than ever. Of course, I realize it’s entirely possible that I’m the one being judgmental now, because I’m sitting here thinking how Pastor Rawlins is like the devil. I mean it. I really think the man is evil. And yet he claims to be a Christian. He claims to be serving God. And so do I. And yet we are so completely and diametrically opposed. Oh, why is this so confusing?
HOW TO KNOW
who is right?
who is mad?
which is good?
which is bad?
is it feeling?
is it fact?
somehide wrong
in careful tact
use your heart
or use your mind
where to start?
what to find?
help me know
what’s from above
wrapped in grace
bound with love
amen
Seven
Wednesday, May 7
I guess I haven’t been as concerned with Laura the past couple days because it’s like something major—I mean major—is happening at our school. A lot of the kids who were at the concert last weekend have been coming up to Allie and me and asking us questions. Some of these kids are the ones who came forward to make a commitment that night, and others are just curious about our faith in general. Anyway, it’s been extremely cool.
But the coolest thing by far is what’s happened with Cesar. I hadn’t really noticed him at the concert that night. Probably a good thing too, since I might’ve been distracted by him. But Allie said she saw him there. Still, he wasn’t in the bunch that came forward at her altar call. But I had noticed how he seemed more quiet than usual these past couple days, but then so much has been happening too. Then just this morning, he comes up to me in the hallway and says, “Well, I guess I went and did it.”
“Huh?” I’m looking at him as if he’s about to tell me he lost his virginity or something else Ireally don’t want to hear about.
“Like Allie said last Saturday night after the concert.” He was grinning now.
“You mean you made a commitment to God?” I’m sure my eyes were bugged out like a crazed frog just then. “Really, Cesar? You’re not trying to put something over on me?”
He nodded. “It’s for real. After work last night, I was walking across the parking lot like I always do, but for some reason—I don’t even know why—I stopped and looked up at the sky. Man, you should’ve seen the sky last night, Chloe. It was like every star was so unbelievably bright. And I had this exact same feeling again. Remember I told you about the time in church, all by myself? It was just like that, only way more so. And I really felt as if it was God just telling me to give my life to Him. So I did. Right there in the Home Depot parking lot.”
To my amazement I threw my arms around Cesar and hugged him. I’m sure I had tears in my eyes. “That is so awesome!” I stepped away feeling sort of embarrassed and silly, but I could tell he didn’t mind the hug.
He smiled. “And today it’s like I feel, oh, how do you describe it? Well, like I’m a whole person or something. Like before there was something missing.”
“Like God.”
“Yeah. Like God.”
I told Allie about it, and when she saw Cesar at lunch, she nearly tackled him giving him an even bigger hug than I’d done.
“Hey, can I get some of that too?” asked Jake with a sly grin.
Allie laughed. “Aw, sure. I’m feeling so good I could probably even hug you right now.” She threw her arms around Jake, and even though he’d asked for it, I could see he was a little embarrassed when all was said and done.
“So what’s up with all this huggy-kissy stuff?” he asked as he sat down. “It’s like we’re back in the sixties and everyone’s wanting to have a great big love-in or something.”
“Sounds good to me,” said Spencer as he sat his tray down next to Marissa. “You girls interested in a little love-in?” He nudged her with his elbow and raised his eyebrows suggestively.
“In your dreams, Spencer!”
“Hey, you can’t blame a guy for trying. Besides, I feel kinda left out.”
“Well, if it’s any comfort, I’m not getting
HOW TO KNOW
who is right?
who is mad?
which is good?
which is bad?
is it feeling?
is it fact?
somehide wrong
in careful tact
use your heart
or use your mind
where to start?
what to find?
help me know
what’s from above
wrapped in grace
bound with love
amen
Seven
Wednesday, May 7
I guess I haven’t been as concerned with Laura the past couple days because it’s like something major—I mean major—is happening at our school. A lot of the kids who were at the concert last weekend have been coming up to Allie and me and asking us questions. Some of these kids are the ones who came forward to make a commitment that night, and others are just curious about our faith in general. Anyway, it’s been extremely cool.
But the coolest thing by far is what’s happened with Cesar. I hadn’t really noticed him at the concert that night. Probably a good thing too, since I might’ve been distracted by him. But Allie said she saw him there. Still, he wasn’t in the bunch that came forward at her altar call. But I had noticed how he seemed more quiet than usual these past couple days, but then so much has been happening too. Then just this morning, he comes up to me in the hallway and says, “Well, I guess I went and did it.”
“Huh?” I’m looking at him as if he’s about to tell me he lost his virginity or something else Ireally don’t want to hear about.
“Like Allie said last Saturday night after the concert.” He was grinning now.
“You mean you made a commitment to God?” I’m sure my eyes were bugged out like a crazed frog just then. “Really, Cesar? You’re not trying to put something over on me?”
He nodded. “It’s for real. After work last night, I was walking across the parking lot like I always do, but for some reason—I don’t even know why—I stopped and looked up at the sky. Man, you should’ve seen the sky last night, Chloe. It was like every star was so unbelievably bright. And I had this exact same feeling again. Remember I told you about the time in church, all by myself? It was just like that, only way more so. And I really felt as if it was God just telling me to give my life to Him. So I did. Right there in the Home Depot parking lot.”
To my amazement I threw my arms around Cesar and hugged him. I’m sure I had tears in my eyes. “That is so awesome!” I stepped away feeling sort of embarrassed and silly, but I could tell he didn’t mind the hug.
He smiled. “And today it’s like I feel, oh, how do you describe it? Well, like I’m a whole person or something. Like before there was something missing.”
“Like God.”
“Yeah. Like God.”
I told Allie about it, and when she saw Cesar at lunch, she nearly tackled him giving him an even bigger hug than I’d done.
“Hey, can I get some of that too?” asked Jake with a sly grin.
Allie laughed. “Aw, sure. I’m feeling so good I could probably even hug you right now.” She threw her arms around Jake, and even though he’d asked for it, I could see he was a little embarrassed when all was said and done.
“So what’s up with all this huggy-kissy stuff?” he asked as he sat down. “It’s like we’re back in the sixties and everyone’s wanting to have a great big love-in or something.”
“Sounds good to me,” said Spencer as he sat his tray down next to Marissa. “You girls interested in a little love-in?” He nudged her with his elbow and raised his eyebrows suggestively.
“In your dreams, Spencer!”
“Hey, you can’t blame a guy for trying. Besides, I feel kinda left out.”
“Well, if it’s any comfort, I’m not getting
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