haunted, and by a vampire, too.
‘Hey, guys, what’s up?’ the creature said cheerily to the shocked buddies. ‘I’m Marceline, the Vampire Queen.’
‘Are you going to smash my skull and breathe my blood mist?’ Finn asked, trembling.
‘Don’t suck
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