if you just let me…”
I trail off and lift myself toward his mouth, focused on his delicious pink
lips, desperate to have this moment of joy.
“No, we can’t.” He holds me back far enough not to
make contact. “Lucifer would never let us actually be together, Grace. You know
that. He’d torture us forever by keeping us apart.”
Tears of frustration burn my eyes and I glance away,
not wanting him to see the Demon red. I can’t accept a future in which I’ll
never be with Josh, never feel his arms around me or the electricity that
charges between us. “I can bargain with him—” I start.
“No. I’ve been down that road. You can’t. He doesn’t
make a bargain that’s fair to anyone but himself, no matter what he says. Just
know that I haven’t given up on you and that you just need to hang in there a
little longer.” He takes a large step back toward the door.
“Josh, please don’t leave me.” Panic sets in along
with another wave of pain. “Please. I need you.” He may be right, but I feel
like if he leaves, I’ll lose myself again.
He hesitates. “I’m doing this for you. It’s always for
you, Grace.” He shoots me a wistful smile, and I have to look away as he’s
enveloped in blinding light.
Lucifer appears at my side as I sob on the countertop.
“You failed, Grace.”
“I know,” I say, trying to stay the tears.
He snaps his fingers and I’m cleaned up, makeup and
dress fixed, lipstick applied. “You’ll have another chance, I’m sure. Next time
don’t hesitate, and don’t hold back. In fact, next time don’t be so desperate.
Pathetic can be a turn-off to guys like Josh.”
Great. Relationship advice from the Devil. “He’s right,
though, isn’t he?” I ask, feeling as pathetic as he makes me sound. “You’ll
never let us truly be together.”
Lucifer tilts his head in consideration. “I’m pleased
to hear you admit that there is only one way this can go. You’ve come far in
the short time you’ve been with me, Grace.”
My shoulders sink even farther toward the ground.
Asking that question did imply that I’d given up on any other possibility. And
he didn’t even answer, which basically confirms my worst fears. Either Josh
will be forever unreachable up in Heaven, or he’ll come back here and I’ll be
unable to resist seducing him. And when we do make love, it will likely be for the
last time. All that time in Heaven wasted because I was angry and never
understood until now the position he was in.
My heart shatters, but it seems I’ve finally come to
the end of my tears. Instead of sorrow or pain, I feel hollow and dull, like
nothing can really touch me now, good or bad. Perhaps this is my body’s way of
dealing with so much emotional pain; a defense mechanism to protect me from
ceasing to function completely.
“Stand up straight, Grace. You want to be attractive
for Randy. Never forget that your job comes first.”
I nod, standing tall in my stilettos. “I get to visit
Noah when Randy swindles the casino.”
“Attagirl! Yes, you do. I’ll take you first thing in
the morning. And by the way, I love how you said ‘when’ and not ‘if.’ That’s
Demon talk.” He pinches my cheek, and I smile in compliance. “Now go get him.”
First thing in the morning .
That means Lucifer expects me to stay the night with Randy. The thought is too
frightening to contemplate right now. I have to focus on one task at a time.
The moment I step into the next room, Randy greets me
with a wolf call. Suddenly I feel naked again. The silk zigzags only over my
breasts and hips, exposing my navel and most of my back. There’s no room for a
bra in this outfit. And there were no hose in the closet to cover my legs, which
peek out of the ridiculously long slit in the skirt. Then again, if the slit
weren’t there I’d probably never be able to walk; the material hugs me so
tight.
“Baby, with you looking like that, no one’s going to
give a damn what I’m doing.
I trail off and lift myself toward his mouth, focused on his delicious pink
lips, desperate to have this moment of joy.
“No, we can’t.” He holds me back far enough not to
make contact. “Lucifer would never let us actually be together, Grace. You know
that. He’d torture us forever by keeping us apart.”
Tears of frustration burn my eyes and I glance away,
not wanting him to see the Demon red. I can’t accept a future in which I’ll
never be with Josh, never feel his arms around me or the electricity that
charges between us. “I can bargain with him—” I start.
“No. I’ve been down that road. You can’t. He doesn’t
make a bargain that’s fair to anyone but himself, no matter what he says. Just
know that I haven’t given up on you and that you just need to hang in there a
little longer.” He takes a large step back toward the door.
“Josh, please don’t leave me.” Panic sets in along
with another wave of pain. “Please. I need you.” He may be right, but I feel
like if he leaves, I’ll lose myself again.
He hesitates. “I’m doing this for you. It’s always for
you, Grace.” He shoots me a wistful smile, and I have to look away as he’s
enveloped in blinding light.
Lucifer appears at my side as I sob on the countertop.
“You failed, Grace.”
“I know,” I say, trying to stay the tears.
He snaps his fingers and I’m cleaned up, makeup and
dress fixed, lipstick applied. “You’ll have another chance, I’m sure. Next time
don’t hesitate, and don’t hold back. In fact, next time don’t be so desperate.
Pathetic can be a turn-off to guys like Josh.”
Great. Relationship advice from the Devil. “He’s right,
though, isn’t he?” I ask, feeling as pathetic as he makes me sound. “You’ll
never let us truly be together.”
Lucifer tilts his head in consideration. “I’m pleased
to hear you admit that there is only one way this can go. You’ve come far in
the short time you’ve been with me, Grace.”
My shoulders sink even farther toward the ground.
Asking that question did imply that I’d given up on any other possibility. And
he didn’t even answer, which basically confirms my worst fears. Either Josh
will be forever unreachable up in Heaven, or he’ll come back here and I’ll be
unable to resist seducing him. And when we do make love, it will likely be for the
last time. All that time in Heaven wasted because I was angry and never
understood until now the position he was in.
My heart shatters, but it seems I’ve finally come to
the end of my tears. Instead of sorrow or pain, I feel hollow and dull, like
nothing can really touch me now, good or bad. Perhaps this is my body’s way of
dealing with so much emotional pain; a defense mechanism to protect me from
ceasing to function completely.
“Stand up straight, Grace. You want to be attractive
for Randy. Never forget that your job comes first.”
I nod, standing tall in my stilettos. “I get to visit
Noah when Randy swindles the casino.”
“Attagirl! Yes, you do. I’ll take you first thing in
the morning. And by the way, I love how you said ‘when’ and not ‘if.’ That’s
Demon talk.” He pinches my cheek, and I smile in compliance. “Now go get him.”
First thing in the morning .
That means Lucifer expects me to stay the night with Randy. The thought is too
frightening to contemplate right now. I have to focus on one task at a time.
The moment I step into the next room, Randy greets me
with a wolf call. Suddenly I feel naked again. The silk zigzags only over my
breasts and hips, exposing my navel and most of my back. There’s no room for a
bra in this outfit. And there were no hose in the closet to cover my legs, which
peek out of the ridiculously long slit in the skirt. Then again, if the slit
weren’t there I’d probably never be able to walk; the material hugs me so
tight.
“Baby, with you looking like that, no one’s going to
give a damn what I’m doing.
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