hiding place in the bushes. Before it swung back shut, I slipped out. I had this strange feeling that more than just Magpie’s distraction was in my favor that night. Something about the magic of everything working out lifted my spirits as I ran through the gateway and into the dark night. I felt like I really could make it to the other side of the mirror, to the Tree, and rescue Bale.
It was colder than I expected it to be, but adrenaline kept me warm. Soon, though, the biting air began to penetrate the thin Whittaker sweatpants and sweatshirt I was wearing. At least I’d remembered shoes.
10
Buildings, stores, and open spaces flew by as I raced away from Whittaker’s north gates, away from Dr. Harris and Vern. My eyes caught on the Lyric Diner, where we’d taken field trips in my better days at Whittaker, back when we were in Ward A. The last time we were there we had to leave because Wing did a belly flop from the counter and Chord had freaked out the manager when he told him that “in the future his kids would all be dead from the war.” That day Bale and I had shared a booth and a milk shake with two straws. We had to sit close to share, our shoulders touching.
I shook the memory away and pressed on.
I tried not to focus on how my legs felt like lead. I hadn’t run or exercised much at all over the years, and each muscle was happy to remind me of it.
None of the other storefronts looked familiar, which wasn’t surprising because I hadn’t been this far from Whittaker in avery long time. I was coming up on railroad tracks, and just beyond them, a dirt road leading into the woods. I turned onto it, partially because of what the boy-orderly had said and partially because it would be easier to hide among the trees than out in the open.
Before long, though, I was lost. I didn’t know which way I had come and which direction I should head in. All I saw were trees and snow, and every tree looked exactly the same. I sank to the ground. I could feel the snow through my clothes. What was I thinking? Maybe I really was crazy. I’d followed the word of a boy I didn’t know to look for a Tree in the woods to save the life of my boyfriend who had disappeared through a mirror. And, oh yeah, supposedly I was a princess. When I thought about it, it sounded totally insane. And now I was going to freeze to death. I laughed out loud, my voice cackling through the woods. The sound carried and echoed back, reminding me of how far I was from everything I’d known and how screwed I really was.
The tears began to fall one after another. I was not a crier, no matter which dwarf I took. The sensation was new. Like all the sadness inside me was trying to get out. But instead of punching and clawing … it was seeping out in a steady stream. My breath was jagged; my nose was running. The drops were warm against my impossibly cold skin. I was an idiot. I felt a wave of anger surge—at myself, at my mom, and at that dream-boy-orderly for leading me out here.
I wanted to go back, but I didn’t know the way anymore. I had run in circles too much, and there was almost no light out here in the woods. Plus, there wasn’t a real life to go back to. Myoptions were either bad or worse. So I cried until there were no more tears. And then I did the only thing left to do. I got up and started walking.
With every step, I scolded myself silently.
I should have packed food.
I should have taken a coat.
I should have grabbed a flashlight from the guard station.
The should-haves began to pile up, and the thought of giving up chased my every step.
And then I saw it: the Tree. It was unmistakable. Even in the dark, it stood out.
The Tree took up more space than I expected. It almost looked like it took up the entire sky. Above it, the darkness cracked open in a fury of lights, which reflected in its surface. Green chasing red chasing blue chasing yellow, encased in the blackest of clouds. The lights stopped moving and contorted into a
It was colder than I expected it to be, but adrenaline kept me warm. Soon, though, the biting air began to penetrate the thin Whittaker sweatpants and sweatshirt I was wearing. At least I’d remembered shoes.
10
Buildings, stores, and open spaces flew by as I raced away from Whittaker’s north gates, away from Dr. Harris and Vern. My eyes caught on the Lyric Diner, where we’d taken field trips in my better days at Whittaker, back when we were in Ward A. The last time we were there we had to leave because Wing did a belly flop from the counter and Chord had freaked out the manager when he told him that “in the future his kids would all be dead from the war.” That day Bale and I had shared a booth and a milk shake with two straws. We had to sit close to share, our shoulders touching.
I shook the memory away and pressed on.
I tried not to focus on how my legs felt like lead. I hadn’t run or exercised much at all over the years, and each muscle was happy to remind me of it.
None of the other storefronts looked familiar, which wasn’t surprising because I hadn’t been this far from Whittaker in avery long time. I was coming up on railroad tracks, and just beyond them, a dirt road leading into the woods. I turned onto it, partially because of what the boy-orderly had said and partially because it would be easier to hide among the trees than out in the open.
Before long, though, I was lost. I didn’t know which way I had come and which direction I should head in. All I saw were trees and snow, and every tree looked exactly the same. I sank to the ground. I could feel the snow through my clothes. What was I thinking? Maybe I really was crazy. I’d followed the word of a boy I didn’t know to look for a Tree in the woods to save the life of my boyfriend who had disappeared through a mirror. And, oh yeah, supposedly I was a princess. When I thought about it, it sounded totally insane. And now I was going to freeze to death. I laughed out loud, my voice cackling through the woods. The sound carried and echoed back, reminding me of how far I was from everything I’d known and how screwed I really was.
The tears began to fall one after another. I was not a crier, no matter which dwarf I took. The sensation was new. Like all the sadness inside me was trying to get out. But instead of punching and clawing … it was seeping out in a steady stream. My breath was jagged; my nose was running. The drops were warm against my impossibly cold skin. I was an idiot. I felt a wave of anger surge—at myself, at my mom, and at that dream-boy-orderly for leading me out here.
I wanted to go back, but I didn’t know the way anymore. I had run in circles too much, and there was almost no light out here in the woods. Plus, there wasn’t a real life to go back to. Myoptions were either bad or worse. So I cried until there were no more tears. And then I did the only thing left to do. I got up and started walking.
With every step, I scolded myself silently.
I should have packed food.
I should have taken a coat.
I should have grabbed a flashlight from the guard station.
The should-haves began to pile up, and the thought of giving up chased my every step.
And then I saw it: the Tree. It was unmistakable. Even in the dark, it stood out.
The Tree took up more space than I expected. It almost looked like it took up the entire sky. Above it, the darkness cracked open in a fury of lights, which reflected in its surface. Green chasing red chasing blue chasing yellow, encased in the blackest of clouds. The lights stopped moving and contorted into a
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