Wait For Me by Lissa Matthews

of her didn’t care. The more they talked about it, the more real it became. Her blinders were off, ripped away by Dane and his words from earlier, but that didn’t mean she didn’t want to go back to not knowing, not realizing the danger Vin was in every day.
    Pride in him, pride in his service to their country was nothing new. She’d always admired him and supported him and loved him for putting others above himself. He was made to be in the service, made for the military, made to save others who couldn’t save themselves, to fight for them when they needed someone stronger.
    She just always thought he’d come home after the service. Not that he’d take on an even more dangerous job.
    “You’re thinking. Your body is tense and tight. I love you, Mel. I’ve always loved you. You’re beautiful and bright and everything a man like me shouldn’t touch. But I can’t help myself. I was the boy from the wrong side of the tracks. I was born into a family of druggies and thieves. I didn’t want that for myself, ever. And then, the day I met you... Oh, darlin ’. You’re the most precious thing in this world to me, and what I do, where I go, those I fight, are all for you, to protect you, to keep you just as you are. Safe, free, alive.”
    “Vin—”
    “Hush. You think it’s easy for me to do this, to leave you? Mel, it’s harder than anything else I do. I wish I could say my deeds and motives were more noble like world peace for the sake of world peace. Truth is, my motives have never been that magnanimous. You’re my reason and my motive, Mel. Always. The world is sick and ugly and cruel. I’ve seen it, I’ve stared it down, I’ve killed it and it keeps coming back. So I keep doing what I do with the hope that it never touches you. Dane had no right to dig into me, into my life, or to darken your eyes with pain and fear. And for that too, I’m sorry.”
    He tangled his free hand in her hair and pulled her head back. For long moments, he simply looked at her, stared into her eyes, which she couldn’t help blinking because of the tears that kept pooling and falling. She’d never heard such sweetness, such sadness, such fierceness from Vin before. She was in awe of him.
    “You must think me so silly.” She was embarrassed to utter the words but it had to be true. A silly little girl. Here she was, pining for him and pissed because he kept leaving her, and he was off being a hero and saving lives.
    If she could have crawled away, she would have.
    He leaned forward and kissed her tears where they rested on her eyelashes. He was so tough and so tender.
    “You’re not silly and I’ve never once thought you were. You have the life I want you to have. You live happy and carefree and believe the world is a good and decent place because that’s what me and guys like me are trying to make it. You worry about me, you love me, and those things mean so much to me, baby. I’m sorry everyone looks at you with anything less than admiration. I never wanted that. I’ve never said the words because I didn’t want you wasting your life waiting, staring out the window, knowing there’s a possibility that I’ll…” He stopped, left the unspoken, the words they both felt in the silence. He took a deep breath and continued, his voice rougher. “You were so young when I left the first time and you’re still so young. You’ve got years ahead of you and God willing you’ll spend them with me. I’ve never asked, Mel, but at the same time, I’ve never set you free. I’ve never given you an out, but if you want—”
    “No.” She dug her nails, such as they were, into his skin. “Never. I don’t want an out. I don’t want to be free of you. Goddammit , Vin... Don’t you get that?”
    He smiled, predatory and possessive. “Yeah, baby girl, I do.”
    They stared at one another. His blue eyes, dark with intensity and heat, burned through her. She’d see that look every time she closed her own from now on. It