what I imagined getting hit by a car would be like. The impact is a shock, you’re frozen as everything seeps in, and by the time you realize what’s happening, it’s too late. Leela’s words resonated with me, as they usually do, and reality slowly sunk in. I did care about Dane, I might even love him.
The thought was absolutely and completely terrifying.
“I guess I should call him,” I admitted.
All Leela did was nod and give me a hug. She knew how difficult this would be for me, and got up to leave me with my thoughts.
“Hey, the reason I interrupted your sex session is because I wanted us to sign up for the self-defense class tonight. There’s one at 6 PM.”
Looking over her shoulder, she smiled widely, “I’m in, babe. Good luck with Dane-y boy.”
I shook my head at her cheesiness as she slipped out the door. I definitely needed luck. I paced my room as I went over a million different scenarios for our conversation. Things would either go wonderfully or end disastrously.
Both outcomes made me nauseous.
I finally grabbed Elle, squeezing her to my stomach, and dialed his number. After five torturous rings, his voicemail picked up. I hung up and flung the phone down in frustration. The man drove me insane and in the moment I wondered what the hell I was thinking, but I stopped myself, knowing too many thoughts would suppress my bravery. I would end up masking my feelings, and Dane would never know how I really felt.
I threw on some cuter clothes, pulled my hair away from my face, and went in search of Leela.
If Dane wanted rid of me, he would have to tell me to my face. Showing up unexpectedly wasn’t something I was accustomed to doing, but considering Dane’s behavior, I figured it was my only choice. I found Leela in the kitchen snacking on the breakfast I made.
She looked up, surprised, and said, “That was quick.”
I huffed in annoyance and explained the situation. She quickly agreed to accompany me, and rushed to finish dressing. I bounced back and forth, shifting my weight from one foot to another, as I waited. Patience wasn’t my strongest suit, and I knew it would only get worse. What if he wasn’t home? What if he didn’t want to see me? What if he told me to leave? The what if’s flew through my brain, clouding my thoughts and causing doubt to spread deeper.
Leela emerged and wagged her finger at me. “Don’t do what I think you’re doing, Korah,” she scolded. “I know how you get. This is a good idea. The only reason he’s acting this way is because he’s embarrassed. You march right up to his room and set his ass straight.”
I nodded and she grabbed her keys. Fear paralyzed me. I stood in my kitchen, my chest rising quickly as my breathing became heavier. I licked my lips and gulped a few times. In true Leela fashion, she rolled her eyes, grabbed me by the wrist, and dragged me along.
###
The frat house looked different without the abundance of decorations and empty liquor bottles all over the yard. Leela ushered me out of the vehicle, giving words of wisdom and good luck wishes as I moved as slowly as a turtle to get out. I dragged my feet to the door, longing to go back in time and change my mind, but knowing it was impossible.
Lifting my fist to knock, I was startled when the door flew open and a crowd of brothers came tumbling out. Gasping, I stepped back, barely removing myself from their path. They called sorries and instructed me on in, one of them eyeing me and giving a suggestive smile and wink before dashing away.
Why did I come here?
The inside was as massive as I recalled. No one was around, so I inched my way up the staircase, stopping to inspect the spot where the root of Dane’s, and in consequence my, problems took place. The splintered wood had rained down over the steps, flakes still stuck to them, while the rest was showered along the floor directly beneath. I imagined how the scene played out, my heart hammering at the thought of Dane
The thought was absolutely and completely terrifying.
“I guess I should call him,” I admitted.
All Leela did was nod and give me a hug. She knew how difficult this would be for me, and got up to leave me with my thoughts.
“Hey, the reason I interrupted your sex session is because I wanted us to sign up for the self-defense class tonight. There’s one at 6 PM.”
Looking over her shoulder, she smiled widely, “I’m in, babe. Good luck with Dane-y boy.”
I shook my head at her cheesiness as she slipped out the door. I definitely needed luck. I paced my room as I went over a million different scenarios for our conversation. Things would either go wonderfully or end disastrously.
Both outcomes made me nauseous.
I finally grabbed Elle, squeezing her to my stomach, and dialed his number. After five torturous rings, his voicemail picked up. I hung up and flung the phone down in frustration. The man drove me insane and in the moment I wondered what the hell I was thinking, but I stopped myself, knowing too many thoughts would suppress my bravery. I would end up masking my feelings, and Dane would never know how I really felt.
I threw on some cuter clothes, pulled my hair away from my face, and went in search of Leela.
If Dane wanted rid of me, he would have to tell me to my face. Showing up unexpectedly wasn’t something I was accustomed to doing, but considering Dane’s behavior, I figured it was my only choice. I found Leela in the kitchen snacking on the breakfast I made.
She looked up, surprised, and said, “That was quick.”
I huffed in annoyance and explained the situation. She quickly agreed to accompany me, and rushed to finish dressing. I bounced back and forth, shifting my weight from one foot to another, as I waited. Patience wasn’t my strongest suit, and I knew it would only get worse. What if he wasn’t home? What if he didn’t want to see me? What if he told me to leave? The what if’s flew through my brain, clouding my thoughts and causing doubt to spread deeper.
Leela emerged and wagged her finger at me. “Don’t do what I think you’re doing, Korah,” she scolded. “I know how you get. This is a good idea. The only reason he’s acting this way is because he’s embarrassed. You march right up to his room and set his ass straight.”
I nodded and she grabbed her keys. Fear paralyzed me. I stood in my kitchen, my chest rising quickly as my breathing became heavier. I licked my lips and gulped a few times. In true Leela fashion, she rolled her eyes, grabbed me by the wrist, and dragged me along.
###
The frat house looked different without the abundance of decorations and empty liquor bottles all over the yard. Leela ushered me out of the vehicle, giving words of wisdom and good luck wishes as I moved as slowly as a turtle to get out. I dragged my feet to the door, longing to go back in time and change my mind, but knowing it was impossible.
Lifting my fist to knock, I was startled when the door flew open and a crowd of brothers came tumbling out. Gasping, I stepped back, barely removing myself from their path. They called sorries and instructed me on in, one of them eyeing me and giving a suggestive smile and wink before dashing away.
Why did I come here?
The inside was as massive as I recalled. No one was around, so I inched my way up the staircase, stopping to inspect the spot where the root of Dane’s, and in consequence my, problems took place. The splintered wood had rained down over the steps, flakes still stuck to them, while the rest was showered along the floor directly beneath. I imagined how the scene played out, my heart hammering at the thought of Dane
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