didn’t drive.”
“What’s going on? Are you angry about something?”
He’d made it halfway across the room and was about to mount the stairs, but he pivoted, grabbing the railing for support. “I don’t have to explain myself to you. I’m the man of this house and I can do what I want.” Len knew he sounded like a petulant child, but between the alcohol and his general state of mind, he wasn’t in the mood to be quizzed.
“Where is this coming from?”
“You wanna control me.” When Cissy’s face went blank he plowed on. “Yeah, I found those websites you’ve been looking at. Giving me all those sexual favors is your way of controlling me, your way of getting me to do what you want. Well, fuck that. I’m the man, not you.”
“Oh you’re the man all right,” she answered with deadly calm. An alarm went off in the back of his head but he was too fuzzy to pay it much heed. “You’re the man, and you do what you want. That’s true enough. But there are two of us here, Len. Two of us in this marriage, and I’m tired of being the one who’s expected to not only work full-time but also to do most of the housework, the grocery shopping and the laundry. I’m not your maid, I’m your wife, and it’s time I got the respect I deserve. So yeah, I was trying to reward you for doing stuff for me in order to encourage you. How is that a bad thing? We both get something we want.”
“I don’t want to be controlled!”
Her voice remained quiet, but the color was high in her cheeks. “I’ve tried a million times to ask you to do more around the house, to cajole you, even to nag you. None of it worked, so I took more drastic measures. And it’s not just about the housework. That’s what I started with because it seemed like the easiest thing to fix.”
“What the fuck are you talking about?”
She gestured toward him. “This. I’m talking about this. The swearing. The disrespect. Did you ever notice that when we have sex—on your timeframe, I might add, not mine—I hardly ever come? I give you a blowjob almost every time, but you almost never go down on me. Then when you get ready to go, you rut on me like a bull on a cow. Have you even noticed I haven’t had an orgasm during sex in years?”
Len was stunned into silence even as his mouth hung open.
Cissy wasn’t done. Her tone turned vicious and he felt about two inches tall. “The look on your face tells me everything I need to know. So yes, I tried to control you. I did it to save our marriage. I can’t go on like this. I feel like I’m down around number five or six on your priority list.” Her hand slashed the air when he tried to speak. “I thought maybe if we started with something that was easily fixable we could move on to the harder stuff. But right now I’m tired and I’m going to bed. I have to work tomorrow. If you think you’re going to puke you’d better get a pan to put by the bed.”
She rushed past him and up the stairs before he could unlock his jaw. Was it really as bad as Cissy said? Was their marriage in trouble? He’d always taken it for granted Cissy would be with him forever. She was one of the only women he’d ever dated, and the only one he’d ever wanted to stay with.
Len actually smacked himself upside the head. Then, as the realization of exactly how much he’d had to drink dawned on him, he swayed. Yeah, he’d taken her for granted, all right. What had he been thinking? Through his own fucking stupidity he was throwing away the best thing that had ever happened to him. He guessed he’d figured she’d always be there, no matter what.
He followed Cissy up the stairs slowly, his tread heavy. Len was exhausted, but surprisingly sober. Hearing Cissy go off on him had shaken off the alcohol buzz pretty quickly. She was already in bed, her back turned to him. When he came around the end of the bed and spotted the tears tracking down her face, he sobered even more.
Dropping to his knees, he crooned,
“What’s going on? Are you angry about something?”
He’d made it halfway across the room and was about to mount the stairs, but he pivoted, grabbing the railing for support. “I don’t have to explain myself to you. I’m the man of this house and I can do what I want.” Len knew he sounded like a petulant child, but between the alcohol and his general state of mind, he wasn’t in the mood to be quizzed.
“Where is this coming from?”
“You wanna control me.” When Cissy’s face went blank he plowed on. “Yeah, I found those websites you’ve been looking at. Giving me all those sexual favors is your way of controlling me, your way of getting me to do what you want. Well, fuck that. I’m the man, not you.”
“Oh you’re the man all right,” she answered with deadly calm. An alarm went off in the back of his head but he was too fuzzy to pay it much heed. “You’re the man, and you do what you want. That’s true enough. But there are two of us here, Len. Two of us in this marriage, and I’m tired of being the one who’s expected to not only work full-time but also to do most of the housework, the grocery shopping and the laundry. I’m not your maid, I’m your wife, and it’s time I got the respect I deserve. So yeah, I was trying to reward you for doing stuff for me in order to encourage you. How is that a bad thing? We both get something we want.”
“I don’t want to be controlled!”
Her voice remained quiet, but the color was high in her cheeks. “I’ve tried a million times to ask you to do more around the house, to cajole you, even to nag you. None of it worked, so I took more drastic measures. And it’s not just about the housework. That’s what I started with because it seemed like the easiest thing to fix.”
“What the fuck are you talking about?”
She gestured toward him. “This. I’m talking about this. The swearing. The disrespect. Did you ever notice that when we have sex—on your timeframe, I might add, not mine—I hardly ever come? I give you a blowjob almost every time, but you almost never go down on me. Then when you get ready to go, you rut on me like a bull on a cow. Have you even noticed I haven’t had an orgasm during sex in years?”
Len was stunned into silence even as his mouth hung open.
Cissy wasn’t done. Her tone turned vicious and he felt about two inches tall. “The look on your face tells me everything I need to know. So yes, I tried to control you. I did it to save our marriage. I can’t go on like this. I feel like I’m down around number five or six on your priority list.” Her hand slashed the air when he tried to speak. “I thought maybe if we started with something that was easily fixable we could move on to the harder stuff. But right now I’m tired and I’m going to bed. I have to work tomorrow. If you think you’re going to puke you’d better get a pan to put by the bed.”
She rushed past him and up the stairs before he could unlock his jaw. Was it really as bad as Cissy said? Was their marriage in trouble? He’d always taken it for granted Cissy would be with him forever. She was one of the only women he’d ever dated, and the only one he’d ever wanted to stay with.
Len actually smacked himself upside the head. Then, as the realization of exactly how much he’d had to drink dawned on him, he swayed. Yeah, he’d taken her for granted, all right. What had he been thinking? Through his own fucking stupidity he was throwing away the best thing that had ever happened to him. He guessed he’d figured she’d always be there, no matter what.
He followed Cissy up the stairs slowly, his tread heavy. Len was exhausted, but surprisingly sober. Hearing Cissy go off on him had shaken off the alcohol buzz pretty quickly. She was already in bed, her back turned to him. When he came around the end of the bed and spotted the tears tracking down her face, he sobered even more.
Dropping to his knees, he crooned,
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