“you also can’t do it on Allen.
Unless
you make Allen give you the bundle, and put the cash into the bank. If we shake him down, like we said we would do, and he pays us a million damned dollars, we got five grand a month for the rest of our lives, and the million still left at the end. And that, dear, is serious money.”
She sat up straight in the seat. She yawned. “Why is it you’re stealing this car?”
“Because I got to,” he said. “I don’t know what’s going on. My brother called me, and he said: ‘Go see this guy.’ And I said: ‘Who the fuck is he?’ And Donald said. ‘Look, you don’t wanna know. And if I did, I wouldn’t tell you. He’s a guy that a friend of mine knows, that he owes a damned favor to. So go down and see him, find out what he wants, and then do what he tells you, all right?’ And I go: ‘Well, how’s this involve me? Maybe he wants a guy killed.’ And Don goes: ‘Oh it’s nothing as heavy as that. This’s just kind of shady, and he needs it done, but not by a guy from down there. So, if you can do it, without fucking it up,just do it without fucking up. And if you can’t, call me back, and I’ll make some more calls. Inna meantime, just go and see him.’ And I say. ‘I’m not gonna do this. I don’t know what I’m doing. I don’t know who I’m doing it for. You can’t get me into this thing.’ And Donald says: ‘Look, have you got a record?’ I say: ‘Well, I did time.’ And Donald says: ‘Yeah, but you ain’t got a record. Keep in mind how come that is.’ ”
“It’s that politician up there,” she said.
“I assume so,” he said. “It must be. But I still don’t know why I’m doing this thing. I figure Ed Cobb’s behind it. My brother’n him’re like Siamese twins—but why Ed Cobb wants it done, I don’t know. All I do know’s that this guy Battles has got something on Ed Cobb, and Ed Cobb called my brother, and my brother called me. So Battles did something for one of them, once, or somebody that they like, and now he’s calling his marker. And it must’ve been something damned big, Battles did, if the bastard can get this much service.”
“Jesus,”
she said, “and you talk about
me?
Taking chances, I mean, and all that? I could get batted around by the wrong guy?
You
could go back to jail. And you’re doing what this fat shit tells you? Taking the car and just crushing it? You must be out of your mind. How much’re you getting for this?”
“Peace and quiet,” he said. “And some money, too. I’m not gonna crush the damned car.”
“You’re not,” she said.
“I’m not,” he said. “I have seen it. This is a prime Mercedes two-seater, worth about five or six K. One of those roadsters, robin’s-egg blue, and the seats’ve hardly been sat on. I’m gonna drive it up to Donald’s,have him put it on the lot, and some rich asshole’ll buy it.”
“And you think Donald’ll
do
this?” she said. “Thought you said he thinks you’re a crook.”
“I
know
he’ll do it,” Earl said. “That’s
why
he’ll do it. Donald’s very religious. Because he likes money, and there’s nothing that goes better together’n money and religion, except gin and vermouth. And I got a story he’ll go for right off. It’s close enough to robbing a bank so that, coming from me, he’ll believe it. I heard it from a lawyer that was on the bus with me. Going in for an estate thing that he sold some stuff himself, only the stuff went to friends that didn’t pay much money. ’Less you counted all the cash they gave to him and didn’t mention. I’m gonna tell him I’m getting the bill of sale sent. And as soon’s I get back to old Waldo’s joint there, and grab a clean one from him, you fill it out and I send it to Donald, and he sells the car free and easy.”
“Me?” she said. “Why me?”
“Because you’re a woman,” he said, “and I’m telling Donald that I got this car from a hooker that’s been shipped
Unless
you make Allen give you the bundle, and put the cash into the bank. If we shake him down, like we said we would do, and he pays us a million damned dollars, we got five grand a month for the rest of our lives, and the million still left at the end. And that, dear, is serious money.”
She sat up straight in the seat. She yawned. “Why is it you’re stealing this car?”
“Because I got to,” he said. “I don’t know what’s going on. My brother called me, and he said: ‘Go see this guy.’ And I said: ‘Who the fuck is he?’ And Donald said. ‘Look, you don’t wanna know. And if I did, I wouldn’t tell you. He’s a guy that a friend of mine knows, that he owes a damned favor to. So go down and see him, find out what he wants, and then do what he tells you, all right?’ And I go: ‘Well, how’s this involve me? Maybe he wants a guy killed.’ And Don goes: ‘Oh it’s nothing as heavy as that. This’s just kind of shady, and he needs it done, but not by a guy from down there. So, if you can do it, without fucking it up,just do it without fucking up. And if you can’t, call me back, and I’ll make some more calls. Inna meantime, just go and see him.’ And I say. ‘I’m not gonna do this. I don’t know what I’m doing. I don’t know who I’m doing it for. You can’t get me into this thing.’ And Donald says: ‘Look, have you got a record?’ I say: ‘Well, I did time.’ And Donald says: ‘Yeah, but you ain’t got a record. Keep in mind how come that is.’ ”
“It’s that politician up there,” she said.
“I assume so,” he said. “It must be. But I still don’t know why I’m doing this thing. I figure Ed Cobb’s behind it. My brother’n him’re like Siamese twins—but why Ed Cobb wants it done, I don’t know. All I do know’s that this guy Battles has got something on Ed Cobb, and Ed Cobb called my brother, and my brother called me. So Battles did something for one of them, once, or somebody that they like, and now he’s calling his marker. And it must’ve been something damned big, Battles did, if the bastard can get this much service.”
“Jesus,”
she said, “and you talk about
me?
Taking chances, I mean, and all that? I could get batted around by the wrong guy?
You
could go back to jail. And you’re doing what this fat shit tells you? Taking the car and just crushing it? You must be out of your mind. How much’re you getting for this?”
“Peace and quiet,” he said. “And some money, too. I’m not gonna crush the damned car.”
“You’re not,” she said.
“I’m not,” he said. “I have seen it. This is a prime Mercedes two-seater, worth about five or six K. One of those roadsters, robin’s-egg blue, and the seats’ve hardly been sat on. I’m gonna drive it up to Donald’s,have him put it on the lot, and some rich asshole’ll buy it.”
“And you think Donald’ll
do
this?” she said. “Thought you said he thinks you’re a crook.”
“I
know
he’ll do it,” Earl said. “That’s
why
he’ll do it. Donald’s very religious. Because he likes money, and there’s nothing that goes better together’n money and religion, except gin and vermouth. And I got a story he’ll go for right off. It’s close enough to robbing a bank so that, coming from me, he’ll believe it. I heard it from a lawyer that was on the bus with me. Going in for an estate thing that he sold some stuff himself, only the stuff went to friends that didn’t pay much money. ’Less you counted all the cash they gave to him and didn’t mention. I’m gonna tell him I’m getting the bill of sale sent. And as soon’s I get back to old Waldo’s joint there, and grab a clean one from him, you fill it out and I send it to Donald, and he sells the car free and easy.”
“Me?” she said. “Why me?”
“Because you’re a woman,” he said, “and I’m telling Donald that I got this car from a hooker that’s been shipped
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