Let the right one in
when the head touched the cold surface.
    He narrowed his eyes, tried to imagine the boy's gestures so they more closely resembled his beloved. It didn't work so well. His beloved was beautiful. This boy, who now bent down and pushed his head toward his groin, was not. His mouth.
    There was something wrong with the boy's mouth. He put his hand to the boy's forehead before he reached his goal. "Your mouth?" The boy shook his head and pushed on his hand so he could continue his work. But now Hakan couldn't. He had heard about this kind of thing. He put his thumb against the boy's upper lip and pulled up. The boy had no teeth. Someone had knocked or pulled them out in order to make him more fit for his work. The boy stood up, a frothy, whispering sound as he crossed his arms across his chest in the puffy jacket. Hakan tucked his penis back into his pants, zipped them, and stared onto the floor. Not like this. Never like this.
    Something came into his line of vision. An outstretched hand. Five fingers. Five hundred.
    He took the pack of bills out of his pocket and handed it to the boy. The boy took off the rubber band, ran his pointed finger across the ten pieces of paper, replaced the rubber band and held the packet aloft. "Why?"
    "Because ... your mouth. Maybe you can ... get new teeth." The boy smiled a little. Not a wide grin, but the corners of his mouth pulled up. Perhaps he was only smiling at Hakan's folly. The boy thought for a moment, then took a thousand kronor note from the packet and put it in his outer pocket. Put the rest in an inner pocket. Hakan nodded. The boy unlocked the door, hesitated. Then he turned to Hakan, stroked his cheek.
    "Sank you."
    Hakan put his hand over the boy's, held it against his cheek, and closed his eyes. If only someone could.
    "Forgive me."
    "Yes."
    The boy pulled his hand back. Its warmth was still on Hakan's cheek when the outer door banged shut after the boy. He stayed in the booth, staring at something someone had written on the wall.
    Whoever you are. I love you.
    And right underneath it someone had written,
    Do you want some cock?
    The warmth had long since left his cheek when he made his way back to the subway and bought an evening paper for his last few kronor. Four pages were devoted to the murder. Among others was a picture of the hollow where he had done it. It was full of lighted candles, flowers. He studied the picture and didn't feel much.
    If you only knew. Please forgive me, but if you only knew.

    +

    On his way home from school Oskar stopped under the two windows of her apartment. The closest one was only three meters from his own room. The blinds were drawn and the windows formed light gray rectangles against the dark gray concrete walls. Looked suspicious. Probably they were a ... strange kind of family.
    Drug addicts.
    Oskar looked around, then walked in the front door and looked at the list of names. Five surnames neatly spelled out in plastic letters. One line was empty. The name that had stood there before, HELLBERG, had been there so long you could read it from the dark contours left against a sunbleached background. But no new letters, not even a note. He jogged up the two sets of stairs to her door. Same thing there. Nothing. The name plate attached to the mail slot was blank, the way it looked when an apartment was unoccupied.
    Maybe she had been lying. Maybe she didn't live here at all. But she had walked in this entrance. Sure. But she could have done that anyway. If she—
    The front door downstairs opened.
    He turned away from her door and quickly walked down the stairs. Let it not be her. She would think that he was somehow . .. But it wasn't her. Halfway down the stairs Oskar met a man he had never seen before. A short, stocky man who was half bald and smiled in an unnaturally wide way. The man saw Oskar, lifted his head and nodded, his mouth still pulled up in that clownlike smile.
    Oskar paused in the front entrance, listening. Heard keys pulled out and

Similar Books

The Look of Love

Crystal B. Bright

159474808X

Ian Doescher

Moons of Jupiter

Alice Munro

Azrael

William L. Deandrea