Popular Clone by M.E. Castle

clone myself a bunch of pets. They’d keep me company and wouldn’t throw me into trash cans or make me barf up my lunch.”
    He smiled, then looked down at the little animal in his lap. “What do you think? Would you like to play with another flying pig?”
    FP squeaked and blinked rapidly at Fisher, which made Fisher laugh.
    â€œDon’t worry, FP. I don’t think I could handle another pet just like you—how would I scratch you both at the same time? And how would I keep track of which FP was the real FP? It’s be too weird.” He shook his head. “ You’d feel weird, too, if you walked into the room and there were suddenly two of me .”
    As soon as the words were out of his mouth, Fisher froze. “Two of me …” Fisher looked again at the duplicate animals in the tank. And in the reflective glass, he saw his own reflection—the crazy hair, the bony shoulders, the three prominent freckles on his nose. “Two of me … two of me … That’s it, FP! Two of me! ”
    Fisher leapt to his feet, sending FP sprawling with an outraged squeak.
    â€œMy flat-nosed friend, I am going to make another me. He can go to school and be beat up and tormented, while you and I hunker down here, and ride out middle school in safety. I’ll reconsider going back when I get to ninth grade or so. In the meanwhile, I’ll have a substitute student. A scholastic stunt double!”
    Supplies Needed for Operation H.I.M.R.W.C.G.T.S.
    (hide in my room while clone goes to school)
    Cheetos
    Doritos Cheez-its
    gummy worms
    gummy bears
    M&M’s
    Starburst
    The pig cocked his head slightly in response to all of this, twitching his nose with a look of utter incomprehension.
    All of a sudden, Fisher was flooded with energy. With hope.
    â€œCome on, FP,” he said. “We’ve got work to do.”
    FP trotted along behind Fisher as he strode out of the lab.

CHAPTER 6
    Like attracts like. Ergo: the best companion a boy can have is his own clone.
    â€”Fisher Bas, Scientific Principles and Observations of the Natural World (unpublished)
    Fisher stepped into his mother’s chemical storage locker. It was the size of a large walk-in closet and completely lined with shelves. Fluorescent lights clicked on, one by one, filling the space with a bluish glow and illuminating rows of sealed bottles, flasks, test tubes, copper wire, and centrifuges, as well as three dozen cans of McGinty’s Old-Fashioned Cherry Fizz Soda. His mom was addicted to the stuff and always needed it when she was working.
    Fisher walked the rows until he found a clear canister with a titanium latch on its seal labeled, AGH-X3 , and below that, UNTESTED .
    Below that were the words: EXTREMELY VOLATILE . VERY DANGEROUS . DO NOT TOUCH .
    And then, in tiny letters: THAT MEANS YOU, FISHER .
    Fisher gulped. His mother had been working on the project for over a year. If he destroyed her work, and was caught stealing from her—stealing dangerous and highly experimental chemicals, no less—something terrible would happen. Maybe he’d be the test subject for his mother’s next project—developing an effective angry-squirrel repellant. Fisher thought about being dropped into a vat of squirrels. He twitched reflexively. He definitely couldn’t take much of the hormone without her knowing—certainly not as much as he needed—but if he could siphon off just a tiny bit and take it to his own lab to study, he might be able to re-create it himself.
    The canister was on a high shelf and Fisher didn’t have a ladder. He considered trying to balance on FP but decided the pig would never stand still for long enough.
    Fisher raised himself up onto his very tiptoes and eased his hands around the container as quickly as he dared. He wiggled the canister off the shelf … a little farther … and a little farther, and then …
    The slick canister slipped right through