Myth-Ing Persons by Robert Asprin Page B

humans aren't the leading cause of death in vampires any more than vampires are a leading cause of death in humans, it's certainly one of the more publicized and sensational ways to go."
    "Is that why the first locals we met took off like bats out of hell… if you'll pardon the expression?" Massha asked.
    "You've got it. I think you'll find that the citizens of Blut will react the same way to you that you would if you ran into a vampire in your home dimension."
    "I don't notice you bein' particularly scared of us," Guido said suspiciously.
    "One of the few advantages of this job. After a few years of. monitoring the other dimensions, you get pretty blase about demons. As far as I can tell, most of 'em are no worse than some of the folks we've got around here."
    This was all very interesting, but I was getting a little fidgety about our mission.
    "Since you know we aren't all evil or on a permanent vampire hunt, what can you tell us about the mess Aahz is in? Can you give us any help there?"
    "I dunno," the Dispatcher said, rubbing his jaw thoughtfully. "Until I found out who he was, I was ready to believe he was guilty as sin. There's an awful lot of evidence against him."
    "Such as?" I pressed.
    "Well, he was caught with a stake and mallet in his hand, and there are two eyewitnesses who say they saw him kill one of our citizens and scatter his dust to the winds."
    "Wait a minute. You mean you ain't got no corpus delecti?" Guido said, straightening in his chair. "Sorry to interrupt. Boss, but you're playin' in my alley now. This is somethin' I know a little about. You can't go on trial for murder without a corpse, know what I mean?" "Maybe where you come from," Vilhelm corrected, "but things get a little different when you're dealing with vampires. If we had a body, or even just the pile of dust, we could revive him in no time flat. As it is, the problem is when there's no body… when a vampire's been reduced to dust and the dust scattered. That's when it's impossible to pull 'em back into a functional mode."
    "But if there isn't a body, how do you know the victim is dead at all? " I asked.
    "There's the rub," Vilhelm agreed. "But in this case, there's a matter of two eyewitnesses."
    "Two of 'em, eh?" Massha murmured thoughtfully. "Would you happen to have descriptions of these two peepers?"
    "Saw 'em myself. They were both off-worlders like yourselves. One was a young girl, the blonde and innocent type. The other was a pretty sleazy-looking guy. It was her who sold us on the story, really. I don't think anyone would have believed him if he said that were wolves were furry."
    My heart sank. I had wanted very badly to believe the girl who had warned us of Aahz's danger was somehow an innocent bystander in the proceedings. Now it looked as if…
    "Do the descriptions sound familiar, Hot Stuff? Still think Guido and I were being paranoid when we said this might be a set-up? Sounds like they framed your partner, then came back after you to complete the set."
    I avoided her eyes, staring hard at the wall monitors. "There might be another explanation, you know."
    My apprentice gave out a bark of laughter.
    "If there is, I'm dying to hear it. Face it, High Roller, any way you look at it the situation stinks. If they cooked up a frame that tight on Green and Scaly on such short notice, I'm dying to see what kind of a trap they've got waiting for you now that they've had time to get ready before inviting you to step in."
    It occurred to me that I had never been that mouthy when I was an apprentice. It also occurred to me that now I understood why Aahz had gotten so angry on the rare occasions when I had voiced an opinion… and the rarer times when I was right.
    "I think I missed a lap in this conversation somewhere." Vilhelm frowned. "I take it you know the witnesses?"
    Massha proceeded to bring the Dispatcher up to date, with Guido growling counterpoint to the theme. For once I was glad to let them do the talking. It gave me a