queef.”
“You should be.
I’ve been super nice to you.”
“Yes, you have.
I like when you kicked me under the table a few minutes ago.”
“That was an
accident. I mean, I meant to do it, but not in real life. I was imagining doing
it and my foot jumped the gun.”
“There’s
nothing wrong with you wanting me to pay attention to you.”
“No, in fact,
there’s really nothing wrong with anything I do.”
Court laughs.
“What do you want out of Tumbling Rock?”
“I don’t know.
I came here because Christine wanted to. Despite my independent spirit, I’m a
sheep who follows my mother everywhere.”
Court reaches across the table and caresses my
knuckles. “Do you ever think about getting a place of your own?”
“No. One day, Journey
will move out once she finds a baby daddy and pops one out. Poppy will probably
run away to join the circus. I plan to stick around until Mom dies and I can
claim the place for myself.”
“What if you
find a baby daddy?”
“I don’t want
kids.”
Court frowns as
if I’ve queefed all over him. I smile at the thought of me trying to do such a
thing. With my lack of balance, I don’t see the attempt ending well.
“What about
you?” I ask when he says nothing.
“I have a kid.
Remember?”
“I know. Do you
like him?”
“Yeah.”
“What if he
thinks I stink or he accuses me of stealing his lunch money or something? Will
you stop dating me?”
“No, unless you
actually try to steal his lunch money.”
“I’m not a
thief,” I say, patting his hand. “Despite what my sisters say.”
“Are you
messing with me?”
“A little bit.
I want to make sure you don’t have a terrible temper.”
“I don’t hit
women, children, or the elderly.”
“What if an old
lady attacked you with a knife? Would you let her turn you into a
jack-o-lantern?”
“Yeah. As a way
to die, that one seems fairly memorable.”
“I’d pop her
upside the head with my purse and then run away. I figure an old person
wouldn’t be able to catch up. Of course, she could be one of those super fit old
people, and I’d end up getting tired, and she’d carve me up anyway.”
“You enjoy
thinking out your hypothetical situations, don’t you?”
“Sure. Like do
you think you’d die in a zombie apocalypse?”
“No,” he
instantly says, clearly having planned out his survival.
“I would, and
I’d die fairly quickly. I can’t fight or use weapons. I talk too loud, and I’m
horrible at hiding. Plus, I always have to pee when I’m scared. If it were a
fast zombie situation, I’d be dead in five minutes. So remember me when you
survive to the end, will ya, Court?”
“I’ll remember
you every night.”
Grinning, I
scoot around excitedly in the booth. “What would I be doing when you remember
me?”
“Well, you’re a
feisty chick, and I’d guess you enjoy running around naked a lot.”
“I really do.
So what do I do besides run around?”
“You’re very
affectionate.”
“With my hands,
mouth or other stuff?”
“Do I have to
choose?”
Leaning back in
the booth, I sigh. “I like that idea. Zombies rule the Earth, and you’re alone
in the dark with fantasies of me being naked and generous. That’s a Hallmark
moment right there.”
“Do you like
fishing?” he suddenly asks.
“I don’t know.
Is it the most exciting activity ever? If the answer is yes, then, yeah, I’d
probably like it.”
“I want to take
you fishing.”
“I want to take
you miniature golfing. I like to see how a man handles having his ass handed to
him by a girl.”
“We’ll do my
thing first and then your thing.”
“Is this how
you’ll be in the bedroom?” I ask, crossing my arms. “I sense I might end up
unsatisfied a lot.”
“Trust me, Justice,”
he says, running his fingers over my arms and nearly grazing booby territory.
“You’ll never go to bed unsatisfied. That’s a guarantee.”
“I’m really
into the idea of you doing things to me tonight. What
“You should be.
I’ve been super nice to you.”
“Yes, you have.
I like when you kicked me under the table a few minutes ago.”
“That was an
accident. I mean, I meant to do it, but not in real life. I was imagining doing
it and my foot jumped the gun.”
“There’s
nothing wrong with you wanting me to pay attention to you.”
“No, in fact,
there’s really nothing wrong with anything I do.”
Court laughs.
“What do you want out of Tumbling Rock?”
“I don’t know.
I came here because Christine wanted to. Despite my independent spirit, I’m a
sheep who follows my mother everywhere.”
Court reaches across the table and caresses my
knuckles. “Do you ever think about getting a place of your own?”
“No. One day, Journey
will move out once she finds a baby daddy and pops one out. Poppy will probably
run away to join the circus. I plan to stick around until Mom dies and I can
claim the place for myself.”
“What if you
find a baby daddy?”
“I don’t want
kids.”
Court frowns as
if I’ve queefed all over him. I smile at the thought of me trying to do such a
thing. With my lack of balance, I don’t see the attempt ending well.
“What about
you?” I ask when he says nothing.
“I have a kid.
Remember?”
“I know. Do you
like him?”
“Yeah.”
“What if he
thinks I stink or he accuses me of stealing his lunch money or something? Will
you stop dating me?”
“No, unless you
actually try to steal his lunch money.”
“I’m not a
thief,” I say, patting his hand. “Despite what my sisters say.”
“Are you
messing with me?”
“A little bit.
I want to make sure you don’t have a terrible temper.”
“I don’t hit
women, children, or the elderly.”
“What if an old
lady attacked you with a knife? Would you let her turn you into a
jack-o-lantern?”
“Yeah. As a way
to die, that one seems fairly memorable.”
“I’d pop her
upside the head with my purse and then run away. I figure an old person
wouldn’t be able to catch up. Of course, she could be one of those super fit old
people, and I’d end up getting tired, and she’d carve me up anyway.”
“You enjoy
thinking out your hypothetical situations, don’t you?”
“Sure. Like do
you think you’d die in a zombie apocalypse?”
“No,” he
instantly says, clearly having planned out his survival.
“I would, and
I’d die fairly quickly. I can’t fight or use weapons. I talk too loud, and I’m
horrible at hiding. Plus, I always have to pee when I’m scared. If it were a
fast zombie situation, I’d be dead in five minutes. So remember me when you
survive to the end, will ya, Court?”
“I’ll remember
you every night.”
Grinning, I
scoot around excitedly in the booth. “What would I be doing when you remember
me?”
“Well, you’re a
feisty chick, and I’d guess you enjoy running around naked a lot.”
“I really do.
So what do I do besides run around?”
“You’re very
affectionate.”
“With my hands,
mouth or other stuff?”
“Do I have to
choose?”
Leaning back in
the booth, I sigh. “I like that idea. Zombies rule the Earth, and you’re alone
in the dark with fantasies of me being naked and generous. That’s a Hallmark
moment right there.”
“Do you like
fishing?” he suddenly asks.
“I don’t know.
Is it the most exciting activity ever? If the answer is yes, then, yeah, I’d
probably like it.”
“I want to take
you fishing.”
“I want to take
you miniature golfing. I like to see how a man handles having his ass handed to
him by a girl.”
“We’ll do my
thing first and then your thing.”
“Is this how
you’ll be in the bedroom?” I ask, crossing my arms. “I sense I might end up
unsatisfied a lot.”
“Trust me, Justice,”
he says, running his fingers over my arms and nearly grazing booby territory.
“You’ll never go to bed unsatisfied. That’s a guarantee.”
“I’m really
into the idea of you doing things to me tonight. What
Similar Books
