incessant talking we have to do are making me antsy, but the music covered up all of the little, itchy everyday sounds. (That’s why I always like going to musicals better than plays because plays are so freakin’ quiet. I spend the whole time worrying about coughing or scraping my shoe on the floor in an implicating way. At musicals and concerts, the music fills up every extra bit of sound so that I don’t have to worry about the sound around me.) It felt so good to have the radio on, like I could let out a giant sigh and hum all I wanted and no one would know but me. I must have looked pretty content because that’s when Justin, adorable with his hands in his pockets, came and sat down next to me.
We had on a classic rock station, and Led Zeppelin was on (chosen by Level II Sean. I had no idea he listened to classic rock. I would have pegged him for a Yanni fan. Perhaps he likes the whole Zeppelin Houses of the Holy thing to go with his many rosaries … ). “You like Zeppelin?” Justin asked. “They’re OK,” I said, because you know I’m not huge into classic rock. “I like Bonham’s hard drumming,” I said. Oh my god—did that sound pervy? Justin looked at me and nodded like he knew what I meant, but he didn’t say anything else. “You?” I asked. “They’re OK,” he said. “I don’t really listen to any music anymore except The Doors.” “The Doors?” I asked. “Yeah. The Doors.”
Let us take a moment to analyze this, shall we? My one major association with The Doors is when my cousin, Daniel, took my sister and me to a Doors laser light show in Portland, Oregon. I can’t hear “Break on Through” without busting into laughter at the thought of the crazy dancing elf on the ceiling. “I guess they’re kind of interesting,” I shrugged. “No bass, right?”
“You know about that?” Justin seemed impressed.
“Sure. I’m kind of teaching myself to play the bass. It’s hard when you like punk and the bass lines are so fast, so I pay attention to other music, too. I’m not very good, but I only do it in my basement anyway. My sister usually joins me on air guitar.” Justin smiled. “How about you? Do you play any instruments?”
“Not anymore.” He looked up and ruffled his hair.
“How come?” I asked.
“Long story.” I waited for him to say more, but I didn’t want to push. We were in a mental hospital, after all.
The rest of Free Time we just sat and listened to music. I wished Justin and I hadn’t stopped talking, but sharing the music was still doing something together. It kind of felt like we were in a rec room circa 1969. Big ugly chairs, groovy music, bad lighting. No black light, thank god, because that always ends up showing dandruff or makes your teeth look freakish and glowy. I’m going to go as far as saying this was our first date. Which would make it my first date ever. I’m probably the only person on Earth who had to be committed to a mental hospital to find a date.
LE BREAKFAST
I learned more about the new girl. Luther claims he heard from Tanya (who, of course, still can’t eat with us because she’s a wayward be-otch) that the new girl, Abby, has seizures, and the metal guards are to prevent her from falling out of bed. Is that what they do for people with seizures? It would seem to me that hitting your head on a metal bar would be worse than hitting your head on the floor, but what do I know.
I assumed she has epilepsy, but Luther said, “No, it’s something else. It’s not medical. She has seizures because she’s possessed by Satan.” Bum-bum-bummmmm!!!
At that moment I wanted to laugh, of course, because there was now an actual measurable percentage of people here having some kind of relationship with the Lord of Darkness, but no one else was laughing. How can they take that seriously? Maybe it’s just because I’m a Jew that I don’t get the whole Satan possession thing, but it seems to me that these kids are just begging for
We had on a classic rock station, and Led Zeppelin was on (chosen by Level II Sean. I had no idea he listened to classic rock. I would have pegged him for a Yanni fan. Perhaps he likes the whole Zeppelin Houses of the Holy thing to go with his many rosaries … ). “You like Zeppelin?” Justin asked. “They’re OK,” I said, because you know I’m not huge into classic rock. “I like Bonham’s hard drumming,” I said. Oh my god—did that sound pervy? Justin looked at me and nodded like he knew what I meant, but he didn’t say anything else. “You?” I asked. “They’re OK,” he said. “I don’t really listen to any music anymore except The Doors.” “The Doors?” I asked. “Yeah. The Doors.”
Let us take a moment to analyze this, shall we? My one major association with The Doors is when my cousin, Daniel, took my sister and me to a Doors laser light show in Portland, Oregon. I can’t hear “Break on Through” without busting into laughter at the thought of the crazy dancing elf on the ceiling. “I guess they’re kind of interesting,” I shrugged. “No bass, right?”
“You know about that?” Justin seemed impressed.
“Sure. I’m kind of teaching myself to play the bass. It’s hard when you like punk and the bass lines are so fast, so I pay attention to other music, too. I’m not very good, but I only do it in my basement anyway. My sister usually joins me on air guitar.” Justin smiled. “How about you? Do you play any instruments?”
“Not anymore.” He looked up and ruffled his hair.
“How come?” I asked.
“Long story.” I waited for him to say more, but I didn’t want to push. We were in a mental hospital, after all.
The rest of Free Time we just sat and listened to music. I wished Justin and I hadn’t stopped talking, but sharing the music was still doing something together. It kind of felt like we were in a rec room circa 1969. Big ugly chairs, groovy music, bad lighting. No black light, thank god, because that always ends up showing dandruff or makes your teeth look freakish and glowy. I’m going to go as far as saying this was our first date. Which would make it my first date ever. I’m probably the only person on Earth who had to be committed to a mental hospital to find a date.
LE BREAKFAST
I learned more about the new girl. Luther claims he heard from Tanya (who, of course, still can’t eat with us because she’s a wayward be-otch) that the new girl, Abby, has seizures, and the metal guards are to prevent her from falling out of bed. Is that what they do for people with seizures? It would seem to me that hitting your head on a metal bar would be worse than hitting your head on the floor, but what do I know.
I assumed she has epilepsy, but Luther said, “No, it’s something else. It’s not medical. She has seizures because she’s possessed by Satan.” Bum-bum-bummmmm!!!
At that moment I wanted to laugh, of course, because there was now an actual measurable percentage of people here having some kind of relationship with the Lord of Darkness, but no one else was laughing. How can they take that seriously? Maybe it’s just because I’m a Jew that I don’t get the whole Satan possession thing, but it seems to me that these kids are just begging for
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