should have calmed my nerves. Only it didn’t. For some reason, it made my heart pound harder.
My shoulder was on fire, so I didn’t argue. I stepped back and leaned against the wall while Sawyer got to work shoveling out the pen. My legs were shaking too hard to leave, plus he was blocking my way out. I felt trapped, cornered, and it scared me so much that tears sprang to my eyes.
Sawyer looked my way and frowned, but never paused in his work. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have walked around in front of you half-naked. I knew you were uneasy with me, and I should have known something like that would scare you. It was stupid of me.”
I didn’t move and I couldn’t talk. The fact that he was saying this was sweet and showed what a considerate man he really was, but I was still trembling with fear thanks to that damn magazine. But there was something else there too. The pictures. Thinking of Sawyer half naked. Remembering the brush of his hands against my skin. Knowing that people took pleasure in sex. It was all so damn confusing!
Sawyer dumped one final shovelful of horse crap into the wheelbarrow, then turned to face me completely. “You can trust me.”
For some insane reason I blurted out, “My uncle disappeared weeks ago. I’m alone. I don’t want to be alone anymore.”
His eyes got huge and the shovel fell from his hands. He took a step toward me, but stopped when I pressed my body closer to the wall.
Instead of reaching for me again, he simply held his hand out. “Let’s go inside so we can talk.”
I was trembling and terrified and torn about the feelings swirling around inside me, but I reached for him anyway. When I took his hand, my heart pounded harder than Nelly’s hooves when we were out for a summer ride. I wanted so badly to trust Sawyer, but the emotions inside me were so mixed-up that I was afraid to. But, I was even more afraid of a future alone.
ack inside, Sawyer helped me take my boots, coat and gloves off, then led me to the couch. He still held my hand, and even though I was shaking I loved the warmth of his skin against mine. The more he looked at me, the more I wanted him near me. The more I forgot how horribly awkward I’d felt looking at those pictures, and the more I began to wonder what all the tingling in my stomach—and lower—meant.
Once we were seated, Sawyer cleared his throat. His thumb rubbed small circles over the top of my hand, sending goose bumps up my arm. “Are you scared of me?”
I shook my head, then nodded.
He swallowed, and I was mesmerized by the way his Adam’s apple bobbed on his long neck. “Let’s make a deal, okay? I’m stuck here as long as this snow is coming down, and you’re alone anyway, so we’ll just agree to live side by side. Okay? I won’t touch you,” he took his hand out of mine and my body grew cold, “and I won’t walk around half-naked. How’s that sound?”
It sounded good, yet bad at the same time, but I didn’t know why and I didn’t know how to explain it to him. So I just nodded.
“Good. I want you to trust me, Lucy, but I don’t know what to do about it other than to just give it some time. We can get to know each other. Okay?”
I swallowed and nodded, and finally was able to relax. But I still couldn’t speak. There was something about the way this conversation was going that was so unsatisfying. I liked seeing Sawyer undressed. I liked it when he held my hand. My body had loved it when his knuckles had accidently brushed against my nipple. There had to be a reason for it all, and Sawyer agreeing to not touch me wouldn’t help me figure it out.
Sawyer let out a deep breath and sank back into the couch. He acted like he wasn’t sure he wanted things to go this way, either. “Now, why don’t you tell me what happened to your uncle.”
“I don’t know exactly,” I said in a shaky voice. “Just like I told you, he went to town to do some trading and never came back. He goes every month, but he’s
My shoulder was on fire, so I didn’t argue. I stepped back and leaned against the wall while Sawyer got to work shoveling out the pen. My legs were shaking too hard to leave, plus he was blocking my way out. I felt trapped, cornered, and it scared me so much that tears sprang to my eyes.
Sawyer looked my way and frowned, but never paused in his work. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have walked around in front of you half-naked. I knew you were uneasy with me, and I should have known something like that would scare you. It was stupid of me.”
I didn’t move and I couldn’t talk. The fact that he was saying this was sweet and showed what a considerate man he really was, but I was still trembling with fear thanks to that damn magazine. But there was something else there too. The pictures. Thinking of Sawyer half naked. Remembering the brush of his hands against my skin. Knowing that people took pleasure in sex. It was all so damn confusing!
Sawyer dumped one final shovelful of horse crap into the wheelbarrow, then turned to face me completely. “You can trust me.”
For some insane reason I blurted out, “My uncle disappeared weeks ago. I’m alone. I don’t want to be alone anymore.”
His eyes got huge and the shovel fell from his hands. He took a step toward me, but stopped when I pressed my body closer to the wall.
Instead of reaching for me again, he simply held his hand out. “Let’s go inside so we can talk.”
I was trembling and terrified and torn about the feelings swirling around inside me, but I reached for him anyway. When I took his hand, my heart pounded harder than Nelly’s hooves when we were out for a summer ride. I wanted so badly to trust Sawyer, but the emotions inside me were so mixed-up that I was afraid to. But, I was even more afraid of a future alone.
ack inside, Sawyer helped me take my boots, coat and gloves off, then led me to the couch. He still held my hand, and even though I was shaking I loved the warmth of his skin against mine. The more he looked at me, the more I wanted him near me. The more I forgot how horribly awkward I’d felt looking at those pictures, and the more I began to wonder what all the tingling in my stomach—and lower—meant.
Once we were seated, Sawyer cleared his throat. His thumb rubbed small circles over the top of my hand, sending goose bumps up my arm. “Are you scared of me?”
I shook my head, then nodded.
He swallowed, and I was mesmerized by the way his Adam’s apple bobbed on his long neck. “Let’s make a deal, okay? I’m stuck here as long as this snow is coming down, and you’re alone anyway, so we’ll just agree to live side by side. Okay? I won’t touch you,” he took his hand out of mine and my body grew cold, “and I won’t walk around half-naked. How’s that sound?”
It sounded good, yet bad at the same time, but I didn’t know why and I didn’t know how to explain it to him. So I just nodded.
“Good. I want you to trust me, Lucy, but I don’t know what to do about it other than to just give it some time. We can get to know each other. Okay?”
I swallowed and nodded, and finally was able to relax. But I still couldn’t speak. There was something about the way this conversation was going that was so unsatisfying. I liked seeing Sawyer undressed. I liked it when he held my hand. My body had loved it when his knuckles had accidently brushed against my nipple. There had to be a reason for it all, and Sawyer agreeing to not touch me wouldn’t help me figure it out.
Sawyer let out a deep breath and sank back into the couch. He acted like he wasn’t sure he wanted things to go this way, either. “Now, why don’t you tell me what happened to your uncle.”
“I don’t know exactly,” I said in a shaky voice. “Just like I told you, he went to town to do some trading and never came back. He goes every month, but he’s
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