celebrate, and you bought us all champagne…” She pulls her chewing gum out of her mouth in a long strand. “You don’t remember
any
of this?”
“No! Nothing!”
The door opens and Mum appears, holding a tray bearing a covered plate, a pot of chocolate mousse, and a glass of water.
“Here we are,” she says. “I’ve brought you some lasagne. And guess what? Eric’s here!”
“Here?”
The blood drains from my face. “D’you mean…here in the hospital?”
Mum nods. “He’s on his way up right now to see you! I told him to give you a few moments to get ready.”
A few
moments
? I need more than a few moments. This is all happening way too fast. I’m not even ready to be twenty-eight yet. Let alone meet some husband I allegedly have.
“Mum, I’m not sure I can do this,” I say, panicked. “I mean…I don’t feel up to meeting him yet. Maybe I should see him tomorrow. When I’m a bit more adjusted.”
“Lexi, darling!” remonstrates Mum. “You can’t turn your husband away. He’s rushed here from his business especially to see you!”
“But I don’t know him! I won’t know what to say or what to do…”
“Darling, he’s your
husband
.” She pats my hand reassuringly. “There’s nothing to worry about.”
“He might trigger your memory,” chimes in Amy, who has helped herself to the chocolate mousse pot and is ripping the top off. “You might see him and go ‘Eric! My love! It all comes back to me!’”
“Shut up,” I snap. “And that’s
my
chocolate mousse.”
“You don’t eat carbs,” she retorts. “Have you forgotten that too?” She waves the spoon tantalizingly in front of my face.
“Nice try, Amy,” I say, rolling my eyes. “There’s no way I would ever have given up chocolate.”
“You
never
eat chocolate anymore. Does she, Mum? You didn’t eat any of your own wedding cake because of the calories!”
She has to be bullshitting me. I wouldn’t have given up chocolate, not in a million years. I’m about to tell her to piss off and hand over the mousse, when there’s a knock at the door and a muffled male voice calls, “Hello?”
“Oh my God.” I look wildly from face to face. “Oh my God. Is that him? Already?”
“Hold on a moment, Eric!” Mum calls through the door, then she whispers to me. “Tidy yourself up a bit, sweetheart! You look like you’ve been dragged through a hedge.”
“Give her a break, Mum,” says Amy. “She was dragged through the wreckage of a
car,
remember?”
“I’ll just comb your hair quickly…” Mum comes over with a tiny handbag comb and starts jerking at my head.
“Ow!” I protest. “You’ll make my amnesia worse!”
“There.” She gives a final tug, and wipes at my face with the corner of a hanky. “Ready?”
“Shall I open the door?” says Amy.
“No! Just…wait a sec.”
My stomach is churning in dread. I can’t meet some total stranger who’s apparently my husband. It’s just…too freaky.
“Mum, please.” I turn to her. “It’s too soon. Tell him to come back later. Tomorrow. Or we could leave it a few weeks, even.”
“Don’t be silly, darling!” Mum laughs. How can she
laugh
? “He’s your husband. And you’ve just been in a car accident and he’s been worried sick, and we’ve kept him waiting long enough, poor chap!”
As Mum heads toward the door I’m gripping the sheets so hard, the blood is squashed out of my fingertips.
“What if I hate him? What if there’s no chemistry between us?” My voice shoots out in terror. “I mean, does he expect me to go back and
live
with him?”
“Just play it by ear,” Mum says vaguely. “Really, Lexi, there’s nothing to worry about. He’s
very
nice.”
“As long as you don’t mention his toupee,” puts in Amy. “Or his Nazi past.”
“Amy!” Mum clicks her tongue in reproof and opens the door. “Eric! I’m so sorry to keep you. Come in.”
There’s an unbearably long pause. Then into the room, carrying an
any
of this?”
“No! Nothing!”
The door opens and Mum appears, holding a tray bearing a covered plate, a pot of chocolate mousse, and a glass of water.
“Here we are,” she says. “I’ve brought you some lasagne. And guess what? Eric’s here!”
“Here?”
The blood drains from my face. “D’you mean…here in the hospital?”
Mum nods. “He’s on his way up right now to see you! I told him to give you a few moments to get ready.”
A few
moments
? I need more than a few moments. This is all happening way too fast. I’m not even ready to be twenty-eight yet. Let alone meet some husband I allegedly have.
“Mum, I’m not sure I can do this,” I say, panicked. “I mean…I don’t feel up to meeting him yet. Maybe I should see him tomorrow. When I’m a bit more adjusted.”
“Lexi, darling!” remonstrates Mum. “You can’t turn your husband away. He’s rushed here from his business especially to see you!”
“But I don’t know him! I won’t know what to say or what to do…”
“Darling, he’s your
husband
.” She pats my hand reassuringly. “There’s nothing to worry about.”
“He might trigger your memory,” chimes in Amy, who has helped herself to the chocolate mousse pot and is ripping the top off. “You might see him and go ‘Eric! My love! It all comes back to me!’”
“Shut up,” I snap. “And that’s
my
chocolate mousse.”
“You don’t eat carbs,” she retorts. “Have you forgotten that too?” She waves the spoon tantalizingly in front of my face.
“Nice try, Amy,” I say, rolling my eyes. “There’s no way I would ever have given up chocolate.”
“You
never
eat chocolate anymore. Does she, Mum? You didn’t eat any of your own wedding cake because of the calories!”
She has to be bullshitting me. I wouldn’t have given up chocolate, not in a million years. I’m about to tell her to piss off and hand over the mousse, when there’s a knock at the door and a muffled male voice calls, “Hello?”
“Oh my God.” I look wildly from face to face. “Oh my God. Is that him? Already?”
“Hold on a moment, Eric!” Mum calls through the door, then she whispers to me. “Tidy yourself up a bit, sweetheart! You look like you’ve been dragged through a hedge.”
“Give her a break, Mum,” says Amy. “She was dragged through the wreckage of a
car,
remember?”
“I’ll just comb your hair quickly…” Mum comes over with a tiny handbag comb and starts jerking at my head.
“Ow!” I protest. “You’ll make my amnesia worse!”
“There.” She gives a final tug, and wipes at my face with the corner of a hanky. “Ready?”
“Shall I open the door?” says Amy.
“No! Just…wait a sec.”
My stomach is churning in dread. I can’t meet some total stranger who’s apparently my husband. It’s just…too freaky.
“Mum, please.” I turn to her. “It’s too soon. Tell him to come back later. Tomorrow. Or we could leave it a few weeks, even.”
“Don’t be silly, darling!” Mum laughs. How can she
laugh
? “He’s your husband. And you’ve just been in a car accident and he’s been worried sick, and we’ve kept him waiting long enough, poor chap!”
As Mum heads toward the door I’m gripping the sheets so hard, the blood is squashed out of my fingertips.
“What if I hate him? What if there’s no chemistry between us?” My voice shoots out in terror. “I mean, does he expect me to go back and
live
with him?”
“Just play it by ear,” Mum says vaguely. “Really, Lexi, there’s nothing to worry about. He’s
very
nice.”
“As long as you don’t mention his toupee,” puts in Amy. “Or his Nazi past.”
“Amy!” Mum clicks her tongue in reproof and opens the door. “Eric! I’m so sorry to keep you. Come in.”
There’s an unbearably long pause. Then into the room, carrying an
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