Season of Light by Katharine McMahon

night she wrote a brief note to Georgina about the improving state of Philippa’s health. A letter to Caroline was composed out of a confused desire to conceal and confide.
    In Paris, the rules that we are used to do not apply. Some beautiful new order is struggling to emerge. I can feel the city rattle its chains. And something else is happening. I cannot give you details. I cannot even tell you his name. But Caroline, I have fallen in love .
    And oh, Caroline, love is not as we always thought it would be. In my head, I thought I understood what Shakespeare meant, and Rousseau. I didn’t know it would be body and soul, night and day. I didn’t know I would look at myself in the mirror and wonder how I could ever deserve him. I didn’t know that my sense of self would dissolve, and that instead, all I would want is him. But don’t be alarmed. I’ll come to my senses at any moment. And then I’ll tell you his name. When plans are made, when Philippa knows, then I’ll tell you …

Chapter Six
    The Mortons were annoyed to discover they had missed Shackleford. ‘Had I known he was in the hotel of course I would have made an effort to come down,’ said Philippa. ‘What did he say, Asa?’
    ‘Only that he did not expect to see us again because he was going to Italy, then farther afield.’
    ‘I had such high hopes. Mr Morton said he was very taken with you.’
    Having attended to his wife’s pre-dinner needs – Was she warm enough? Did she require an extra cushion? Should he fetch another shawl? – Morton could at last give his full attention to Asa.
    ‘Imagine what joy it would have given your sister if she’d been able to write to your father to tell him you were engaged to Mr Shackleford. He suggested that he might propose to you, informally, of course, until your father’s permission had been sought. I presume nothing of that nature took place?’
    ‘I could not bear to be in a room with him, let alone marry him. I’m sure I made that clear.’
    Philippa glanced anxiously at her husband. ‘There is no need to be so extreme, Asa. You talk such nonsense. It would have been a great opportunity for you.’
    ‘You know why any such match would be impossible, Philippa. His wealth comes from slavery.’
    ‘I’m sorry that you have allowed your prejudices to blind you to the advantages of such a connection and to the very great honour it was for Mr Shackleford to have taken an interest in you,’ said Morton, who had never spoken so sharply in the presence of his wife. ‘His family is extremely wealthy and influential and he is a man with whom I should like to have done business. Only this afternoon I was talking to an acquaintance of his who plans to deepen the links between French and British interests abroad.’
    ‘What do you mean, abroad ?’ cried Asa. ‘Mr Morton, surely you don’t wish to involve yourself in the West Indies?’
    ‘I export cotton. Indirectly, I’m already involved. And I’m concerned that my trading interests should be protected. Had you been prepared to pursue your acquaintance with Mr Shackleford, you would have done me a great favour, Thomasina.’
    Philippa, who was looking quite healthy that evening, glowered at Asa. ‘I’m sure Thomasina did not mean to offend you in any way, my dear Mr Morton, and would do everything in her power to please you. I will speak to her later. If only I had been in full health, I might have …’
    ‘Dear Philippa, I’m not blaming you. Never. Please don’t upset yourself.’ He patted Philippa’s hand and cast another reproachful glance at Asa. ‘We shall speak of other things. Tell your sister about your letter from Georgina.’
    ‘Ah yes,’ said Philippa, dabbing her eyes and giving Asa a look which said, Be grateful I have saved you from my husband’s wrath. ‘Georgina writes that she has met a gentleman called Mr Warren who has very good prospects indeed, and whom she is sure may propose at any moment. I do hope Father will pay