changed dramatically, and in a very good way.
When her two men took hold of her, the love she had for them was written on her face, smiling dreamily when she spoke of them both. She didn't even deviate to one or the other... No, she loved them both with everything she had.
I wanted that.
I'd wished for it many times, but it never happened. Nor had I ever felt the urge to open my heart to anyone.
Even with that, though, my mind kept one name present: Dodge. I could see myself falling for him; it would be easy to. He'd helped me and he was willing to keep me safe. Not only that, but he was as hot as hell.
But, I couldn't trust it, not after my own family taught me trust was a fantasy.
Trust would leave me damaged.
And I knew Dodge could hurt me in a way I would stay broken forever.
After the shower, she wrapped my feet in bandages and placed a towel around me. Then she called to Billy to carry me from the room to a bedroom where he placed me on the bed.
"Dive, get her a drink, something strong. She needs sleep," Billy ordered. I looked around him to see Dive standing in the doorway. He gave a chin lift to Billy and disappeared from sight.
When Dive returned, I drank greedily, enjoying the burn down my throat and the warmth in my belly while Josie found me boxers and a tee to wear. After finishing my drink, I dressed and then curled up in the bed with the blanket over me, closing my eyes.
Only, I couldn't sleep.
I faked it. I relaxed my body so Josie, who sat next to me on the bed, would think I was asleep. Eventually, she did.
"Sweetheart?" Billy's voice said to the room.
God. God, I liked that, the softness in his voice when he spoke to his woman.
"Coming," Josie whispered. The bed shifted and a moment later, the door shut. I opened my eyes and stared at the cracks in the blinds, thinking I wanted to be out there, in the sun, soaking up the rays.
Warmth to my chilled body sounded good. Even though it was a hot day, even though the house was set to a nice temperature, I was chilled to the bone.
Why? I regretted hiding in the garage of Dodge's work. I regretted him finding me, and more than anything, I regretted bringing trouble to them.
I wished I had the courage to sneak out of the house, had the courage to run and take the world on with my own hands.
The courage to fight back.
The whole fucked-up, unrealistic situation was vile and it made me feel sick to my stomach.
A sob caught in my throat. I planted my face into the pillow so no one would hear my anguish at how pathetic I had become. My inability to take control, to have the life I thought I deserved all rolled into that. Pathetic. And I despised myself for feeling it.
If it wasn't my family wrecking my life... I paused with that thought, even more frustrated. It was what I was doing to others, to the people trying to help me.
It wasn't fair, none of it, yet there I was, too scared to do anything about it.
I was weak.
Nothing.
Not sure how long I cried for, I just kept going. Eventually, too exhausted to do anything, I fell into a deep sleep. I knew when I woke, I had to do something to fix what'd I'd done, to take their new crap— my crap—out of their lives.
* * * *
D odge
As soon as I walked through my front door, my eyes sought out Willow. She wasn't in the living room where Billy, Josie, and Dive were sitting. Josie's wide eyes were on my hands that were covered in blood.
"Dodge?" she questioned.
"S'okay, not mine."
The tough woman nodded. When her eyes landed on her other man behind me, she was off the couch in seconds and in his arms. "She's in the spare room, sleeping," Josie offered the answer to the question on my mind.
Moving away from the entrance, I made my way down the hall and into the bathroom. I should have thought. I should have fuckin' thought before coming into the house with blood still on my hands. If Willow had been out there, it would have freaked her the fuck out.
Once clean, I walked back into the living
When her two men took hold of her, the love she had for them was written on her face, smiling dreamily when she spoke of them both. She didn't even deviate to one or the other... No, she loved them both with everything she had.
I wanted that.
I'd wished for it many times, but it never happened. Nor had I ever felt the urge to open my heart to anyone.
Even with that, though, my mind kept one name present: Dodge. I could see myself falling for him; it would be easy to. He'd helped me and he was willing to keep me safe. Not only that, but he was as hot as hell.
But, I couldn't trust it, not after my own family taught me trust was a fantasy.
Trust would leave me damaged.
And I knew Dodge could hurt me in a way I would stay broken forever.
After the shower, she wrapped my feet in bandages and placed a towel around me. Then she called to Billy to carry me from the room to a bedroom where he placed me on the bed.
"Dive, get her a drink, something strong. She needs sleep," Billy ordered. I looked around him to see Dive standing in the doorway. He gave a chin lift to Billy and disappeared from sight.
When Dive returned, I drank greedily, enjoying the burn down my throat and the warmth in my belly while Josie found me boxers and a tee to wear. After finishing my drink, I dressed and then curled up in the bed with the blanket over me, closing my eyes.
Only, I couldn't sleep.
I faked it. I relaxed my body so Josie, who sat next to me on the bed, would think I was asleep. Eventually, she did.
"Sweetheart?" Billy's voice said to the room.
God. God, I liked that, the softness in his voice when he spoke to his woman.
"Coming," Josie whispered. The bed shifted and a moment later, the door shut. I opened my eyes and stared at the cracks in the blinds, thinking I wanted to be out there, in the sun, soaking up the rays.
Warmth to my chilled body sounded good. Even though it was a hot day, even though the house was set to a nice temperature, I was chilled to the bone.
Why? I regretted hiding in the garage of Dodge's work. I regretted him finding me, and more than anything, I regretted bringing trouble to them.
I wished I had the courage to sneak out of the house, had the courage to run and take the world on with my own hands.
The courage to fight back.
The whole fucked-up, unrealistic situation was vile and it made me feel sick to my stomach.
A sob caught in my throat. I planted my face into the pillow so no one would hear my anguish at how pathetic I had become. My inability to take control, to have the life I thought I deserved all rolled into that. Pathetic. And I despised myself for feeling it.
If it wasn't my family wrecking my life... I paused with that thought, even more frustrated. It was what I was doing to others, to the people trying to help me.
It wasn't fair, none of it, yet there I was, too scared to do anything about it.
I was weak.
Nothing.
Not sure how long I cried for, I just kept going. Eventually, too exhausted to do anything, I fell into a deep sleep. I knew when I woke, I had to do something to fix what'd I'd done, to take their new crap— my crap—out of their lives.
* * * *
D odge
As soon as I walked through my front door, my eyes sought out Willow. She wasn't in the living room where Billy, Josie, and Dive were sitting. Josie's wide eyes were on my hands that were covered in blood.
"Dodge?" she questioned.
"S'okay, not mine."
The tough woman nodded. When her eyes landed on her other man behind me, she was off the couch in seconds and in his arms. "She's in the spare room, sleeping," Josie offered the answer to the question on my mind.
Moving away from the entrance, I made my way down the hall and into the bathroom. I should have thought. I should have fuckin' thought before coming into the house with blood still on my hands. If Willow had been out there, it would have freaked her the fuck out.
Once clean, I walked back into the living
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