A Highly Unlikely Scenario, or a Neetsa Pizza Employee's Guide to Saving the World by Rachel Cantor

tale, we sleep on the deck of the ship separated only by a sword (dulled, of course, in bloody battle), and that in the midst of a squall, when it seemed we might die—but it is too despicable!
    He has gone too far! Leonard said.
    I drowned his vellum in the piss pot, I had no choice, but the man is crazed, he says he does not need me. Did he need KingArthur’s approval to write about him? Oh, Leonard, what shall I do? If the world believes I have betrayed my sovereign, I shall never work again!
    Your sovereign?
    The Great Khan.
    Well, that’s it, isn’t it? Remind Rusty that you work for a king. He’s impressed by that sort of thing, right?
    He knows I was frequently sent on missions by Kubilai, that we conversed often about what I saw when I returned.
    Tell him more. Tell him you were a minister in his government, a Deputy Leader or something.
    I do not know what position that might be, but I understand the spirit of your suggestion. You wish me to lie, dear Leonard?
    Not lie, exactly. More like a metaphor: invent a position that captures the high esteem in which you were held. The position then becomes a symbol that expresses the truth of your relationship. See what I mean?
    Your mind is subtle. I did offer invaluable assistance to the Great Khan in matters of salt …
    Think bigger, Leonard said.
    Nothing is bigger than salt! Mill said.
    Sometimes Leonard forgot whom he was talking to.
    Right, Leonard said. Then make yourself the senator of salt, if that does it.
    I shall call myself Chief Emissary of Salt!
    No, Leonard said. You must be at least a governor. Chief emissary is not enough.
    The governor of Yang-chau! Mill said. I was there for a time. You know, they use paper lucre in Yang-chau.
    That’s a start, Leonard said. But we need something more.Rusty’s a war nut, right? Tell him about your fierce battles, tell him you killed many warriors with your bare hands. Make him fear you.
    But I have killed no one! Even the galley I commanded at Curzola was captured before we laid eyes on the enemy.
    Find a way to make the statement symbolically correct.
    I understand you, dear Leonard! I understand you. I heard someone speak once of deadly trebuchets …
    Excellent! Leonard said.
A compromise
    Rustichello and I have come to an understanding, Mill said the next night. He will destroy all tales of Kokachin, and I will allow him leeway on matters related to war and wealth. I have told him that humility prohibits me from speaking at length about my governorship or about my role in breaking the siege of Siang-yang-fu; he may mention these facts but I will not elaborate. Your advice, dear Leonard, has saved my reputation and that of Kokachin. Please, tell me if there is anything I may do for you—absolutely anything! When I am released I will speak to the officials who imprison you! I shall be rich then and all will know me. I will hire you as my advisor—you shall meet the Great Khan!
    I’m good where I am, Leonard said.
    I daresay you are not! Mill replied. But I have never asked: How is it that you have learned this mystical connection? You know that I have learned it from … well, you know from whom I have learned it. I recall well the days in that arid land. Youknow I met others there from Italy, though they did not travel there by ship. One, a Spaniard from Saragossa, had settled in Sicily. He was a Jew, with a Jew man’s beard and puzzling paraphernalia. He was freakishly tall and had a pronounced gap between his teeth. He juggled letters in the air. Look, he’d say, look! The letters are dancing!
    Dancing? Leonard asked. The letters were dancing?
    Letters are insubstantial, I know, but in that unusual place many things were possible.
    Dancing? Leonard asked. Did you say they were dancing?
    Another man arrived, a Greek obsessed with mathematics. He had settled in Crotone …
    Like Pythagoras, Leonard murmured.
    I believe that was his name! Mill