Next Life Might Be Kinder by Howard Norman

money, for as long as seeing her lasts, you’re one of the lucky ones.”
    Who are these good people?
I thought.
Why aren’t they upset at what I’ve just told them? Maybe it’s too much to take in, just over coffee. Maybe later they’ll get freaked out. Maybe
they’ll try to buy the cottage back. But at least now they know this about me.
Not a hint of condescension from Philip and Cynthia, whatever they thought or spoke privately about later, and no follow-up inquiry. Though one evening, when I’d stepped into their house (note taped to the door:
Sam, come in!
), I heard Cynthia’s voice coming from the kitchen: “You know I’m hardly the mystical type, Philip, but if I die in a car wreck, I mean, you never know what might happen next. I might want to hang around and keep an eye on you.” And Philip replied, “You could make a friend of Elizabeth Church on the beach out back.” So I knew they were tossing things around in conversation. Of course they were. I walked into the kitchen and Philip said, “Oh, Sam, hello. Drink?”
    Philip is sixty-one; he retired from practicing law three years ago. He was able to do this, financially, because he’d litigated a class-action suit against an Ontario-based pharmaceutical company. The case was in all the papers; the settlement was astronomical. Philip’s fee set him up nicely. After a few glasses of wine one night, he’d said, “At that point in time, my passion was not the law but to get out of the law. I didn’t much like myself in those days. I did some good work, I suppose. But I had just about shut down toward the profession. Some days, and no melodrama intended here, I felt like I was drowning. Then, after the lawsuit was settled, we went on holiday to the south of France. Just for two weeks. While there, my daughter gave me a book of Japanese haiku. It was a birthday present. This may sound, I don’t know, typical, in some midlife-crisis way, but I couldn’t possibly have predicted the effect this collection had. One haiku in particular, and please don’t get the impression I spontaneously had become a Buddhist. It wasn’t that. I suppose I’d brought a rather surprising sort of philosophical need along to France. I can recite it: ‘How far to the end of the world? Why, just a day’s journey.’ That’s the whole thing. I read myself into it and kept reading myself into it. I didn’t crave transcendence, spiritual instruction, none of that. I wanted a different journey. I wanted out of the world of lawyers. Take it a day at a time. Spend more time with Cynthia and our daughter. First day back from France, I gave my notice. Oh, I’m hardly missed, I’m sure. No attorney at base is indispensable, no matter what said attorney would like to think. Next thing I did was start to give training sessions to young attorneys in several countries in East Africa—human rights matters, mainly. I’d traveled there in my twenties and loved the landscapes and the people. I’d like to go back. Generally, we spend all year here in Port Medway, except for December and January, when we’re in Toronto. Our daughter Lauren’s there with the two granddaughters. I do my best thinking in Port Medway. Cynthia does her best work here, too.”
    Since leaving the law, Philip has written a controversial and best-selling book about a judge who took bribes. He titled it
Crooked Judge.
“The title came out of my new directness as a person,” Philip said that same evening. “Now that I’ve told you my life story, want to take a trip to the end of the world? Well, just to the beach at Vogler’s Cove. It’s a short drive. We’ve got a good hour of daylight left.”
    Cynthia is a year older than Philip. She was married once before, as Philip had been. She designs tables and has sold her designs all over the world. The only maker of