especially on days like today where the sun is shining and the weather is nice.
We walk in silence. I don’t notice her tension at first, but then I see how her lips turn down at the corners, and her shoulders are rigid.
I suddenly want to talk, to say anything to break the uncomfortable nothingness between us.
Should I tell her about the strange lights I saw in the sky? But then I’d have to explain why I went to the levies in the first place. I think of telling her about Ava’s brother, but that opens up a whole new set of questions I don’t have answers for. When did I start keeping so many secrets from my best friend? A lump grows in my stomach. I don’t like this feeling at all.
Then I think of something I can tell her. “I’m meeting this guy.”
Jamie stops right in the middle of the sidewalk. Her eyebrows knit together and a deep frown mars her pretty face. “Huh?”
I glance around, suddenly self-conscience about the news. I propel her forward. “The medic I told you about from the hospital. I’m going to meet him.”
Jamie doesn’t say anything at first. I watch questions and judgments and emotions play through her blue eyes as she walks. Her eyes are cornflower blue—so light you want to go swimming in them. It’s no wonder this Easton guy is hooked.
And that’s why I know I can tell her about this. I keep her secret, she keeps mine.
“I thought you said it was nothing between you. You said you hadn’t forgotten about Keegan.”
“It’s not like that. We’re not meeting romantically. It’s more like he’s doing me a favor.”
I remember his reference to God and I frown. I’m not sure how much of a favor it will be, but if he knows anything about chemo then I want to know, and if he knows anything about a real God, I want to know that, too.
Jamie cuts her eyes at me. “A favor? What is that supposed to mean?”
Maybe I shouldn’t have brought it up, because now I’ll have to go into those other subjects I didn’t want to talk about. How much will I have to explain to help her understand? It’s not that I don’t trust her with the information, just that it all sounds crazy, and she already thought I was blowing the chemotherapy situation out of proportion.
I look around again. A few kids play in their yards, and a guard across the street waves at us. I smile and wave back. We’re almost to the market.
“Do you remember what I told you about the chemo drugs?” I whisper.
She nods.
“The doctors requested them. I saw it on her chart. I was digging through her chart again, to see if they were approved yet. Fischer caught me looking, and he told me he could give me answers.”
Her suspicious look doesn’t fade like I’d hoped it would. “Fischer? That’s his name?”
“Yeah.”
Jamie sighs. “Are you sure he’s not just trying to get you alone?”
“No!” I say it too loudly and glance around again. I’m paranoid, as if the guard from the other night has been following me around, hoping to catch me break another rule. She did say they’d be watching.
“He’s not,” I say more quietly. “I just want to know more about the drugs. Maybe he knows how we can get some.”
Jamie doesn’t stop frowning, but we’re at the market now so our conversation stops.
12
Tables of succulent fruits and vegetables line one side of the square-shaped outdoor market. It’s set up in what used to be an old parking lot, with different sections for different food types. “I’m starving,” I say, fingering a ripe peach. “I skipped lunch.”
“Get one,” Jamie says, glancing around. She seems distracted.
“My dad would probably have a heart attack if I even thought about eating a fruit he didn’t grow.” We both laugh, probably because we can both picture it.
I head to the grains instead. Sugars, flours, salts, and other spices and baking contents fill two tables. I stock up on flour and yeast, even though I can’t help looking at the brown
We walk in silence. I don’t notice her tension at first, but then I see how her lips turn down at the corners, and her shoulders are rigid.
I suddenly want to talk, to say anything to break the uncomfortable nothingness between us.
Should I tell her about the strange lights I saw in the sky? But then I’d have to explain why I went to the levies in the first place. I think of telling her about Ava’s brother, but that opens up a whole new set of questions I don’t have answers for. When did I start keeping so many secrets from my best friend? A lump grows in my stomach. I don’t like this feeling at all.
Then I think of something I can tell her. “I’m meeting this guy.”
Jamie stops right in the middle of the sidewalk. Her eyebrows knit together and a deep frown mars her pretty face. “Huh?”
I glance around, suddenly self-conscience about the news. I propel her forward. “The medic I told you about from the hospital. I’m going to meet him.”
Jamie doesn’t say anything at first. I watch questions and judgments and emotions play through her blue eyes as she walks. Her eyes are cornflower blue—so light you want to go swimming in them. It’s no wonder this Easton guy is hooked.
And that’s why I know I can tell her about this. I keep her secret, she keeps mine.
“I thought you said it was nothing between you. You said you hadn’t forgotten about Keegan.”
“It’s not like that. We’re not meeting romantically. It’s more like he’s doing me a favor.”
I remember his reference to God and I frown. I’m not sure how much of a favor it will be, but if he knows anything about chemo then I want to know, and if he knows anything about a real God, I want to know that, too.
Jamie cuts her eyes at me. “A favor? What is that supposed to mean?”
Maybe I shouldn’t have brought it up, because now I’ll have to go into those other subjects I didn’t want to talk about. How much will I have to explain to help her understand? It’s not that I don’t trust her with the information, just that it all sounds crazy, and she already thought I was blowing the chemotherapy situation out of proportion.
I look around again. A few kids play in their yards, and a guard across the street waves at us. I smile and wave back. We’re almost to the market.
“Do you remember what I told you about the chemo drugs?” I whisper.
She nods.
“The doctors requested them. I saw it on her chart. I was digging through her chart again, to see if they were approved yet. Fischer caught me looking, and he told me he could give me answers.”
Her suspicious look doesn’t fade like I’d hoped it would. “Fischer? That’s his name?”
“Yeah.”
Jamie sighs. “Are you sure he’s not just trying to get you alone?”
“No!” I say it too loudly and glance around again. I’m paranoid, as if the guard from the other night has been following me around, hoping to catch me break another rule. She did say they’d be watching.
“He’s not,” I say more quietly. “I just want to know more about the drugs. Maybe he knows how we can get some.”
Jamie doesn’t stop frowning, but we’re at the market now so our conversation stops.
12
Tables of succulent fruits and vegetables line one side of the square-shaped outdoor market. It’s set up in what used to be an old parking lot, with different sections for different food types. “I’m starving,” I say, fingering a ripe peach. “I skipped lunch.”
“Get one,” Jamie says, glancing around. She seems distracted.
“My dad would probably have a heart attack if I even thought about eating a fruit he didn’t grow.” We both laugh, probably because we can both picture it.
I head to the grains instead. Sugars, flours, salts, and other spices and baking contents fill two tables. I stock up on flour and yeast, even though I can’t help looking at the brown
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