window.
‘This is going to be a tantric experience; it will elevate your eighth
chakra
and will give you a nirvana-like spiritual experience!’
‘Spiritual experience?’ Simi said, because she felt she should say something.
‘Yep, an earth-shattering, powerful union of two bodies where they cease to exist individually and merge to become one,’ Namit said, sensually kissing her lips.
He must have had dal for lunch!
— is all she could think.
Simi’s eyes were shut tight. She wasn’t sure what was going on. Did sex just happen? She couldn’t tell. Wasn’t she supposed to feel nice? She felt nice. Or did she? She couldn’t tell.
Two minutes had gone by. She opened her eyes. Namit was grinning at her.
‘So?’ he asked expectantly. He was sure acting like it was over.
Was that it?
Simi was contemplating her response, when Namit suddenly freaked out. ‘Oh shit, oh shit!’
‘What? WHAT?’ Simi was speculating about whether the condom had split.
Oh Lord!
‘You broke the glass!’ he screamed.
‘What?’ she asked loudly.
‘In the heat of passion you must’ve kicked your legs hard — look the window is broken!’
‘Namit, I … I …’
Namit was outside the car by now freaking out. Simi quickly got dressed.
‘Shit, shit! My dad’s going to kill me!’ Namit started wiping the glass out from the back seat.
Simi was not sure if the glass was broken “in the heat of passion” as Namit suggested, because she had felt no heat and certainly no passion. But she felt guilty.
‘I am sorry, Namit.’
‘Papa is going to be back tomorrow from Mumbai. He cannot see this, we have to fix it!’
Namit was already back in the driver’s seat. Simi got in. The drive back to her Kinetic was awkward. He was mad and scared; she was not even able to process what happened. Was she still a virgin or did she just lose it? She didn’t feel any pain; she was feeling the same as before. She couldn’t tell. What she was feeling for sure was guilt and shame. She was feeling dirty and wasregretting even contemplating losing her virginity. She should have waited until her wedding night to do it, like other nice girls in India.
But, really, these days, who is still a virgin when they get married? Even in India?
Nobody she knew was a virgin. And her friends
claimed
they were not. How could she be the only naïve one and such a loser for not even doing it once? Simi told herself, at least for now, that she could lie about losing it, even though the more she rubbed her thighs together to see if she could tell, the more convinced she was that she was still as virginal as virgins come. But still, she felt like a slut when she realized that she could have made Namit work a little harder to get into her pants.
Tch.
‘Namit, you get it fixed and I’ll pay for it, OK? she told him when he dropped her off. ‘I’ll give you the money!’
It was just a polite offer. Namit didn’t question it.
‘OK,’ he said quickly before he put the car into gear and he was gone.
Minutes later
Simi was nearing home.
Does it happen this way to all the girls? Two fucking minutes! Or two minutes fucking to be precise! Is this as good as it is going to get?
She wanted to get home and take a bath and wash off yet another disappointing episode from her life. But when she got there, the
cylinderwala
was standing outside waiting for her.
‘
Kya
, madam? I am waiting here for thirty minutes. Why don’t you give money to Aunty? Every time same story!’ he angrily told her.
Simi let him in and the cylinders were exchanged. She tipped him ten rupees and he was mad enough not to argue. He was just leaving when her mother started to explain her standing in the matter.
‘
Bhaiyya
, don’t feel bad, huh; I don’t feel safe when I am alone and a strange man visits, so I asked you to wait outside. I asked you if you wanted water as well, but you didn’t. Please don’t feel bad, huh, I am not saying you are a bad man!’ she said in
‘This is going to be a tantric experience; it will elevate your eighth
chakra
and will give you a nirvana-like spiritual experience!’
‘Spiritual experience?’ Simi said, because she felt she should say something.
‘Yep, an earth-shattering, powerful union of two bodies where they cease to exist individually and merge to become one,’ Namit said, sensually kissing her lips.
He must have had dal for lunch!
— is all she could think.
Simi’s eyes were shut tight. She wasn’t sure what was going on. Did sex just happen? She couldn’t tell. Wasn’t she supposed to feel nice? She felt nice. Or did she? She couldn’t tell.
Two minutes had gone by. She opened her eyes. Namit was grinning at her.
‘So?’ he asked expectantly. He was sure acting like it was over.
Was that it?
Simi was contemplating her response, when Namit suddenly freaked out. ‘Oh shit, oh shit!’
‘What? WHAT?’ Simi was speculating about whether the condom had split.
Oh Lord!
‘You broke the glass!’ he screamed.
‘What?’ she asked loudly.
‘In the heat of passion you must’ve kicked your legs hard — look the window is broken!’
‘Namit, I … I …’
Namit was outside the car by now freaking out. Simi quickly got dressed.
‘Shit, shit! My dad’s going to kill me!’ Namit started wiping the glass out from the back seat.
Simi was not sure if the glass was broken “in the heat of passion” as Namit suggested, because she had felt no heat and certainly no passion. But she felt guilty.
‘I am sorry, Namit.’
‘Papa is going to be back tomorrow from Mumbai. He cannot see this, we have to fix it!’
Namit was already back in the driver’s seat. Simi got in. The drive back to her Kinetic was awkward. He was mad and scared; she was not even able to process what happened. Was she still a virgin or did she just lose it? She didn’t feel any pain; she was feeling the same as before. She couldn’t tell. What she was feeling for sure was guilt and shame. She was feeling dirty and wasregretting even contemplating losing her virginity. She should have waited until her wedding night to do it, like other nice girls in India.
But, really, these days, who is still a virgin when they get married? Even in India?
Nobody she knew was a virgin. And her friends
claimed
they were not. How could she be the only naïve one and such a loser for not even doing it once? Simi told herself, at least for now, that she could lie about losing it, even though the more she rubbed her thighs together to see if she could tell, the more convinced she was that she was still as virginal as virgins come. But still, she felt like a slut when she realized that she could have made Namit work a little harder to get into her pants.
Tch.
‘Namit, you get it fixed and I’ll pay for it, OK? she told him when he dropped her off. ‘I’ll give you the money!’
It was just a polite offer. Namit didn’t question it.
‘OK,’ he said quickly before he put the car into gear and he was gone.
Minutes later
Simi was nearing home.
Does it happen this way to all the girls? Two fucking minutes! Or two minutes fucking to be precise! Is this as good as it is going to get?
She wanted to get home and take a bath and wash off yet another disappointing episode from her life. But when she got there, the
cylinderwala
was standing outside waiting for her.
‘
Kya
, madam? I am waiting here for thirty minutes. Why don’t you give money to Aunty? Every time same story!’ he angrily told her.
Simi let him in and the cylinders were exchanged. She tipped him ten rupees and he was mad enough not to argue. He was just leaving when her mother started to explain her standing in the matter.
‘
Bhaiyya
, don’t feel bad, huh; I don’t feel safe when I am alone and a strange man visits, so I asked you to wait outside. I asked you if you wanted water as well, but you didn’t. Please don’t feel bad, huh, I am not saying you are a bad man!’ she said in
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