place, he calls to check in with me.
“ Tony, did you get that thing over to Victor’s place?”
“ Yeah, but you didn’t tell me what he does in the back room.”
“ Oh, you mean in the body shop portion of his place?”
“ Yeah, you could call it that. It wasn’t until I noticed his van parked out in back with the name ‘1800AUTOPSY’ painted on the side that I realized what the place was. This guy Victor’s been around for years. I’ve seen him plenty of times when he was doing some consulting work for the department. Oh, by the way, I peeked inside that envelope.”
“ Anything interesting?”
“ Well, that depends on what you consider interesting. It’s a couple of eight-by-tens of a dog dumping on a sidewalk. This must be a joke of some sort that someone’s playing on her.”
Tony doesn’t know it, but he just gave me some important information. It looks like that apartment manager is trying to put the pressure on April to move out, so he can get his new tenant moved in. Now that the proof of April’s lawbreaking is out in the open, we might as well put an end to her fear of prosecution. I call April.
“ Hi, it’s attorney Peter Sharp. Can you meet me at your local police station in an hour? I’m going to turn you in for breaking the law.”
“ Oh, my goodness. Why are you doing this to me? You’re supposed to be on my side. You’re my lawyer. I don’t want to go to jail.”
“ April, please trust me. You’re not going to jail. The worst thing that could happen is you might get issued a citation, like a parking ticket, and then there will be a fifty-dollar fine. Oh, by the way, bring some things with you – Charlie, your new scooper,” and your checkbook.”
She’s not too happy about my suggestion, but she reluctantly agrees to go along with meeting me there.
Victor has my cell phone number, and he’s calling me while I’m on the way to meet April at the cop house.
“ What’s up Victor?”
“ I got some prints off of the envelope, and some off of the art photos too.”
“ Oh, you like those shots do you? I can get some enlargements made that would be suitable for framing, or some wallet sized ones.”
“ Naw, thanks anyway Pete, I’ll stick with my collector’s version of those dogs playing poker. Anyway, I just wanted to let you know that the prints we lifted don’t match anything on file with the authorities, so whomever they belong to doesn’t have a criminal record or any kind of professional license. Have you got anything you want me to compare them to?”
I think about it for a second or two and then remember that the apartment building manager gave me his business card.
“ Yeah, come to think of it… I’ll be sending a business card over to your place, for comparison. Maybe we’ll get lucky.”
I’m glad the conversation is over, because I’m just pulling up to the police station, and this town has an ordinance that prohibits talking on a cell phone while you drive. I see through the front doors of the station that April is already here. She’s hard to miss.
Walking into the station, I see that she’s got Charlie on a leash, and she brought the extended pooper-scooper with her, like I instructed.
The desk sergeant is a friendly sort. “What can I do for you folks?”
I hand him my card. “I’m here with my client, and she wants to confess to a violation of one of your city regulations: Code Section 4.04.385.”
The sergeant rubs his chin while looking at me. He thumbs through his desk reference book. “You mean the dog dropping law?”
“ Yes sergeant, that’s the one. As you can see, my client might have had some difficulty in obeying it in the past, but she’s seen the error of her ways and has now purchased this extended scooper, which she religiously uses whenever taking her dog for a walk.”
The sergeant is deep in thought. “I’ll tell you what counselor; why not write your client’s name on the back of this business card
“ Tony, did you get that thing over to Victor’s place?”
“ Yeah, but you didn’t tell me what he does in the back room.”
“ Oh, you mean in the body shop portion of his place?”
“ Yeah, you could call it that. It wasn’t until I noticed his van parked out in back with the name ‘1800AUTOPSY’ painted on the side that I realized what the place was. This guy Victor’s been around for years. I’ve seen him plenty of times when he was doing some consulting work for the department. Oh, by the way, I peeked inside that envelope.”
“ Anything interesting?”
“ Well, that depends on what you consider interesting. It’s a couple of eight-by-tens of a dog dumping on a sidewalk. This must be a joke of some sort that someone’s playing on her.”
Tony doesn’t know it, but he just gave me some important information. It looks like that apartment manager is trying to put the pressure on April to move out, so he can get his new tenant moved in. Now that the proof of April’s lawbreaking is out in the open, we might as well put an end to her fear of prosecution. I call April.
“ Hi, it’s attorney Peter Sharp. Can you meet me at your local police station in an hour? I’m going to turn you in for breaking the law.”
“ Oh, my goodness. Why are you doing this to me? You’re supposed to be on my side. You’re my lawyer. I don’t want to go to jail.”
“ April, please trust me. You’re not going to jail. The worst thing that could happen is you might get issued a citation, like a parking ticket, and then there will be a fifty-dollar fine. Oh, by the way, bring some things with you – Charlie, your new scooper,” and your checkbook.”
She’s not too happy about my suggestion, but she reluctantly agrees to go along with meeting me there.
Victor has my cell phone number, and he’s calling me while I’m on the way to meet April at the cop house.
“ What’s up Victor?”
“ I got some prints off of the envelope, and some off of the art photos too.”
“ Oh, you like those shots do you? I can get some enlargements made that would be suitable for framing, or some wallet sized ones.”
“ Naw, thanks anyway Pete, I’ll stick with my collector’s version of those dogs playing poker. Anyway, I just wanted to let you know that the prints we lifted don’t match anything on file with the authorities, so whomever they belong to doesn’t have a criminal record or any kind of professional license. Have you got anything you want me to compare them to?”
I think about it for a second or two and then remember that the apartment building manager gave me his business card.
“ Yeah, come to think of it… I’ll be sending a business card over to your place, for comparison. Maybe we’ll get lucky.”
I’m glad the conversation is over, because I’m just pulling up to the police station, and this town has an ordinance that prohibits talking on a cell phone while you drive. I see through the front doors of the station that April is already here. She’s hard to miss.
Walking into the station, I see that she’s got Charlie on a leash, and she brought the extended pooper-scooper with her, like I instructed.
The desk sergeant is a friendly sort. “What can I do for you folks?”
I hand him my card. “I’m here with my client, and she wants to confess to a violation of one of your city regulations: Code Section 4.04.385.”
The sergeant rubs his chin while looking at me. He thumbs through his desk reference book. “You mean the dog dropping law?”
“ Yes sergeant, that’s the one. As you can see, my client might have had some difficulty in obeying it in the past, but she’s seen the error of her ways and has now purchased this extended scooper, which she religiously uses whenever taking her dog for a walk.”
The sergeant is deep in thought. “I’ll tell you what counselor; why not write your client’s name on the back of this business card
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