beside me. I turned over and hugged my pillow, willing myself to forget at least for the rest of the night about the emptiness I felt in my heart.
THREE
On Sunday, I got up early. I dressed comfortably in my workout clothes. When Carson arrived, he called my cell phone, and I bounded down the stairs to meet him. I was so busy with the thought of helping him with the dance program I didn’t allow more than a moment’s thought of Matt. I didn’t want my heartache to take away from the volunteer work. Carson was committed to teaching, and at one time, we discussed teaching together. I’d given up dancing at the Conservatory when I was unable to keep myself injury free, and I was tired of working so hard to keep my weight down. I figured a better life would be to work in business. Carson and I were dance partners for three semesters. When I decided to stop dancing, I went to Vegas for a few of months to make fast money for tuition. My transcripts wouldn’t transfer to the local community college without paying off the remainder of the Conservatory’s tuition. I made enough to pay off my final tuition bill and the first year of business school. Despite leaving the Conservatory, Carson and I tried to maintain our friendship. We reconnected when I separated from my ex-husband, and has been an amazing friend.
“Hi, Love.” Carson said when I entered the fifteen passenger van. “Everybody, meet Perla. Perla, meet everybody.” I looked in the back and said ‘hello’ with a smile to the student dancers, making eye contact with a few. “I told them everything about you. And I’ll have you know these are the best of the best students and committed to bringing the arts to the underserved. You’ll get to know them today.” He complimented.
They looked so young and eager. I was happy to see their cheery, enthusiastic faces, and tried to be positive for them. “I need this’, I told myself over and over again. I couldn’t stay home for one more second, but I couldn’t be at work. Duration was where everything started. Well, at least where I thought everything started. There were too many memories of Matt. Everywhere I looked, I’d be reminded of him. I hated feeling like I’d never escape him. I experienced the same after Ben. There were so many memories to overcome. I couldn’t even spend time with friends because we shared years of the same friends, same places, and love of the same things. My time with Matt was short, and we didn’t gather a lot of memories of people, places, and things, but he was everywhere. Pentagon made sure of it.
“Are you alright, Love?”
I smiled at him with sincerity, “I am. Now, that I’m with you. Thanks for letting me tag along.” I replied.
“Good. You’ll have a great time. These kids are amazing. They’re so eager, Perlz. You won’t believe how much they know and how malleable they are. They learn fast.”
“When’s the performance?”
“Six weeks. We meet with them weekly on Sundays. They practice with their High School teachers during the school days.”
“What’s the end goal for them? Will they have a chance to audition for the conservatory?”
“Yes. The performance is a fund raiser for scholarships. We’re still trying to get a major donor. We have some donations, but the biggest thing is to market and sell tickets to the performance. There’s also a dinner dance afterwards. We could use as much money as we can. Do you know of any wealthy potential donors?” He lifted his eyebrow and looked at me. Then he returned to look at the road. When he looked back at me a split second later, I mouthed, ‘F-U!” He smirked.
We drove in comfortable silence for about forty minutes. The drive took the same route as Matt’s mansion. Again, I was faced with his presence. I inhaled.
“Still okay?”
“Yeah. The exit sign back there leads toward Matt’s mansion.” Carson pursed his lips, listening to my response.
“I know this is hard for you, but it will
THREE
On Sunday, I got up early. I dressed comfortably in my workout clothes. When Carson arrived, he called my cell phone, and I bounded down the stairs to meet him. I was so busy with the thought of helping him with the dance program I didn’t allow more than a moment’s thought of Matt. I didn’t want my heartache to take away from the volunteer work. Carson was committed to teaching, and at one time, we discussed teaching together. I’d given up dancing at the Conservatory when I was unable to keep myself injury free, and I was tired of working so hard to keep my weight down. I figured a better life would be to work in business. Carson and I were dance partners for three semesters. When I decided to stop dancing, I went to Vegas for a few of months to make fast money for tuition. My transcripts wouldn’t transfer to the local community college without paying off the remainder of the Conservatory’s tuition. I made enough to pay off my final tuition bill and the first year of business school. Despite leaving the Conservatory, Carson and I tried to maintain our friendship. We reconnected when I separated from my ex-husband, and has been an amazing friend.
“Hi, Love.” Carson said when I entered the fifteen passenger van. “Everybody, meet Perla. Perla, meet everybody.” I looked in the back and said ‘hello’ with a smile to the student dancers, making eye contact with a few. “I told them everything about you. And I’ll have you know these are the best of the best students and committed to bringing the arts to the underserved. You’ll get to know them today.” He complimented.
They looked so young and eager. I was happy to see their cheery, enthusiastic faces, and tried to be positive for them. “I need this’, I told myself over and over again. I couldn’t stay home for one more second, but I couldn’t be at work. Duration was where everything started. Well, at least where I thought everything started. There were too many memories of Matt. Everywhere I looked, I’d be reminded of him. I hated feeling like I’d never escape him. I experienced the same after Ben. There were so many memories to overcome. I couldn’t even spend time with friends because we shared years of the same friends, same places, and love of the same things. My time with Matt was short, and we didn’t gather a lot of memories of people, places, and things, but he was everywhere. Pentagon made sure of it.
“Are you alright, Love?”
I smiled at him with sincerity, “I am. Now, that I’m with you. Thanks for letting me tag along.” I replied.
“Good. You’ll have a great time. These kids are amazing. They’re so eager, Perlz. You won’t believe how much they know and how malleable they are. They learn fast.”
“When’s the performance?”
“Six weeks. We meet with them weekly on Sundays. They practice with their High School teachers during the school days.”
“What’s the end goal for them? Will they have a chance to audition for the conservatory?”
“Yes. The performance is a fund raiser for scholarships. We’re still trying to get a major donor. We have some donations, but the biggest thing is to market and sell tickets to the performance. There’s also a dinner dance afterwards. We could use as much money as we can. Do you know of any wealthy potential donors?” He lifted his eyebrow and looked at me. Then he returned to look at the road. When he looked back at me a split second later, I mouthed, ‘F-U!” He smirked.
We drove in comfortable silence for about forty minutes. The drive took the same route as Matt’s mansion. Again, I was faced with his presence. I inhaled.
“Still okay?”
“Yeah. The exit sign back there leads toward Matt’s mansion.” Carson pursed his lips, listening to my response.
“I know this is hard for you, but it will
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