Gone

Gone by Rebecca Muddiman

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Authors: Rebecca Muddiman
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her face.
    He needed this. Needed to let all the anger out. The hatred.
    Bitch. Slut. Junkie. Whore.
    Emma.
    He pulled his hands free and moved them to her neck. He could feel her pulse against his hand.
    ‘Emma. Emma. Emma.’
    Her eyelids fluttered.
    And it stopped.
    Lucas woke up. His breath caught in his throat. He’d come back to the shithole after visiting the police station the day before, and had fallen asleep. He must’ve been asleep for a good twelve hours, longer maybe. He sat up, head in hands. His elbows dug into his thighs as he tried to erase her from his thoughts.
    His head was pounding. He got up and turned the cold tap on. The water sputtered out and he gulped it down. His heart rate slowed and he looked around for his cigarettes. He pushed one from the pack and stood at the window.
    You’d have thought that in a dump like this they wouldn’t care about the smell of smoke but Mrs Heaney, the shrivelled-up landlady, was always giving him grief about it. If you have to smoke, do it outside. Lucas had nodded like a good little boy. There was something about the old battleaxe that reminded him of his nana. She was tough as old boot leather with a face to match and had been the one to look after him most of the time when he was a kid. It wasn’t long after she’d died that he’d started getting into trouble. Maybe he could write one of those misery memoirs about it and make a killing. Anyway, he’d agreed not to smoke in his room but it was too cold to go downstairs and outside so he just stuck his head out the window instead. It’s not like they’d notice the cold air coming in. The old crone was too stingy to put the heating on in any case. Lucas relied on a little portable heater he’d nicked from the alcoholic upstairs.
    He flicked his cigarette out of the window and laughed as it floated down onto a girl walking past, no doubt doing the walk of shame. Why else would she be up at this time of the morning? He closed the window and put his hands over the heater.
    He’d been thinking about Ben ever since Emma’s dad mentioned him. Wondering what he knew, how hard it’d be to keep him quiet. But after talking to the dykey copper, he wondered if Ben was the least of his worries. He had to admit, seeing the photo had rattled him. Brought it all back. But he couldn’t get his head around it. Couldn’t work it out at all. He was in trouble and he knew it, but as long as he stayed one step ahead of the coppers maybe things would work out fine. Maybe finding Ben was the only way to go after all. Find out what he knew. He was always lurking around Emma, poking his nose in. He’d even tried to get his claws into Jenny – that’s how desperate he was. Always hanging around. So it was likely he knew something about how the body ended up in the ground. And Lucas needed to know what it was.

Chapter 14
     
    10 February 1999
     
    Lucas glanced around at all the crap – the teddy bears, the knick-knacks, the half-used make-up from Boots. The cans of Impulse scattered about the place, uniting to create a smell that stuck in his throat. She wasn’t bringing all that shit.
    He tossed the red velvet box towards her and leaned back on her bed. He could see she was tense, expecting her old man to burst in at any moment. It was the first time he’d been in her room. The first time he’d been in her house. It’d probably be the last time. They weren’t coming back after this. Get what she needed and they were gone.
    She was scared about what her dad would say if he caught her packing her bags. Lucas wasn’t stupid. No matter how much Emma tried to act like the bad girl he could see her for what she really was. Daddy’s girl. Her mum had died not long back. That’s what all this was about.
    Emma picked up the box. She looked over at him but didn’t seem that grateful. The girl barely cracked a smile, rarely spoke either. Suited him. The less they said the better, as far as he was concerned. But sometimes he

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