two apart... they’re months apart and I can’t handle it.”
Surprisingly , Darryl laughs. “You can’t sleep because you’re horny? You’re letting your sparring partners get through your guard because you want to fuck your girlfriend?” He pinches the bridge of his nose (a typical Darryl reaction) and exhales. “If having sex is going to keep you on the top of your game and alert, then fine, do it. But if you come back tomorrow and you don’t give me two hundred percent, I’m going to kick your ass myself, got it?”
I roll my eyes. Darryl’s good at what he does and definitely knows his way around a cage, but he could never beat me.
“Go it?”
“Yeah, I got it.”
“Good.” He turns from me to face the other sparrers. “Next.”
As my next sparrer prepares his gloves, I scan the gym for Olivia. I spot her leaning against a training room door. Her long, slender fingers reach up and tighten her ponytail and she flicks it over one shoulder.
She’s perfect.
I think back to my recent flashback and grit my teeth as a pang of guilt crushes my stomach. The fact Olivia willing touches what too many other girls have touched makes me sick. I should be special for her…like she is special for me. If I could go back and do everything again, I’d have waited for her because no one makes me feel as good as she does. Olivia doesn’t make me feel dirty, like I did when I was with other girls. When we have sex, she doesn’t make me feel like I’m doing something wrong and that’s what drew me to her. She makes me feel good, she makes me feel like a better person—the person I should have been for my father. I watch her laugh and playfully slap Brad on the arm, and even from here I can see the pink flush that burns at her cheeks. Brad grabs her shoulders and pulls her into him before his eyes flick to me.
Oh hell no .
I tear my gloves off and drop them to the floor as my new sparrer steps in. I stalk across the ring and the floor shakes with every step I take.
“What the hell are you doing? Put your gloves back on ,” Darryl demands.
“More important things to do ,” I tell him, not breaking my visual on Brad and Olivia.
“More important things—Seth …”
I ignore him as I slip between the ropes and onto the stable gym floor. Bra d retracts his arms from Olivia and an uncomfortable cringe creeps over his face. When she turns to see me coming for her, she shakes her head at me, like I’m seconds away from overreacting.
“Seth, what are you—ah!” I grab her hips and lift her, throwing her over my shoulder. “Put me down—Brad, give me a second. Seth, stop.”
I don’t stop. I keep carrying her until we’re in her office. I storm across the room and drop her into her office chair, gripping the arms of it so it doesn’t roll away.
“Feel better now?” She laughs and I feel my eyebrows draw together. Is this funny?
“He isn’t coming here, O. Tell him we’re full ,” I demand in a tone so dark she can’t possibly mistake it for a question.
Her soft hands glide up my arms , softening my frustrated edge. “You don’t trust me?”
I stare into her beautiful green eyes, unwavering. “I trust you—it’s everybody else I don’t trust.”
“Seth…” She sighs, running a hand over her face, defeated. “Brad is gay. He isn’t into me, he’s into you.”
I frown and her hands rise to her mouth as her body vibrates with laughter. Gay? No…I’ve seen and met plenty of gay guys. They were all the same—confident, over the top, and feminine. Brad has a husky voice, he doesn’t walk funny, and I didn’t see him purse his lips once. I drop to my knees, keeping my hands on the armrests.
“You look shocked.” Her chest hiccups with a remaining giggle.
“I am. He doesn’t look gay …”
“What do you mean he doesn’t look gay? Gays aren’t all the same.”
But I’m certain they are. I’ve seen so many and all their personalities have been as indistinguishable as
Surprisingly , Darryl laughs. “You can’t sleep because you’re horny? You’re letting your sparring partners get through your guard because you want to fuck your girlfriend?” He pinches the bridge of his nose (a typical Darryl reaction) and exhales. “If having sex is going to keep you on the top of your game and alert, then fine, do it. But if you come back tomorrow and you don’t give me two hundred percent, I’m going to kick your ass myself, got it?”
I roll my eyes. Darryl’s good at what he does and definitely knows his way around a cage, but he could never beat me.
“Go it?”
“Yeah, I got it.”
“Good.” He turns from me to face the other sparrers. “Next.”
As my next sparrer prepares his gloves, I scan the gym for Olivia. I spot her leaning against a training room door. Her long, slender fingers reach up and tighten her ponytail and she flicks it over one shoulder.
She’s perfect.
I think back to my recent flashback and grit my teeth as a pang of guilt crushes my stomach. The fact Olivia willing touches what too many other girls have touched makes me sick. I should be special for her…like she is special for me. If I could go back and do everything again, I’d have waited for her because no one makes me feel as good as she does. Olivia doesn’t make me feel dirty, like I did when I was with other girls. When we have sex, she doesn’t make me feel like I’m doing something wrong and that’s what drew me to her. She makes me feel good, she makes me feel like a better person—the person I should have been for my father. I watch her laugh and playfully slap Brad on the arm, and even from here I can see the pink flush that burns at her cheeks. Brad grabs her shoulders and pulls her into him before his eyes flick to me.
Oh hell no .
I tear my gloves off and drop them to the floor as my new sparrer steps in. I stalk across the ring and the floor shakes with every step I take.
“What the hell are you doing? Put your gloves back on ,” Darryl demands.
“More important things to do ,” I tell him, not breaking my visual on Brad and Olivia.
“More important things—Seth …”
I ignore him as I slip between the ropes and onto the stable gym floor. Bra d retracts his arms from Olivia and an uncomfortable cringe creeps over his face. When she turns to see me coming for her, she shakes her head at me, like I’m seconds away from overreacting.
“Seth, what are you—ah!” I grab her hips and lift her, throwing her over my shoulder. “Put me down—Brad, give me a second. Seth, stop.”
I don’t stop. I keep carrying her until we’re in her office. I storm across the room and drop her into her office chair, gripping the arms of it so it doesn’t roll away.
“Feel better now?” She laughs and I feel my eyebrows draw together. Is this funny?
“He isn’t coming here, O. Tell him we’re full ,” I demand in a tone so dark she can’t possibly mistake it for a question.
Her soft hands glide up my arms , softening my frustrated edge. “You don’t trust me?”
I stare into her beautiful green eyes, unwavering. “I trust you—it’s everybody else I don’t trust.”
“Seth…” She sighs, running a hand over her face, defeated. “Brad is gay. He isn’t into me, he’s into you.”
I frown and her hands rise to her mouth as her body vibrates with laughter. Gay? No…I’ve seen and met plenty of gay guys. They were all the same—confident, over the top, and feminine. Brad has a husky voice, he doesn’t walk funny, and I didn’t see him purse his lips once. I drop to my knees, keeping my hands on the armrests.
“You look shocked.” Her chest hiccups with a remaining giggle.
“I am. He doesn’t look gay …”
“What do you mean he doesn’t look gay? Gays aren’t all the same.”
But I’m certain they are. I’ve seen so many and all their personalities have been as indistinguishable as
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