Underwater by Maayan Nahmani

angry lately?” His voice cracked and he lowered his head, hiding the tear that fell down his cheek. He wasn’t fast enough. I saw. I felt a lump form in my throat.
    How could I keep lying to him about dad’s condition?
    “He and mom keep fighting all the time. I’m scared, and now he’s breaking stuff! Should we stay here? Should we go downstairs? I’m–”
    I cut him off by pulling his body against my chest and hugged him to me while rubbing his back with my hand up and down, slowly. God. This kid. I had no idea he was so aware of what was happening at home.
    I needed to keep him in the dark for a little while longer.
    Pulling back, I held his shoulders and looked into his tearful eyes.   “Everything will be alright. Trust me. They’ll stop fighting and he’ll eventually calm down. You shouldn’t be scared of Dad. He would never hurt you. Plus, I’m your big scary sister,” I winked. “You’re safe here with me.”
    Kissing the crown of his head, I pulled him back for another hug, rocking him back and forth until he calmed down. Reaching with my right hand for my iPhone that lay forgotten on the bed beside us, I brought it to me. I put one earbud in his left ear and then the second in my right. Searching through the list of songs on my playlist, I picked the one I was looking for and pressed play.
    Notes of Home’ by Phillip Philips blasted through our shared headphones and filled our ears with lighthearted melody while still hearing faint shouts in the background. I covered Adam’s right ear with my hand. Then, I closed my eyes and got lost with my little brother in the world I created just for us.
     

     
    Lifting my head off the wheel, I let out a deep sigh. I needed to stay focused in the present. Sad memories would only pull me under.
    I told myself that, but then again there was one thought that wouldn’t leave me alone. A certain blue-eyed man. I didn’t want to think about him. He scared me, and one of the reasons I decided to stay away from the support group center was him . Lettie was disappointed. She had hoped I would stick with it for a while, but no matter how much she tried, she couldn’t convince me to go back. I knew that if I ever saw him again, all I would want to do was help him. And crazy as it might sound – to hug him. I thought that he could really use one. He looked so wounded.
    I couldn’t help him, though. That was the main reason I stayed away. I barely could help my own family. Besides, I was pretty sure I was delusional and he didn’t really need my help. I didn’t know much about him, and had no clue what all those shady rumors about him said, but I was positive he had enough people on his side to help him through. And by his looks? Enough female company to keep him warm at night.
    A shot of anger passed through me, taking me off guard.
    What the hell? Why did I care?
    This guy was a mental case. I shouldn’t care. I wouldn’t care.
    Sighing, I grabbed my bag, got out from the car and closed the door. After locking it, I headed back to the house. Dread washed through me. The past few days hadn’t been easy. I felt suffocated in my own house. Watching them fight, watching my dad struggle. It had started to take its toll on me.
    Opening the door quietly, I entered the house, put my bag on the kitchen table and walked towards the living room, where I heard faint sounds of an argument.
    For the love of… not again .
    Turning the corner, I stopped dead in my tracks. My little brother was hiding behind a wall in front of the living room. He was listening quietly to my parents fight. I walked slowly until I stood behind him and tapped his shoulder. He jumped with a start and turned around. Not wanting my parents to hear our little exchange, I pulled him by the ear and up the stairs.
    Lucky for him, the little shit kept his mouth shut.
    After we entered my bedroom, I gave him a little shove toward my bed as I closed the door after us. Facing him, I crossed my arms