me?"
He'd been mocking me for months.
Theoretically, that's exactly what he'd been doing that day, but
the way he said she had been my
undoing. Why can't she proclaim her undying love for me? He'd looked toward her with the kind of reverence I'd wanted him to
have only for me… That he'd never had for me. That he'd never have for me.
Swallowing back a golf ball-sized lump, I'd
sat back and watched their flirting get bolder and the tension
between them grow more palpable. Then it happened. The green-eyed
monster that apparently lived deep inside me, one I'd never met
before, had reared her ugly head with a vengeance.
Believe you me… she was
ugly.
The way Jayden had taunted me for years had
always been good-natured. That had not been the case for me. At
least, it hadn't been on that day. It had been with a mean-spirited
jealousy that I'd set out to embarrass him.
Loud enough for Xyla to hear, I said to
Jayden, "Mom told me Surrogates are bred to be sterile? Is it true
you can never have children?"
The Aspect Nation was population controlled.
One child per couple. That meant every girl I'd ever
known— everyone but me —had planned
to have the one child allotted to her and none would spend their
time with someone who would never be able to help her fulfill her
white-picket fence, husband, and child fantasies.
With my question, Xyla's face had flushed as
red as Jayden's—hers with embarrassment and his with rage—right
before she cleared her throat, excused herself, and ducked into the
back of the parlor. The ice cream that had been chocolatey
delicious before I'd poked my nose in their business might as well
have instantaneously been infested with maggots. I couldn't eat
another bite.
I'd accomplished my goal of stopping
Jayden's and Xyla's flirting, but I'd never felt lower in my life
because I used something that had been shared with me as part of my
research training, something very few people talked about, and I'd
done that in order to keep Xyla away from Jayden. My Jayden.
If Jayden's glare could have killed, I'd be
dead today. I'll never forget the way he snatched me up by the arm,
dragged me out of the ice cream parlor, shoved me into the back of
Dad's limousine, and left me in there alone to wait for Dad's
meeting to be over. To this very day, I have no idea where he went
or how he'd gotten back to our house.
Immediately, I'd wanted to apologize, but I
hadn't been able to. I'd been humiliated by what I'd done and had
been worried he would tell Mom. I'd convinced myself that if she'd
known what I'd done, she never would have told me anything
important again. If that had happened, my research training
would've come to an abrupt halt and my chances of achieving the
great things she and Gran had achieved would have been lost
forever.
That I knew.
Alone and ashamed, I'd bitten back the tears
of hurt and disgrace and sprawled out on the seat. Dad's meeting
had gone on for hours. After it'd turned dark, I'd fallen asleep
and hadn't awakened until Dad had pulled me from the back of the
car and carried me up to my room.
I'd been groggy, but I could still remember
asking Dad, "Where's Jayden?"
"He had to meet someone, Carlie. He won't be
back for a few weeks," he'd hummed, almost as if he were singing a
lullaby.
Dad hadn't been angry or disappointed in me,
and I'd known by his tone that Jayden hadn't ratted me out. That
fact had only made me feel more guilty. He'd always been a better
person than me. Always .
Suddenly, my eyes had opened wide.
Hysterical, I'd squirmed so much that Dad had to put me down.
"What's wrong, Carlie?"
"I-I need to get a message to Jayden. Does
he have his phone with him?" I'd asked hysterically.
Dad had shaken his head and turned into the
general in charge of our nation's defense, one I'd always been
afraid of.
"He's on a mission, Carles Anise Enoche . He doesn't have time for your
schoolgirl crush. He's been entertaining you at my request, and
that's not a problem under normal
He'd been mocking me for months.
Theoretically, that's exactly what he'd been doing that day, but
the way he said she had been my
undoing. Why can't she proclaim her undying love for me? He'd looked toward her with the kind of reverence I'd wanted him to
have only for me… That he'd never had for me. That he'd never have for me.
Swallowing back a golf ball-sized lump, I'd
sat back and watched their flirting get bolder and the tension
between them grow more palpable. Then it happened. The green-eyed
monster that apparently lived deep inside me, one I'd never met
before, had reared her ugly head with a vengeance.
Believe you me… she was
ugly.
The way Jayden had taunted me for years had
always been good-natured. That had not been the case for me. At
least, it hadn't been on that day. It had been with a mean-spirited
jealousy that I'd set out to embarrass him.
Loud enough for Xyla to hear, I said to
Jayden, "Mom told me Surrogates are bred to be sterile? Is it true
you can never have children?"
The Aspect Nation was population controlled.
One child per couple. That meant every girl I'd ever
known— everyone but me —had planned
to have the one child allotted to her and none would spend their
time with someone who would never be able to help her fulfill her
white-picket fence, husband, and child fantasies.
With my question, Xyla's face had flushed as
red as Jayden's—hers with embarrassment and his with rage—right
before she cleared her throat, excused herself, and ducked into the
back of the parlor. The ice cream that had been chocolatey
delicious before I'd poked my nose in their business might as well
have instantaneously been infested with maggots. I couldn't eat
another bite.
I'd accomplished my goal of stopping
Jayden's and Xyla's flirting, but I'd never felt lower in my life
because I used something that had been shared with me as part of my
research training, something very few people talked about, and I'd
done that in order to keep Xyla away from Jayden. My Jayden.
If Jayden's glare could have killed, I'd be
dead today. I'll never forget the way he snatched me up by the arm,
dragged me out of the ice cream parlor, shoved me into the back of
Dad's limousine, and left me in there alone to wait for Dad's
meeting to be over. To this very day, I have no idea where he went
or how he'd gotten back to our house.
Immediately, I'd wanted to apologize, but I
hadn't been able to. I'd been humiliated by what I'd done and had
been worried he would tell Mom. I'd convinced myself that if she'd
known what I'd done, she never would have told me anything
important again. If that had happened, my research training
would've come to an abrupt halt and my chances of achieving the
great things she and Gran had achieved would have been lost
forever.
That I knew.
Alone and ashamed, I'd bitten back the tears
of hurt and disgrace and sprawled out on the seat. Dad's meeting
had gone on for hours. After it'd turned dark, I'd fallen asleep
and hadn't awakened until Dad had pulled me from the back of the
car and carried me up to my room.
I'd been groggy, but I could still remember
asking Dad, "Where's Jayden?"
"He had to meet someone, Carlie. He won't be
back for a few weeks," he'd hummed, almost as if he were singing a
lullaby.
Dad hadn't been angry or disappointed in me,
and I'd known by his tone that Jayden hadn't ratted me out. That
fact had only made me feel more guilty. He'd always been a better
person than me. Always .
Suddenly, my eyes had opened wide.
Hysterical, I'd squirmed so much that Dad had to put me down.
"What's wrong, Carlie?"
"I-I need to get a message to Jayden. Does
he have his phone with him?" I'd asked hysterically.
Dad had shaken his head and turned into the
general in charge of our nation's defense, one I'd always been
afraid of.
"He's on a mission, Carles Anise Enoche . He doesn't have time for your
schoolgirl crush. He's been entertaining you at my request, and
that's not a problem under normal
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