wanted a strawberry one. When Mum asked me which film I wanted to see, I said Pirates of the
Caribbean because I knew Lily wanted to see it. I was so relieved when Mum said it was rated 12 and why didn’t we go and see Brother Bear instead that I didn’t object like Lily would
have done.
When the lights went down I breathed a sigh of relief. This had been a brilliant idea. Sitting next to Mum in the dark I couldn’t go wrong, even though it seemed a waste of having Mum
to myself for the first time.
When we picked Lily up from Becky’s house she had blue nail varnish on, her hair was up in an elaborate style, she had gold glitter on her cheeks and shoulders and a painted-on tattoo
of flowers and leaves on her foot. She took her shoe and sock off in the car to show me. I would have chosen pink nail varnish.
She was so excited she couldn’t stop talking or showing off the tiara she’d won in the Catwalk game. I was sure I wouldn’t have won that game. I had to glare at her to get
her to calm down.
When we got home and were sitting round the table, Mum said, ‘So, Lily,’ looking at Lily with her hair and nails all done and not at me, ‘Do you think Becky knew it was you
at her party and not Milly?’
Lily looked guilty and sulky at the same time. ‘When did you realise?’ she asked.
‘About two minutes after you got out of the car,’ said Mum.
That night when we were in bed, Lily said, into the darkness, ‘That was the best party I’ve ever been to.’
On Monday, at school, Becky came up to us and asked me if I’d enjoyed the party. ‘It was the best party I’ve ever been to,’ I told her and she smiled slyly over my
shoulder at Lily. Lily just smiled right back.
Chapter Eight
I stayed on the bus after school because I was going to Ted’s. Effy wanted to know where I was going so I told her I was going to see a friend. No way was I going to tell
her I was seeing a counsellor.
It’s easy being with Effy because she does all the talking. I was wrong about her swallowing
How to Make Friends
because there’s a whole chapter in there on how you
shouldn’t talk about yourself all the time, you should engage with the other person and ask them about themselves and find out what interests them. Luckily Effy doesn’t do any of those
things.
When I told her I was going to see a friend she started going on about how difficult it was to stay in touch with her old friends and how it’s like they don’t want to talk to her now
she doesn’t go to their school any more. I was glad she was talking, though, because it meant that I didn’t have to.
Ted asked me how the journal was going. I told him I’d made a start and that I was writing about Pond Life. He looked momentarily confused, probably thinking I meant newts and frogs and
stuff, then it dawned on him that Pond is my surname.
‘Right!’ he said. ‘That’s cool.’
When Ted says ‘cool’ he does not say it in a cool way. He says it slowly and draws it out like some stoned hippy. It made me want to giggle.
I told him about my ‘new’ name, Emily, and how I’ve had it all these years and never knew. He looked as if he was about to say ‘Cool’ again but he changed his mind.
Then he asked me if it made me feel like a different person. I had to think about that for a while.
‘Sort of,’ I told him. ‘It’s weird, I feel like the same person, only different.’ Ten out of ten for clarity. I tried again. ‘No, it’s not the name that
makes me feel different. I mean, I
am
different since . . . you know.’ Ted nodded. ‘So it sort of feels right that I get a new name to go with the . . .’ I didn’t
want to say ‘new me’. It sounded wrong. ‘New’ sounded good and I didn’t feel good. ‘. . . different me,’ I finished.
He asked me about the new school.
‘It sucks,’ I said.
I don’t have to pretend with Ted. He didn’t ask me in what way it sucks, he just waited for me to tell him.
‘I feel like a
Caribbean because I knew Lily wanted to see it. I was so relieved when Mum said it was rated 12 and why didn’t we go and see Brother Bear instead that I didn’t object like Lily would
have done.
When the lights went down I breathed a sigh of relief. This had been a brilliant idea. Sitting next to Mum in the dark I couldn’t go wrong, even though it seemed a waste of having Mum
to myself for the first time.
When we picked Lily up from Becky’s house she had blue nail varnish on, her hair was up in an elaborate style, she had gold glitter on her cheeks and shoulders and a painted-on tattoo
of flowers and leaves on her foot. She took her shoe and sock off in the car to show me. I would have chosen pink nail varnish.
She was so excited she couldn’t stop talking or showing off the tiara she’d won in the Catwalk game. I was sure I wouldn’t have won that game. I had to glare at her to get
her to calm down.
When we got home and were sitting round the table, Mum said, ‘So, Lily,’ looking at Lily with her hair and nails all done and not at me, ‘Do you think Becky knew it was you
at her party and not Milly?’
Lily looked guilty and sulky at the same time. ‘When did you realise?’ she asked.
‘About two minutes after you got out of the car,’ said Mum.
That night when we were in bed, Lily said, into the darkness, ‘That was the best party I’ve ever been to.’
On Monday, at school, Becky came up to us and asked me if I’d enjoyed the party. ‘It was the best party I’ve ever been to,’ I told her and she smiled slyly over my
shoulder at Lily. Lily just smiled right back.
Chapter Eight
I stayed on the bus after school because I was going to Ted’s. Effy wanted to know where I was going so I told her I was going to see a friend. No way was I going to tell
her I was seeing a counsellor.
It’s easy being with Effy because she does all the talking. I was wrong about her swallowing
How to Make Friends
because there’s a whole chapter in there on how you
shouldn’t talk about yourself all the time, you should engage with the other person and ask them about themselves and find out what interests them. Luckily Effy doesn’t do any of those
things.
When I told her I was going to see a friend she started going on about how difficult it was to stay in touch with her old friends and how it’s like they don’t want to talk to her now
she doesn’t go to their school any more. I was glad she was talking, though, because it meant that I didn’t have to.
Ted asked me how the journal was going. I told him I’d made a start and that I was writing about Pond Life. He looked momentarily confused, probably thinking I meant newts and frogs and
stuff, then it dawned on him that Pond is my surname.
‘Right!’ he said. ‘That’s cool.’
When Ted says ‘cool’ he does not say it in a cool way. He says it slowly and draws it out like some stoned hippy. It made me want to giggle.
I told him about my ‘new’ name, Emily, and how I’ve had it all these years and never knew. He looked as if he was about to say ‘Cool’ again but he changed his mind.
Then he asked me if it made me feel like a different person. I had to think about that for a while.
‘Sort of,’ I told him. ‘It’s weird, I feel like the same person, only different.’ Ten out of ten for clarity. I tried again. ‘No, it’s not the name that
makes me feel different. I mean, I
am
different since . . . you know.’ Ted nodded. ‘So it sort of feels right that I get a new name to go with the . . .’ I didn’t
want to say ‘new me’. It sounded wrong. ‘New’ sounded good and I didn’t feel good. ‘. . . different me,’ I finished.
He asked me about the new school.
‘It sucks,’ I said.
I don’t have to pretend with Ted. He didn’t ask me in what way it sucks, he just waited for me to tell him.
‘I feel like a
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