paltry $322.83. If I was lucky, heâd be a really bad shot, or have a tremor in his hand and the bullet would just graze my ear or take a chunk out of my shoulder.
I licked my lips and tried not to look nervous. Criminals could sense fear, couldnât they? Or was that dogs?
He placed his bottle of sweetened, no-lemon iced tea on the counter.
I picked it up, punched a few buttons on the register, and said, âA dollar twenty-nine.â
âTell me, Priscilla, why is it that things are always something-nine cents?â he asked.
The bottle of sweetened, no-lemon iced tea plummeted from my hand to the linoleum floor where it shattered into a million and nine pieces, splashing iced tea just about everywhere, including on my shoes and bare legs. I couldnât move. I had never introduced myself. I wasnât wearing a name tag.
He didnât seem to mind about the spilled beverage nor about the fact that I seemed in some state of paralysis. He slapped $1.30 on the counter and walked out without getting his change, without getting his bottle of iced tea, shattered or otherwise.
People called Sherman âCumpâ for short. Tecumseh was his real first name. When he was a kid, his dad died and his mom couldnât afford to take care of all the kids. So this rich family, the Ewings, adopted Sherman and then christened him William. A traveling preacher picked the name because the day of his christening was St. Williamâs Day, and the Ewings said it sounded good to them. How fucked up is that? I donât think anyone ever called him William, at least no one who knew him.
âLook, maybe heâs just some perv who walks into convenience stores and says weird shit to people,â Willow said as she smoked her cigarette. âPeople get off on the weirdest things. Itâs a sick world.â
âIt wasnât what he said that was weird, it was that he knew my name,â I repeated, still a bit dazed and jumpy.
âSo, like, maybe heâs somebodyâs brother or uncle or something. I bet someone put him up to it. Shit, it was probably Randy. In fact, Iâm sure it was. This is just his sort of sick humor.â
âRandy doesnât know anyone who owns a Hawaiian shirt.â
âYouâve been screwing my brother for how long, and you havenât caught on to the fact that heâs got some really loopy friends? Itâs like he immerses himself in weirdos just so he can feel normal.â
âThank you,â I said, chewing nervously on the inside of my lip.
âThereâs reasons youâll never be elected homecoming queen, but shit, it ainât like Iâm in the running either,â Willow added.
âIf it wasnât Randy, then who?â I asked anxiously.
âIâm telling you, it was Randy. Itâs got his name written all over it.â
As it turned out, Willow was right about Mr. Something-Nine Cents being saturated in Randy, but interestingly enough, Randy didnât know anyone who owned a Hawaiian shirt, let alone a pair of white pants.
âSince when donât you like chicken nuggets?â my mom asked.
âI said Iâm just not hungry, all right?â
I rolled around the small balls of breaded processed chicken on my plate. I would not look up to meet my motherâs gaze. If only she would just shut up and leave me alone, then I wouldnât have to feel more nauseated than I already did, but I knew that there was more chance of an eleven-foot iguana falling out of the sky and landing on my dinner plate than there was of my mother keeping her peace.
âMaybe youâve been eating so many meals over at the Jenkinsesâ that youâve lost your taste for low-brow cooking,â she said.
âThey eat pizza and potato chips,â I said without looking up.
âWhat kind of potato chips?â
âDoes it matter?â
âLook, you think because youâre seventeen you can get
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