My Dear Stranger by Sarah Ann Walker

care.  I didn't care because love and trust plays such a powerful role in this amazing passion we share.
After a time, with my body heightened and sensitized beyond my ability, I begged my stranger to love me.  I begged Him to make love to me.
And as the intensity of that moment had nearly given me over to climax, His lips devoured my body and His tongue left only a trail of eroticism in its wake.  Eventually, my heart raced and my soul screamed out for Him, as my orgasm flowed freely for Him.  Hours escaped from the world and they stayed only between us.
Weakened, my heart beckoned for my dear stranger as my lips covered His entire body.  I felt manic and intense as I grabbed and kissed Him everywhere, but no love making occurred.
Staring once more into my eyes, my stranger smiled as one beautiful tear fell for me.  And I knew how He felt.  Sometimes our love just couldn't contain itself.  Often my own heart felt like it would explode, or simply stop from the intensity of our love.
Eventually I realized I had been repeating over and over, continuously in a gently whisper, 'I love you, I love you, I love you...' until He lay down beneath me, wrapping His arms so tightly around me.
Finally, after minutes of silence I heard His beautiful voice speak to me as he whispered, “I love you as well.”
His words.  God, those five words echoed in my mind, creating a hallucinatory effect on me.  Suddenly crying within my happiness, He held His arms tighter around me, and feeling such tranquility within His embrace, I found sleep was inevitable.

When I awoke this morning to a bright warm sun, my smile gleamed like that of a small child, but my heart ached too.  I could still feel my stranger's arms holding me tight, safely protecting and loving me, even in His absence.
God, He is so beautiful to me, words could never describe, and I love Him more than my own life.
Rising from our bed, I will hold His memory close as I wait for my dear stranger's return.
January 1999
    18 years old
     
     
      Oh, I remember that night.  I remember Him loving me like that.  I remember my shock at the act and my shock at my reaction.  Before that night I didn’t know what oral sex felt like and I didn’t know how amazing it could be.  But I remember learning all my firsts with Him.
      And it really was amazing.  Even my memory is as clear as it was then and I can still feel it.  I remember the desperation, and the building, and the fear, and panic, and then the insane, ultimate release.  I remember screaming and crying and pulling Him to me.  I remember it today as it was then.
      And I know I have never had a f eeling quite like that since Him.  Of course I have felt, and I have experienced pleasure, but not like that.  I have never had that kind of intensity with another.  I don’t even know how to.  I’m much too reserved in my adult life to release like that, and I’m much too adult to submit to a pleasure as carnal and physical as that release was for me. 
     
      Remembering that night I’m suddenly aware of myself and my surroundings.  I’m stunned to find myself on the edge of orgasm, with my hand in my leggings and my knees wide on the arms of the lounger and I’m almost there.  Thinking back, I remember the intensity of His eyes as He watched me come undone.  Watching, He waited until I was barely coherent before pushing me over the edge.  I remember the feeling…  Oh god…  
     
      I can’t believe I’ve just orgasmed and released in my garage in a lounge chair.  Laughing, I’m a little stunned at my behavior.  I hope I was quiet.  Oh god, if my neighbors heard me I think I’ll have to move.  My husband wouldn’t even believe me if I told him what I’ve just done and why we have to move.  Actually, he wouldn’t believe any of this at all.  Nothing.  None of this. 
      God , I need another smoke.  A total cliché I know, but the truth nonetheless.  Horribly embarrassed, I