where she was.
“Tseeeeer!”
I screamed in rage and frustration and terror as I stooped. I shot toward the door like I’d shot toward the rat.
But I wasn’t going to stop. I wasn’t going to slow down. I was just going to end this right now. I would hit the glass at full speed and maybe that would awaken me from this nightmare.
The speed just kept building. The door rushed up at me. The earth itself was jumping up to hit me.
A guy, dark hair, short, stepped to the door. He opened it.
Shwoooop!
I must have been doing eighty as I hurtled through the open door.
A second set of doors, but these were open, too.
No impact.
No awakening.
Colors and bright lights all around me. Like a highs-peed kaleidoscope.
The Gap. Express. The Body Shop. Easy Spirit. Mrs. Fields.
Zoom!
I was a bullet, blazing inches over the heads of the shoppers. I heard screams. I heard cries of amazement.
I didn’t care. I wanted to hit something. I wanted to wake up. I wanted to fall to the ground because my wings had disappeared and been replaced by clumsy legs and flailing arms.
I wanted to be me again.
I am human! I am human! I am Tobias!
Nine West. Radio Shack. Barnes & Noble. Benetton. A world I knew. A world where I belonged. Places I had been. Foods I had eaten. The world of human beings.
Zoom!
Suddenly, in seconds, I was at the center of the mall.
A crowd was standing around in a circle. In the middle of the circle, blue mats were on the floor. Girls in leotards were doing midair flips and graceful backbends. People on the upper level were crowded around the railing to look down.
Rachel was on the balance beam. She was just raising one leg, balancing on the other.
I was a brown and gold and red missile shooting past her.
“Tobias!” she cried.
Straight ahead, a wall. A blank wall where they were going to put a new shop. I was still moving fast. I could still hit it and wake myself up from the nightmare.
“No!” Rachel cried.
I flared and shot straight up. The wall scraped my stomach. The ceiling was glass, a skylight. I was there! A last-second turn, almost too late. My shoulder hit the glass. I bounced off and began to fall down toward upraised faces staring at me with horror and amazement and pity.
I saw Rachel’s face in that crowd. Her eyes pleaded silently. No, she mouthed. No.
I fell, stunned and dazed. Rachel, still balanced on the beam, caught me as I dropped. She fell off and the two of us tumbled onto the mat.
“You have to get out of here!” she muttered tersely.
I cried. killed!>
“No. As long as you have me and the others, you aren’t lost, Tobias.”
Helping hands were reaching, trying to save Rachel from the crazed, out-of-control bird. She gave me a heave. Just enough to get me into the air. Anyone watching would have thought she was trying to get me off her.
I flapped up, just out of reach of a dozen hands that clawed the air trying to grab me. Someone threw a shopping bag at me. I dodged.
But there was no escape. Overhead I saw the skylight. Blue sky.
The hawk in my head wanted the sky. It knew safety was up in the high blue. The hawk powered straight up. Straight up at the glass that he didn’t understand. The glass that would be like a brick wall.
But I couldn’t fight it anymore. The hawk had won. I had killed. I had killed and eaten. And I had loved it. The ecstasy of the hunt.
Ecstasy!
In a second it would all be over. One more stroke of my powerful wings and the glass …
Out of the comer of my eye I saw a familiar face on the upper level. Suddenly something shot past me. Small, white, stitched.
CRASH!
The baseball hit the glass just inches ahead of my beak. Just where Marco had aimed it. Glass shards fell around me. I shot through the hole.
Sky!
The hawk flew fast and straight.
I let it go. I surrendered.
Tobias, a boy whose face I could no longer remember, no longer existed.
CHAPTER 16
T he next few
Jennifer Snyder
Mark Twain, W. Bill Czolgosz
Frida Berrigan
Laura Disilverio
Lisa Scottoline
Willo Davis Roberts
Abigail Reynolds
Albert French
Zadie Smith
Stanley Booth