belly. The scar looked like an upside down T .
I reached out to touch it. When my finger touched Wanna, she jumped back a little. I looked into her eyes and she nodded that it was ok. So I reached out again and touched the scar from beginning to end. Wanna’s skin was warm from the fire and the scar felt hot.
I said— Does it hurt?
She said— Not anymore.
I said— I have my monthly bleeding.
Wanna stood there with her scar still revealed to me, and she said—
I know. It is called your period.
Then she wrapped her arms around me, and her shirt draped over my head. My ear pressed into her skin, and I could hear her heart beating. She held on tight and we stood there like that for a minute. Wanna was holding on so tight that it seemed like I better hold on too, so I wrapped my arms around her waist and squeezed.
And then we both cried. For a long time we cried.
89
Dear Penny,
I asked Wanna if I could take my blue bottle and drink my milk next to the willow tree. Nobody can see me through the branches. It is warm and bright today but cool under the willow.
Last night I had a dream about the Mean Boy. It wasn’t scary, it was just strange.
In my dream I found the Mean Boy sitting outside the orphanage. I didn’t understand why he was there, because he was adopted a few months before me. Why would he come back?
I remember the day he was adopted, and I remember his new family. He was so proud of them. They were a big family with five children already. The Mean Boy was child number six. Two of his sisters were Chinese, and the three boys looked like the parents. The Mean Boy walked around the orphanage and told his family about all his friends. Friends? The Mean Boy didn’t have any real friends, just people who did what he said because they were scared of him. Behind his back children would make fun of him and make fun of his half arm. If the Mean Boy found out that someone was making fun of his arm, then that person would be covered with bruises.
The day that Mean Boy was adopted, his face was one big smile. He looked happy. But in my dream he was sad. He said that he came back to get his baton and marching band costume. Why? —I said.
The Mean Boy said that his new family didn’t believe him when he told them that he was important at the orphanage, that he was a leader, that he could make people listen and listen good. He told me that his new family didn’t give him the respect that he deserved. So he came back to get his things and to take them home to show his family.
I asked the Mean Boy if I could touch his arm. He wasn’t mean anymore, just sad, so he said yes. It was smooth and felt hot. I asked him if it hurt. He said not on the outside, but on the inside. He asked me if I hurt on the outside or inside, which was a strange question because there is nothing wrong with me on the outside.
I don’t remember what I told him.
90
Dear Penny,
I saw Jazz at the ice cream parlor today. She looked pretty. I think she was wearing more makeup today because she has a boyfriend. He comes in to see her at work all the time. His name is Lex, and he is definitely who I would pick for a boyfriend. Lex is tall and has dark hair like Daddy. He is very nice to Jazz and makes her laugh and smile. Even when Jazz is making my ice cream or talking to another costumer, she is always watching Lex. They say silly things to each other and whisper in each other’s ear.
Daddy doesn’t act that way with Wanna. He never makes Wanna laugh, and he definitely does not whisper sweet things in her ear. They are not talking very much, at least not as much as they used to. When Daddy and Wanna would walk to the lake, they used to hold hands. They don’t anymore. Daddy is working in his office more than he used to, and I never see him except when it is time for dinner and sometimes not even then. Sometimes I don’t see him until I am getting ready for bed.
I don’t know exactly what is going on, but I am trying to figure it
I reached out to touch it. When my finger touched Wanna, she jumped back a little. I looked into her eyes and she nodded that it was ok. So I reached out again and touched the scar from beginning to end. Wanna’s skin was warm from the fire and the scar felt hot.
I said— Does it hurt?
She said— Not anymore.
I said— I have my monthly bleeding.
Wanna stood there with her scar still revealed to me, and she said—
I know. It is called your period.
Then she wrapped her arms around me, and her shirt draped over my head. My ear pressed into her skin, and I could hear her heart beating. She held on tight and we stood there like that for a minute. Wanna was holding on so tight that it seemed like I better hold on too, so I wrapped my arms around her waist and squeezed.
And then we both cried. For a long time we cried.
89
Dear Penny,
I asked Wanna if I could take my blue bottle and drink my milk next to the willow tree. Nobody can see me through the branches. It is warm and bright today but cool under the willow.
Last night I had a dream about the Mean Boy. It wasn’t scary, it was just strange.
In my dream I found the Mean Boy sitting outside the orphanage. I didn’t understand why he was there, because he was adopted a few months before me. Why would he come back?
I remember the day he was adopted, and I remember his new family. He was so proud of them. They were a big family with five children already. The Mean Boy was child number six. Two of his sisters were Chinese, and the three boys looked like the parents. The Mean Boy walked around the orphanage and told his family about all his friends. Friends? The Mean Boy didn’t have any real friends, just people who did what he said because they were scared of him. Behind his back children would make fun of him and make fun of his half arm. If the Mean Boy found out that someone was making fun of his arm, then that person would be covered with bruises.
The day that Mean Boy was adopted, his face was one big smile. He looked happy. But in my dream he was sad. He said that he came back to get his baton and marching band costume. Why? —I said.
The Mean Boy said that his new family didn’t believe him when he told them that he was important at the orphanage, that he was a leader, that he could make people listen and listen good. He told me that his new family didn’t give him the respect that he deserved. So he came back to get his things and to take them home to show his family.
I asked the Mean Boy if I could touch his arm. He wasn’t mean anymore, just sad, so he said yes. It was smooth and felt hot. I asked him if it hurt. He said not on the outside, but on the inside. He asked me if I hurt on the outside or inside, which was a strange question because there is nothing wrong with me on the outside.
I don’t remember what I told him.
90
Dear Penny,
I saw Jazz at the ice cream parlor today. She looked pretty. I think she was wearing more makeup today because she has a boyfriend. He comes in to see her at work all the time. His name is Lex, and he is definitely who I would pick for a boyfriend. Lex is tall and has dark hair like Daddy. He is very nice to Jazz and makes her laugh and smile. Even when Jazz is making my ice cream or talking to another costumer, she is always watching Lex. They say silly things to each other and whisper in each other’s ear.
Daddy doesn’t act that way with Wanna. He never makes Wanna laugh, and he definitely does not whisper sweet things in her ear. They are not talking very much, at least not as much as they used to. When Daddy and Wanna would walk to the lake, they used to hold hands. They don’t anymore. Daddy is working in his office more than he used to, and I never see him except when it is time for dinner and sometimes not even then. Sometimes I don’t see him until I am getting ready for bed.
I don’t know exactly what is going on, but I am trying to figure it
Similar Books
