Lynn Osterkamp - Cleo Sims 03 - Too Many Secrets by Lynn Osterkamp Page A

She’d remind me of the powerful friendship we’d
all shared over the years, how we’d been there for each other when we went
through bad relationships, sick kids, career crises, and other stuff like
that.” Lark sighed deeply. “Sabrina and I have always been close,
working together and all. She has a way of reaching my soul, like she knows me
in ways most people don’t. Somehow I find myself going along with her even when
that wasn’t my original plan.”
    We’d reached the end of the sidewalk already, so we turned
back in the direction we came from. By then I was too cold to focus. I hated to
wimp out, but my car ahead promised warmth. “Let’s go sit in my car and
talk,” I said. “I’ll turn on the heat.”
    She gave me a puzzled look. “Oh, are you cold? Sorry, I
didn’t realize.”
    Once we were inside my Toyota and I relaxed into the warmth,
we picked up the conversation. “Does Sabrina have this irresistible effect
on all the group members?”
    “Sometimes, but sometimes not. Who else have you met
with from Moxie so far?”
    “Gayle and Hana.”
    “Did they talk much about the problems the group was
having?”
    “They both told me the group had changed direction in
some ways that Sabrina especially didn’t like, and wanted to change. But they
didn’t give any details. They said Moxie has a confidentiality code that
specifically prohibits talking to other people about what goes on in the
group.” I took a deep breath, then plunged in. “As a therapist, I
certainly understand confidentiality, and I would keep your secrets if you’d be
willing to tell me more.”
    Lark pressed her lips together, then lifted her chin and
spoke in a slightly strained voice. “Okay. I’m not afraid to rock the
boat. I’ll tell you more about Moxie. The group is over now anyway, so its
secrets don’t really matter except for the ones that can incriminate specific
members. But I won’t betray people by telling you things that implicate
them.”
    “I really only need to know about stuff that affected
Sabrina. Whatever you feel comfortable sharing about that can help.”
    “Well, Sabrina had the vision for Moxie in the
beginning. She and Gayle brought us together. All of us were fed up with being
victims, so we didn’t want to sit around sharing our miserable stories of how
we’d let men walk all over us. Sabrina kept reminding us of Oprah’s belief that
your life is defined by your intention—that what you put out comes back
to you.”
    I’m not an Oprah watcher, but that sounded positive to me.
It’s always better to move forward rather than obsessing over past injuries.
“How did that work out for you?” I asked.
    “Pretty well at first. Going on that path, we plowed
through exercises from stacks of self-help books, and explored different
spiritual paths and practices. One idea that kept emerging was ‘concentrate your
efforts on what you can control.’ We got that this was about being good
parents, taking care of our physical bodies, building or growing our careers,
and looking forward with enthusiasm. Sabrina loved all of that and so did
I.”
    “But that all changed at some point?”
    “Yes, gradually Moxie turned sour. Some members wanted
to get revenge against exes who had treated them like shit. These guys had lied
and cheated, then denied everything when they got caught. Never apologized.
Showed no remorse. Some of the Moxie members started thinking about the
memories of these bad old relationships as clutter they needed to get rid of in
their lives, the way feng shui gets rid of clutter in a room. They decided that
getting revenge was a healthy way to clear their minds and build their personal
power.”
    Hmmm…feng shui. That might be Hana. I still wanted more
detail about these bad old relationships. “What kind of stuff had these guys
done? Can you give me an example?”
    Lark paused for a minute, leaning back, eyes closed. Then she
straightened up and looked at me. “Okay. One ex was