True Hollywood Lies

True Hollywood Lies by Josie Brown

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Authors: Josie Brown
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loose with an ear-to-ear grin.
    Very nice!
    I glanced away, but I couldn’t help but smile, too.
    “Ah, and finally, here is the most important lady in my life,” Louis declared with a flourish. He didn’t bother to get up, though. He just tapped the picture-in-picture feature on his remote control so that a Man Show wet T-shirt contest could be viewed at the same time as the boxing match.
    “For the next forty-eight hours, anyway,” Randy sneered.
    “Or, until Tatiana hears you’ve said so,” Bennett chimed in, then guffawed, as if he’d been auditioning for the role of class clown.
    “Don’t mind them, dearest. They’re just jealous because you’re not only capable but beautiful as well—whereas Ethan’s assistant is some techno-nerd like himself, T’s assistant is his very pregnant wife’s ever-watchful brother, Bennett’s girlfriend won’t let him have one of his own, Randy’s assistants are usually out the door in a minute and a half, or end up in the psych ward because he’s so abusive, and Mick doesn’t have the cash flow or the stature to rate his own Hannah. Well, that’s just too bad, eh? They’ll just have to admire you from afar.”
    From the looks on their faces, he’d gotten across his underlying message: Lay off; she’s all mine.
    “Besides,” Louis concluded, “ Someon e has to take care of my dirty laundry. Believe me, it’s not something Tatiana aspires to.”
    It was on the tip of my tongue to say, Guess what? It’s not what I aspire too, either! Instead I smiled benignly—and groaned inwardly: in my haste to make it to Genevieve’s before six, I had forgotten to drop his laundry at the dry cleaners. I made a mental note to myself to do so first thing in the morning, and to beg the clerk to have it back the same day. Of course, I would make up the difference and take the loss.
    This job was already costing me money!
    “Hannah, meet my guys: Bennett Fielding, Ethan Blount, T.H.E. Mann, Randy Zimmerman, and Mick Bradshaw.”
    I shivered at the sound of Motorcycle Guy’s real name. It was almost as if that charge I’d felt when he shook my hand on Laurel Canyon Boulevard had been reignited at the center of my spine, and, in a flash, had worked its way back up and somehow wound its way back into my heart.
    (Stop it, Hannah! He’s in Louis’s orbit, which means he’s out of your range).
    It took a moment, but I came to my senses and murmured a bright, “Nice to meet you all.” Before I could turn to leave, though, Randy drawled out, “Oh, I knowHannah. We’re old friends, ain’t we, sweet thang?”
    His suggestive tone raised the hairs on the back of my neck. Randy expected one of two reactions: for me to slink off because I was too embarrassed to answer him, or for me to be flattered that he wanted to hang out with his wang out.
    What, was he kidding? All his arrogance earned him from me was a look that should have turned him into a SnoCone.
    “Dude, that ain’t no way to treat a lady.” T.H.E. got up and proffered his hand. “These boys have the manners of a pack of hyenas. Don’t be giving ’em no mind, sweetie. And you can call me T, if I can call you Hannah.”
    “Thanks. Please do, and I’d be honored to do the same.” I smiled up at him, willing to forgive and forget all those nasty rumors about his having pistol-whipped the head of his music label as his way of expressing “disappointment” over the lack of promotion for his latest CD, or that, just a nanosecond before I’d entered the room, he had commented on how he’d like to “twang the G-string” belonging to the third contestant from the left.
    “You’ll have to excuse me. I’ve got to bring in the rest of the groceries.”
    “Need any help?” Mick asked nonchalantly enough, but he still had that shit-eating grin on his face, which made it all the more difficult for me to keep a silly smile off mine.
    “There are only four more bags,” I said hesitantly. ”It’s nothing,

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