get it figured out. She’d heard the phrase—a quarter-life crisis. At least that was one upside of Mikey—she simply did not have the time for existential self-doubt. She had to make it through each day, one stinking day at a time.
“I’m going to be forty next year.” He announced this as if it were a death sentence he had no desire to carry out. “If that’s too old for you, I’ll understand. Fifteen years is a big gap.”
She looked at him. His gaze was still fastened on the sky, as if he were afraid to look at her—afraid of what she might say.
“Why me?”
His head snapped down and he stared at her. “What?”
“Why me? I’m a broke single mother. I live with my mom and my sister—and you know what that means.” He grimaced at the mention of Tara. “You’re good looking, smart, you’ve got a good job and a nice house. You could have your pick of any woman on this rez.” She swallowed. It was the truth, but it didn’t make it any easier to say it. “So why me?”
Was it just because she was an easy target? Available? Or was there something else going on?
Please, God, let there be something else , she prayed.
He locked his gaze onto hers. “Because you’re beautiful and thoughtful and a good mom and when you look at me, I don’t feel like the butt of some cosmic joke about a male nurse.”
She gaped at him. “Really?” Because that’s not how she saw herself. And that wasn’t how she saw him, either. “You’re not a joke to me, Clarence. You’re an amazing man.”
That grin—oh, my. “Did you ever consider,” he said in a low voice that sent a thrill right through her, “that maybe I already looked over other women and you’re the best woman on this rez?”
No . She could honestly say she hadn’t considered that option—hadn’t even considered it to be an option. She opened her mouth to respond, but nothing came out.
His mouth curved into a smile that darn-near bordered on wicked as he lifted his hand and cupped her face in his massive palm. “Because you are,” he whispered as he leaned forward. “You’re the best woman on this rez.”
“You can’t mean that.” It was her last gasp at keeping some sort of distance between them—some sort of grip on herself.
And then the distance was gone. “I can and I do.” Then his mouth captured her and she was powerless to do anything but kiss him back.
No one could see them. Mikey wasn’t about to barge in on them. Tara was nowhere.
This was just him and her. She could do whatever she wanted. The feeling was intoxicating.
He ran his fingers through her hair and angled her head back so he could kiss her neck. “Tammy . . .”
She pivoted in her chair to give him better access. She was feeling things—things she’d forgotten how to feel. No, that wasn’t true—she remembered desire and want coursing through her body. She’d just pushed it all down and locked it away. She’d refused to acknowledge that she still had needs because she wasn’t a young woman with a future anymore—she was a mom who put her son first.
Except for right now.
“I want you to stay,” Clarence whispered against her skin as he ran his tongue over her throat. “It’s fine if you don’t, but I want you to.”
That was really why she’d come, wasn’t it? To see if Clarence was the kind of man she wanted to be with—the kind of man who wanted to be with her? To see if she could let a little of that desire out of the box she’d stored it in. To see if she could still be a woman worth wanting.
And this time, there would be no confusion, no hiding her desire behind alcohol. Clarence liked her. He wanted her. He was not promising her the sun, the moon and whatever stars he could round up. There was no grand talk about the future. Just the present. Just right now.
“Clarence,” she told him, promising herself she would not regret this, not like the last time. “Take me to bed.”
Chapter Six
Hands down, those had to
“I’m going to be forty next year.” He announced this as if it were a death sentence he had no desire to carry out. “If that’s too old for you, I’ll understand. Fifteen years is a big gap.”
She looked at him. His gaze was still fastened on the sky, as if he were afraid to look at her—afraid of what she might say.
“Why me?”
His head snapped down and he stared at her. “What?”
“Why me? I’m a broke single mother. I live with my mom and my sister—and you know what that means.” He grimaced at the mention of Tara. “You’re good looking, smart, you’ve got a good job and a nice house. You could have your pick of any woman on this rez.” She swallowed. It was the truth, but it didn’t make it any easier to say it. “So why me?”
Was it just because she was an easy target? Available? Or was there something else going on?
Please, God, let there be something else , she prayed.
He locked his gaze onto hers. “Because you’re beautiful and thoughtful and a good mom and when you look at me, I don’t feel like the butt of some cosmic joke about a male nurse.”
She gaped at him. “Really?” Because that’s not how she saw herself. And that wasn’t how she saw him, either. “You’re not a joke to me, Clarence. You’re an amazing man.”
That grin—oh, my. “Did you ever consider,” he said in a low voice that sent a thrill right through her, “that maybe I already looked over other women and you’re the best woman on this rez?”
No . She could honestly say she hadn’t considered that option—hadn’t even considered it to be an option. She opened her mouth to respond, but nothing came out.
His mouth curved into a smile that darn-near bordered on wicked as he lifted his hand and cupped her face in his massive palm. “Because you are,” he whispered as he leaned forward. “You’re the best woman on this rez.”
“You can’t mean that.” It was her last gasp at keeping some sort of distance between them—some sort of grip on herself.
And then the distance was gone. “I can and I do.” Then his mouth captured her and she was powerless to do anything but kiss him back.
No one could see them. Mikey wasn’t about to barge in on them. Tara was nowhere.
This was just him and her. She could do whatever she wanted. The feeling was intoxicating.
He ran his fingers through her hair and angled her head back so he could kiss her neck. “Tammy . . .”
She pivoted in her chair to give him better access. She was feeling things—things she’d forgotten how to feel. No, that wasn’t true—she remembered desire and want coursing through her body. She’d just pushed it all down and locked it away. She’d refused to acknowledge that she still had needs because she wasn’t a young woman with a future anymore—she was a mom who put her son first.
Except for right now.
“I want you to stay,” Clarence whispered against her skin as he ran his tongue over her throat. “It’s fine if you don’t, but I want you to.”
That was really why she’d come, wasn’t it? To see if Clarence was the kind of man she wanted to be with—the kind of man who wanted to be with her? To see if she could let a little of that desire out of the box she’d stored it in. To see if she could still be a woman worth wanting.
And this time, there would be no confusion, no hiding her desire behind alcohol. Clarence liked her. He wanted her. He was not promising her the sun, the moon and whatever stars he could round up. There was no grand talk about the future. Just the present. Just right now.
“Clarence,” she told him, promising herself she would not regret this, not like the last time. “Take me to bed.”
Chapter Six
Hands down, those had to
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