The Most Famous Illegal Goose Creek Parade by Virginia Smith

of the gossip, but even if the Updykes’ actual bottom price was six hundred thousand, that would be twenty-five percent lower than—
    He jerked upright, causing the canoe to wobble. What was he thinking ?
    â€œThe repairs would probably be at least a hundred thousand,” he told his wife.
    â€œWe could do a lot of the work ourselves.” She leaned toward him and planted her elbows on her knees. “My friends and I can strip the wallpaper, and we can certainly do the painting. You’re handy with a hammer and screwdriver, so you can do a lot of the fixing up yourself. For the bigger stuff, Laura knows a young man over in Frankfort who just started his own home repair business. She says he’s very good and his rates are reasonable.”
    Good golly, she had the whole thing planned already. This was no spur-of-the-moment idea. She’d spent time looking into it.
    â€œBut Millie, we don’t need six bedrooms and seven fireplaces. And while I admit that back porch would be nice—”
    â€œI knew you’d love that,” she put in, her tone bright with excitement.
    Al continued. “The fact is we can’t afford to wipe out our savings three years before we retire.”
    â€œIt wouldn’t wipe out our savings.”
    True. They had always lived frugally, and had been planning for retirement from the early years of their marriage. “It would certainly put a huge dent in them.”
    She averted her gaze toward the gently rippling water beside them. “What if the house made money for us?”
    â€œHuh?”
    â€œOnce we got it fixed up, I think the Updyke house would pay for itself.”
    â€œYou mean, fix it up and resell it? Like that TV show, Flip or Flop ?”
    â€œNo.” One delicate finger trailed across the canoe’s rubber edge as she spoke. “I mean we could open a bed and breakfast.”
    In the silence that followed, Al replayed the words in his mind. Individually, he understood every one, but strung together like that, they made no sense. Surely his wife, the love of his life, his levelheaded Millie, had not just suggested that they launch a new business at the time when they were finally ready to kick back and enjoy themselves.
    â€œExcuse me.” He put a finger in his ear and shook it dramatically. “For a moment I thought you said you wanted to open a hotel.”
    â€œNot a hotel. A bed and breakfast.” She leaned toward him, enthusiasm dancing in her eyes. “I’ve always wanted to run one. You know how I love to entertain, and I have such marvelous decorating ideas. It would be tremendous fun, like having houseguests every night.”
    Definitely not his idea of fun. “Who in their right mind would want to visit Goose Creek?”
    â€œHorse race enthusiasts,” she replied. “Keeneland Race Course is just fifteen miles away, and the Kentucky Horse Park, and all the thoroughbred farms, and of course there’s the Derby. And all the wineries in the area, and the Bourbon Trail. And the state capital in Frankfort. Besides, people would love the chance to stay in a Victorian house on a beautiful property.”
    Who was this woman?
    He reached out and gripped her shoulders. “Millie, listen to yourself. We’re about to retire . Our house is paid for, our kids grown. We have no commitments, nothing to tie us down. I want to travel, to visit places we’ve never seen. The Grand Canyon. Florida. San Francisco. Yellowstone and Old Faithful.” He released her and waved hishands expansively. “There’s a whole country full of places we’ve never been to, just waiting for us to discover them.”
    â€œAlbert, be reasonable. Do you know how much airline tickets are these days? And hotel rooms?”
    â€œI do. That’s why we’d buy a motor home.”
    She blinked. “A what?”
    â€œA motor home. An RV.” He poured his enthusiasm into a wide