Barfing in the Backseat by Henry Winkler, Lin Oliver Page B

that,” I said to him. “Get your tired butt off that bed. We have a mission to accomplish.”
    “What now, Zip?” Frankie said.
    “We’ve got to talk to Jimmy Jim before dinner and let him know there’s a package arriving for me tomorrow morning.”
    “Good thought, dude,” Frankie said. “We should tell him not to tell your dad. And leave him some money for the delivery.”
    “Do you think five dollars will cover it?” I asked. “It’s all I have.”
    Frankie took a deep breath, reached into his pocket, and pulled out a twenty dollar bill.
    “This was supposed to be for my University of North Carolina hat,” he said with a sigh. “But I don’t look good in blue, anyway.”
    “I’ll make it up to you, Frankie. I swear.”
    I knocked on my parents’ door to tell them we were going exploring and we’d meet them at dinner. I was worried that Emily would want to come, but she was busy making Katherine a bed out of the cotton balls and Q-tips that were in the bathroom.
    “I’m sorry you can’t leave the room, Kathy,” I heard her saying. “But Mommy’s going to make you all comfy and safe.”
    Could you just throw up?
    We headed right to the office. No one was there, but there was a sign over the front desk that said buzzzzzzzz for service.
    Of course it said that.
    We buzzed and buzzed, but still, no service.
    Come on, Jimmy Jim. This is no time for you to disappear!

W E WAITED FOR A FEW SECONDS, then buzzed again. Finally, a voice called out.
    “Back here, in the kitchen.”
    Frankie and I walked around the front desk and crossed through the office. We had to be careful not to knock over the bear-shaped and bee-shaped jars of honey that were on display. In back of the office was a big old kitchen. Jimmy Jim was at the stove, standing next to a tall, blond woman who was wearing the same bee overalls as he was.
    “Hey, boys, meet my wife, Honey,” he said, pointing to the woman who was pulling a big pan of corn bread out of the oven.
    “Your name is actually Honey?” I asked. I hoped that didn’t seem rude, but the words flew out of my mouth before I could stop them.
    “It took me quite a while to find her,” JimmyJim said. “I met a lot of Barbaras and Susans, but then one night at the red barn dance, I saw her standing at the punch bowl. I offered to pour her a cup of punch, but when she said she preferred iced tea with honey, I knew she was the girl for me.”
    “My name was actually Henrietta, but I never liked it much,” Honey said. “I had it legally changed to Honey as a wedding present for my Jimmy Jim.”
    “I hope we’re not disturbing you,” I said, getting right to business, “but we have something very important to talk to you about.”
    “It concerns a package coming through the U.S. mail,” Frankie said. I could tell he was trying to sound urgent. And it worked, because Jimmy Jim turned away from the frying chicken and faced us.
    “Okay, boys, you got my ear. In fact, you got both of them.”
    “And mine, too,” Honey chimed in. “That makes four ears.”
    “We’re expecting a package to arrive tomorrow morning addressed to me,” I explained. “It’s really important that no one sees thatpackage but me.”
    “Specifically, Hank’s dad, Mr. Zipzer, is not to know about the package,” Frankie said. “It’s strictly confidential.”
    Jimmy Jim raised an eyebrow and gave us a suspicious look.
    “What are we talking about, boys, that your dad can’t know about?”
    Uh-oh. Maybe we had overdone it on the strictly confidential bit. I looked at Frankie. He looked at me. And without thinking about it, I blurted out, “Birthday present.”
    “Right,” Frankie said, catching on. “It’s a surprise birthday present for our main man, Mr. Z.”
    Jimmy Jim’s face lit up like a Christmas tree. “Now that’s what I call considerate.”
    Honey came over and threw her long arms around my neck. She smelled like a human corn bread.
    “If you aren’t the sweetest