Through the Fire by Donna Hill Page A

the police said. You don’t lose your family, your life by accident. A simple trip to the local bodega for some sandwiches and sodas had turned into a shootout that left the assailant and her husband and daughter dead.
    Sterling Lindsay had been her first love. They’d known each other since high school.She could still remember the first time he kissed her at the senior prom and she knew then and there that he was the man she would marry. He was handsome, kind, generous, and a tender lover.
    But she had to admit, they had their problems during their eight years of marriage. Sterling was from the old school that believed it was the man who was the head of the household, the breadwinner, the provider, the decision maker. Her role was simple: be happy, take care of hearth and home. Though he tolerated her musical career, he didn’t really support it. They’d had more blowups than she cared to remember regarding her steady upward climb in the entertainment field.
     
    “Why can’t you be as proud of me as I am of you, Sterling?” she’d ranted as she tried to get ready for the American Music Awards ceremony. The car was due to pick them up any minute.
    Sterling sat on the edge of the bed still in his work clothes, making no attempt to put on the tux she’d laid out for him. He lit a cigarette. “Of course I’m proud of you,” he said with a total lack of conviction.
    “Then why do we always have to go through this? You make me feel as if I’m doing something so horribly wrong. I love what I do. You know that.”
    “And what about Akia and me?” he tossed back. “What do you think happens to us when you spend hours at the studio, come home bone tired, and fall into bed, when you travel all over the place behind these so-called artists? You take care of everyone else, Rae. What about us?”
    “I love you and Akia,” she said, feeling totally helpless. “What can I do differently? How can I make things better?”
    “Do you really want to know?”
    “Yes. Tell me.”
    “Remember why you married me,” he said simply, then got up from the bed and walked out of the room.
    She was torn. Torn between her love for her family and her love for her work. She didn’t want to give up either. Maybe Sterling was right, she thought, stepping into her gown. Maybe she did put too much effort into her work and not enough into her family. Was she depriving Akia of a real mother, and Sterling areal wife? But she couldn’t think about that now. Tonight was too important. They’d work all this out later.
    She heard the doorbell and the low voice of her husband when it was answered. She went to the top of the stairs.
    “Your car is here,” Sterling said and walked away.
    She came down to find him in the living room with Akia, seated comfortably in front of the television. Akia looked beautiful in the party dress Rae had picked out especially for the occasion.
    “So you’re not coming?”
    Sterling looked up at her dispassionately. “No.”
    Rae tugged in a breath. “Come on, sweetie, it’s time to go,” she said to her daughter.
    “She’s not going either.”
    Rae opened her mouth to protest, but knew it would be pointless, and she didn’t want to argue in front of Akia. He was just doing this to punish her, to make her feel guilty. He never could understand how important her career was to her, how hard she worked to achieve her goals. He would love it if she just stayed homeand made babies and had a hot meal on the table every night. But she had a future, and she wouldn’t let his jealousy stop her.
    She walked over to where Akia was huddled on the love seat. “Listen, sweetie,” she began, adjusting her daughter’s thick pigtails behind her shoulders. “Mommy has to go, but I know Daddy has some real treats for you, and you’re going to have a great time.”
    “Why can’t I go?” Akia whined, her eyes filling with tears. “You promised.”
    “I know, baby.” She glanced up at Sterling, who stared back at