– eventually. How could he begin to explain to Tina about the other women he’d had sex with? How he longed for their lovemaking to be unique and very special. A magical, mystical, beautiful experience, as different from the quick fumblings and gropings he’d shared with Vera Collins, who’d used him as a brief diversion from her husband, as a long soak in a real bath was from a quick wash in a bucket in the back yard. He wanted there to be much, much more between him and Tina than embarrassing, hurried copulation in a shed or grubby borrowed room.
When he imagined their wedding night, it was set against an idyllic background, like the honeymoon suites in Hollywood films, complete with roses, champagne, soft music and the ultimate luxury: all the time in the world.
The problem was how to explain to Tina that their first time should be perfect? Something worth waiting for. Knowing Tina, if he tried she’d laugh at him for being a stupid romantic, which he undoubtedly was. But then how could she know that although he’d managed to hold his own with the Veras of this world, he was absolutely terrified of turning his initial experience with the virgin he loved into a complete and utter disaster.
‘You sure you won’t get into trouble for being late?’ Tony asked nervously, moistening his lips with his tongue as he faced Diana across the single bed in the spartan bedroom above the café.
‘No, I told Uncle Evan that you’d have to lock up the café before you brought me home. He said he didn’t mind as long as I wasn’t out alone late at night in the blackout.’
‘You don’t think he guessed?’
‘Why should he? You’ve brought me home late before.’ She placed the saucer that held the candle on the seat of a rickety wooden chair next to the bed.
‘I suppose I have.’ He looked at the bed, then the rest of the room. For the first time he saw it through a stranger’s eyes. Shabby, grimy and devoid of anything remotely resembling comfort let alone luxury. A depressing place to celebrate love and begin a new life. The inadequate light of the candle could not conceal the condensation stains on the peeling wallpaper. Neither could his hastily applied cologne nor Diana’s scent mask the cold, stale, musty smell of damp. ‘I’m sorry about the surroundings,’ he apologised. ‘None of the girls has ever slept here, and I never realised how dismal it is until now.’
She tried to smile at him but the muscles froze in her face. Lean, thin and very dark, he looked almost satanic in the flickering shadows. ‘Is there another room, or is this where you sleep when you stay overnight?’ she asked nervously, looking from the narrow bed to the bare floorboards, their corners powdered with dust and fluff balls.
‘There’s another room but we use it to store stock. Ronnie was the one who actually put the bed in here.’ He walked to the window to check the blackout curtains; not that they needed it, he’d been meticulous in closing them, but he could no longer look her in the eye. ‘He used to sleep here when he and Papa quarrelled.’
‘Over Maud?’
He turned around. ‘I think there were even more quarrels between Ronnie and Papa before Maud came on the scene than there were afterwards.’
‘It’s funny.’
‘What?’ he asked anxiously, still half dreading – half hoping – that she’d change her mind.
‘My cousin Maud marrying your brother, and now me here. Maud and I were closer than most sisters before she went away.’
‘Which only goes to show that Ronnie and I have the same good taste in Powell women.’ He took a step towards her and she shrank instinctively away from him.
‘You know I’d never do anything to hurt you.’ He reached out and touched her hair. She shuddered as though he’d burnt her. ‘You’re freezing.’ He wrapped his arms around her. ‘You are sure …’
‘I’m sure, Tony,’ she interrupted forcefully.
‘Then perhaps it’s time you got under the
When he imagined their wedding night, it was set against an idyllic background, like the honeymoon suites in Hollywood films, complete with roses, champagne, soft music and the ultimate luxury: all the time in the world.
The problem was how to explain to Tina that their first time should be perfect? Something worth waiting for. Knowing Tina, if he tried she’d laugh at him for being a stupid romantic, which he undoubtedly was. But then how could she know that although he’d managed to hold his own with the Veras of this world, he was absolutely terrified of turning his initial experience with the virgin he loved into a complete and utter disaster.
‘You sure you won’t get into trouble for being late?’ Tony asked nervously, moistening his lips with his tongue as he faced Diana across the single bed in the spartan bedroom above the café.
‘No, I told Uncle Evan that you’d have to lock up the café before you brought me home. He said he didn’t mind as long as I wasn’t out alone late at night in the blackout.’
‘You don’t think he guessed?’
‘Why should he? You’ve brought me home late before.’ She placed the saucer that held the candle on the seat of a rickety wooden chair next to the bed.
‘I suppose I have.’ He looked at the bed, then the rest of the room. For the first time he saw it through a stranger’s eyes. Shabby, grimy and devoid of anything remotely resembling comfort let alone luxury. A depressing place to celebrate love and begin a new life. The inadequate light of the candle could not conceal the condensation stains on the peeling wallpaper. Neither could his hastily applied cologne nor Diana’s scent mask the cold, stale, musty smell of damp. ‘I’m sorry about the surroundings,’ he apologised. ‘None of the girls has ever slept here, and I never realised how dismal it is until now.’
She tried to smile at him but the muscles froze in her face. Lean, thin and very dark, he looked almost satanic in the flickering shadows. ‘Is there another room, or is this where you sleep when you stay overnight?’ she asked nervously, looking from the narrow bed to the bare floorboards, their corners powdered with dust and fluff balls.
‘There’s another room but we use it to store stock. Ronnie was the one who actually put the bed in here.’ He walked to the window to check the blackout curtains; not that they needed it, he’d been meticulous in closing them, but he could no longer look her in the eye. ‘He used to sleep here when he and Papa quarrelled.’
‘Over Maud?’
He turned around. ‘I think there were even more quarrels between Ronnie and Papa before Maud came on the scene than there were afterwards.’
‘It’s funny.’
‘What?’ he asked anxiously, still half dreading – half hoping – that she’d change her mind.
‘My cousin Maud marrying your brother, and now me here. Maud and I were closer than most sisters before she went away.’
‘Which only goes to show that Ronnie and I have the same good taste in Powell women.’ He took a step towards her and she shrank instinctively away from him.
‘You know I’d never do anything to hurt you.’ He reached out and touched her hair. She shuddered as though he’d burnt her. ‘You’re freezing.’ He wrapped his arms around her. ‘You are sure …’
‘I’m sure, Tony,’ she interrupted forcefully.
‘Then perhaps it’s time you got under the
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