For Better or For Worse by Desirae Williams

noticed how
this once lively room now seemed so dark and dreary…the passion
that kept us going seemed to be fading. I turned around to face
her. “You know why I stopped welding baby. I didn’t want to be
miles away from my family. You guys needed me here. Now this was
brought to my attention when our son was born that I needed to get
my life together, now five years later you still haven’t caught
on?” I didn’t understand her, why couldn’t she see that she was
avoiding me and her son like we were unimportant or something to
scratch off her to do list.
    I started to undress. Lucy
plopped on the bed eyes staring up at the ceiling as if she were in
a daze. “Grant please don’t do this …Not tonight.” I stopped what I
was doing and tried to find some common ground with her. “Look I’m
not trying to nag you. I’m not, I just want you to spend more time
with me and your son… we would like your attention too.” I made my
way over to lie beside her and gave her the pleading puppy dog eyes
that she liked so much. She smiled at me. “Ok…Ok I’m going to do
better. Little Greg is probably starting to miss his mom anyway.
I’m going to make it up to you guys, I promise.”
    I was hoping she had
finally got it. Lucy took her jacket off and laid her head on my
chest. “I have figured out how I’m going to make it up to little
Greg, but I have also thought of some ways to make it up to you
too.” She said with a dirty smile while circling her finger though
my unbuttoned shirt. “Unless…You’re still mad.” I rolled us over so
that I mounted on top of her taking her by surprise. “Baby you
could never make me that damn mad.” She laughed but then turned
serious, “You know I really do love you Grant.” I smiled knowing
that she spoke the truth. “Well actions speak louder than words, so
let’s see how much love you have right now.” She couldn’t help but
laugh as I was stripping us both naked.

    Lucy
    As morning came I went down
to the kitchen to get some much needed coffee. Last night coming
home I knew was going to be tough but thank God it didn’t turn into
a screaming match…like it usually did. I am trying my best to be an
successful editor and really make a name for myself in the fashion
industry, all while trying to maintain a happy household…tough job
but somebody has got to do it. I took a hard sip of my coffee and
reflected on all the years it took to get to this point. I love my
husband and child more than anything in this world; I never want to
make them feel like I have abandoned them.
    Trust me I know how it
feels to have someone who is supposed to love you and be there for
you just walk out and leave. I don’t remember my mother, of course
I have seen pictures, heard stories but I have no memories of my
own of her. All through school my friends told me how their mothers
bought them this, showed them how to make that, argued about this
and so on and so forth. My teen years…Those were the times that got
a little heavy for me but I always had my father’s love and
support. He didn’t mind being the only dad at cheerleading
tournaments screaming louder than some of the moms. I could still
here is voice now. “Go baby Go, tuck and roll!” He didn’t mind
teaching me how to cook old family recipes or sit with me at the
salon while I got my hair did.
    My dad even talked to me
about everything from birth control, periods and sex …no matter how
uncomfortable he was with the subject. That man went above and
beyond for me and I convinced myself he was all the parent I needed
or maybe I just wanted to believe that. I shrugged these thoughts
off as if they were of no importance anymore, can’t miss what you
never had. I glanced at my stainless steel oven and other finery I
had detailed in my home. I took pride in these fine things knowing
I could do well for myself and my family, especially since I got
promoted. I may have put in some long hours, and sacrificed a lot
of time with